Quentin

Since i was 4 i have been having head injuries, pretty bad too. I keep having dreams that make things explode, suicidal thoughts were i play the scenes through my head, and these weird circles moving around in my vision. like little bubbles, i hate to confess but i kinda did somethin stupid. I blew up a .22 bullet on accident with a butane torch, and it blew up. i was peppered with little fragments everywhere, also didn't have a shirt on. Box says copper coated lead bullet. When ever i do hard physical excersise i get a crying headache its so bad. it goes like glasses from the right eye wavy to my ear, then it goes to the soft part of the skull and around to my left eye. It feels like its pulling my eye into my skull and left. also my head bleeds, i know this cause when i comb my hair little chunks of dried blood show up when im combing. should I be worried about my health? also i have tried suicide 6 times by aspirin, motrin, tylenol, cutting, train hit, car hit. can't go to the doctor though, mom goes with me so i cant say what i really want to say. btw im 13

I collect weapons but it's not enough and it's too expensive and no one likes me for it. I can hunt but then again i need a new gun. I am pyro as hell almost died but it's too hard. I'm 13 and nothing is working. I have almost no money and everything is boring, can anyone help?