When my guy is not with me he will visit the local bar just as soon as he gets off work till bed time.?

I do not believe he is doing anything wrong and he does take me with to this same local bar usually on Friday nights for a bit. If he frequents this bar anytime he is not with me--should I be concerned?? Is he an alcoholic?? And then he lies to be about how long he was there?? This does not sit well with me....should I confront him....or just leave it alone...and chalk it up to this is just the way he is ---aceept it or move on....Your advise please?

Bob2006-11-08T09:09:07Z

Favorite Answer

Let the guy relax.

Lottie W2006-11-08T17:23:17Z

RUN!!!
It means that you and drinking are all he can think of to do with his life. If he isn't a drunk, why wouldn't he go home and study, watch tv or do dishes? If he isn't a drunk, he would not lie to you about it? Drunks deny the problem. Others have to recognize it.
MY advice, dear girl, is to tell him that he needs to get a life. It is important that you tell him you are not going to live with a drunk. This is NOT the way he could be. He is lazy and not creative, and getting into a VERY bad habit.
Can't you do any better than THAT?
He IS doing something wrong! He knows it, or he would tell you the truth. He is drinking a lot, wasting his life, and lying to his girl. What else doees he have to do before you get out? Cheat? Blow money he doesn't have? Forget to go home?
Tell him if he wants to spend any more time with you -in between his living at the bar--he needs to get a hobby or do something productive, and quite being a lazy jerk.
Then decide whether YOU want to live(or be related to) with a drunk or if he will change that behavior to keep you.
If not, wish him well, and lose him.
If so, watch him for other self-destructive and lazy attitudes. You are in for a rough ride with a drunk, who doesn't see anything wrong with his behaviour.
Good luck.

Anonymous2006-11-10T18:42:19Z

if he drinks five or six days ( nights ) a week after work from the time eh leaves work until the time for bed, honey his has a big problem and so do you, that is call an alcoholic by any book...and he needs to get to a rehab or at least a doctor for help.....
and if you do not believe him now..you never will ..it will always be in the back of your mind what he may be doing when your not there and with whom and if you believe he is leaving and doing stuff.it will be in your mind forever and ever...you need to fix the problems one at a time..or maybe all at once...go sit and watch his car/truck at the bar..sit where he can't see your car, but you can see the door to the bar...but how are you going to get home before he does....so if you sit and you see home come out with a gal..can you let it go until you hire a private investigator to take pics...
but anyway..he is and he needs help...
and babe, so do you......family members of alcoholics say nothing is wrong .. and all the time they are hurting so bad inside they could explode....
so even if it is only you that goes to a meeting..maybe you can go to a few and see for yourself..then at least you get help and at least you know...

good luck
smile
and
God bless

wish I were2006-11-08T17:13:29Z

Sounds like you are dating a functioning drunk.

They go to work everyday and do whatever they are supposed to do, but they get drunk everyday also. You need to decide if this is what you want for your life or not. My girlfriend is with one and he's a good guy, but has problems in the bedroom cuz of the drinking and he gets so drunk at functions, he can't hardly talk. Some women don't mind, I would.

lil monkey2006-11-08T17:11:06Z

When people lie about drinking alcohol it usually suggests they have a problem with it, which could lead to becomin a alcoholic. But you should defo ask him about it, if hes got nofing to hide it'll b ok. Just tell him your concerned.

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