MATURE ADULTS PLEASE!! My Son SAW me in BED with my girlfriend NOW my EX-wife-to-be is Messing my life?

READ BEFORE YOU ANSWER:My G/friend & I came home.I saw the kids with the babysitter.We went to my bedroom LOCKED the door.While we were making love my 5yrs old son walked to my bed & said “Daddy I can’t get out, the door won’t open”.My G/friend was on top of me.She jumped off & scrambled to get under the sheets.I asked my son to turn around.I literally felt sick that my son saw this.Apparently 3hrs earlier(before our arrival) the kids were playing“hide & Seek”.My son fell asleep under my bed as he was hiding.Our love-making woke him.He said he crawled to the door to get out but it was locked so he had no choice but to come & tell me.I don’t know how long he stood there & watched before he decided to approach us.Now my WIFE(soon to be EX-WIFE in about 5 months) is poisoning my kids.We are no longer together.my g/friend was sickened by the whole thing & blames herself.She can't even look at my son.My wife & I ve been separated & ve not lived together 4 over 3 yrs.Read more at the bottom

2007-06-06T19:02:08Z

YesI'm very mad at myself that my son saw what he did,but there is no way i could ve known he was under my bed.I ve to live with this guilt.Iexplained the best way i could to a 5yrs old & apologized.My wife(legally anyway)blames myG/friend.She called myG/friend & curse at her,accused her of ruining my son's young life.What makes me mad is that she has caused my G/friend to break-up with me.Our divorce will be final in 5 months.this woman is the first serious G/friend i ve had since we separated.She is calling me an "N"lover.YES my G/friend is black.(the most beautiful woman i ve ever seen).She(my wife) tells our 3 kids to call her"N".My youngest said"Mommy says that the "N"woman is the reason we are not a family".Which is not true because i met her 3 yes later after the separation.My G/friend,like my children,is an innocent victim in all this.How can i deal with this situation?What would you do? I miss my g/friend it's killing me?What right does my wife ve to do this.She has had 3 B/Fs

Anonymous2007-06-06T19:11:29Z

Favorite Answer

I don't really understand the problem. your sexcapades with your girlfriend has nothing to do with your separated ex-wife poisoning your children. you haven't done anything wrong.

Talkstress2007-06-06T19:13:31Z

Your wife needs help. Quickly.

First of all, dear, you have done nothing wrong. Obviously, if you would have known that your children were anywhere nearby I truly doubt you would indulge in a little "afternoon delight."

It is bad enough that your ex-wife is a racist cow but she has to poison your kids as well. Unfortunately, your girlfriend feels like crap because she knows your kids will never treat her with respect.

There's hope. Put your foot down and refuse to let your ex-wife talk about your girlfriend in that way. Secondly, do not accept that sort of behavior from your children. Make sure they know that love sees beyond color and that they should as well. Lastly, call your girlfriend up and give her a sincere apology for the things that transpired. Sounds like things are serious between you two. You've come this far why lose this due to your wife's inability to be a human being.

Good Luck!!! @--->---

Penelope Smith2007-06-06T19:12:00Z

Whoa, dude. You're wife is a freak.

All kids see their parents in some sexual act at one time or another and largely it's not a big deal. Sure it's startling at the time, but it's not going to have lasting repercussions so long as you don't turn it into the tragedy of the year.

The real problem here is the venom that your wife is spewing. She is teaching your children to be racist and cruel. She is paving the way for future hate crimes and violence and I would urge you do discuss this with your lawyer.

One other thing I would suggest is going for counseling with your kids. And your girlfriend too, if she's willing. It would be good to work on some of the issues like racism and privacy and what you all expect from one another in a safe, controlled setting.

You sound like a decent guy. Know that I'm rooting for you. Take care...

?2016-08-11T19:35:01Z

You must be hanging your son first before your new girlfriend. The 2 men and women who're principal in your son's lives are YOU and your EX, no longer your sister, brother, new female friend or something else you are trying to drive into his life. What's excellent for you son is for you to go to dinner with you ex, then attend his ball recreation and watch him open his items. If your lady friend can't handle these few hours, then you are with the flawed man or woman.

Sweet Suzy 777!2007-06-06T19:50:33Z

Well if you are divorcing your wife because of adultery on her part, you are okay. But since your divorce is not final and you are in bed with your new girl friend, you are committing adultery. You know it is wrong and you feel guilty about it, as well you should. Unfortunately your young child caught you. I don't believe the child's life is ruined by this. Maybe a little confused.
It is wrong for your wife to get your kids to call your gf bad names. I don't think there is anything you can do to stop her from that. You could talk to your children and tell them how wrong it is to call her that bad name.
You should wait to have any more intimate relations with your gf until your divorce is final and you are married to her. That would be setting the best example for your children and it would be following God's laws. Adultery is a sin and it has dire consequences. You have free will and can choose to commit adultery, but you can not choose the consequences. Careful now, you are walking on dangerous ground.
If your gf really cares about you, she will wait for you to marry her. Unfortunately in broken families, she will not just be marrying you, she will be taking on your broken family. She should decide if she really wants all of that burden.

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