Alcoholic? Should I be concerned if my BF drinks about a case of beer in a week? Does he have a drinking prob?
I started dating my boyfriend about 5 months ago. We are very much in love with each other. Everything is perfect (too good so far) except that I am just concerned that if he drinks about a case of beer in a week- it may be a sign that he could have a drinking problem. My father and mother got divorced because my dad was an alcoholic and I do not want to marry and alcoholic and end up in divorce to. Not if I can avoid it. I am just proceding with caution and I don't know if this would be a reason to consider ending our relationship over this. I care for him so much but just don't want to be blind to a potential long-term problem. What do I do? Any advice or suggestions? If a person drinks a case of beer a week make you an alcoholic?
DawnDavenport2006-12-11T16:46:35Z
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It sounds like he may have a drinking problem although there are many people with alcohol dependence that drink a hell of alot more than that. Do you know how long he's been drinking? Can he go without drinking? If he doesn't drink does he have withdrawal symptoms like anxiety and shakiness? Some alcoholics only have a few drinks a day while some drink from the time they wake up until they go to bed. If you're concerned maybe you should bring those concerns up to him. He may get angry and defensive but don't take it personally.
A case of beer is a bit much--that's over 3 beers a day but then again there are just some people who have a high tolerance for alcohol. I think what's more important is his behavior regaurding the alcohol. Does he drink it when he's in a bad mood or after a stressful day--and every day is a stressful day? Does he drink them on an empty stomach or does he just happen to drink them in the evening as he's watching TV or playing videogames? Has his drinking interferred with your lives as a couple? How does he react if alcohol is not available? Does he shrug it off and order a Coke or does he get agitated?
If you really care about him, tell him you're concerned and see if he's able to limit his drinking. If he's unable or unwilling, I think you may have your answer.
Steph: Your perception is raising a red flag !!! Your are right to think that there is something wrong in the making. There's about a 90% chance that your b/f is heading into the direction of alcoholism, although he doesn't appear to of have arrived there , as of YET ! Does he have a parent, uncle, aunt, cousin, Grand parent, who either, is or was a practising alcoholic? Even, someone, who likes to drink all the time ... perhaps? Further; Steph, BE WARNED ... YOU will have the tendency to hook-up with a drinker because of the problem with it being in YOUR family (father). Alcoholism IS a family disease because everyone within the family becomes affected !!! The behaviour patterns for coping with an alcoholic in the family, transfers throughout the family and is carried forward, into the marriages and families of those coping. Thus, the potential for having a b/f or g/f who is a drinker or alcoholic increases vastly ! Sadly; this IS a good reason to end the relationship. Try checking out the web for alcoholism, for more specific traits of behaviour for the alcoholic. Steph ... have you been into Counselling yourself or have you been to Ala-teen for coping skills for living with an alcoholic? Good luck to you, Steph; I know life has been difficult for you !
No, he is not an alcoholic. That is barely over 3 beers a day. I would worry more about the beer gut in his future. Any drinking could be an issue simply due to your past experiences, so I would suggest finding a way to address this now, or one day he'll be on beer number 3 and you will lay into him seemingly out of the blue. This is the type of thing that nagging only makes worse, so get it out in the open. And be nice about it, all you need to do is come down on him hard in front of his idiot friends, then they will start giving him a hard time, and he will have to pickle his liver occasionally just to save face.
For one you should sit him down and ask him why he drinks so much. SOme people drink more that and also drink hard liquor. But if he really loves you he will curb his tthrist for beer some or alot. But you need to talk with him and explain the situation about how he might be drinking too much. But if he keeps drinking like that he will become an alcoholic. AND you are going to need some patientence if he decides to cut down cause it will take a while and will be hard for him. But just tell him if it doesn't change your leaving him and make him think hard if he's really in love with you.