I am, thank goodness, happily married. I have a friend who is not. She and her husband are trying to talk about the future and goals before she takes other steps but he is not making moves to work on issues that she has raised.
I am fascinated with your responses so far. They are all insightful.
Catt
Favorite Answer
seeing a atty to find out what the laws of your state are.
me
Make sure you REALLY want to take that step. Even if you manage to smooth things over afterward and end up back together, there can be lasting impacts. If you're absolutely certain that this is the best step for your relationship (and any kids you have) contact an attourney - some will give a preliminary consultation for free or a reduced fee.
oh, and forget the idiot advice about "hide what you want.." that someone gave. You can get in a LOT of trouble for that if it comes to divorce.
diamondgranch1958
First get a lawyer. Set up your own checking account. Have a stash of cash, cloths and car keys with a trusted friend. Its better if you have your own job to support yourself. Make sure that the deed to your car and house have your name on them instead of just spouse. Find a place to rent or a friend to stay with if you can't stay in the house. And most important of all "BE NICE ABOUT EVERYTHING" You never know when some nasty remark or action will come back to bite you in the butt. Epically in court in front a judge.
yeller
A great way to help you sort out what you want to do it to have an honest talk with your spouse about what you are considering, then get you both into a group called Divorce Care. It's not to get you divorced or to make you stay together, rather geared toward helping you figure out what to do in a responsible way.
www.divorcecare.org website will give you a group near you.
I wish you the best.
d-cup
1. Evaluate your finances - start setting aside some money
2. See a lawyer (particularly if you have children)
3. Discreetly find other living arrangments