I can't go into details here, except to say that he is truly evil. I guess I never really believed in evil, not real evil, but he is. He's done things that are worse than cruel and he thinks it's funny. Hurting people is fun to him. Rape is fun to him. The problem is he is still my son and regardless of what he's done I still love him. Anyone have any idea how to get over the knowledge that I can never let him into my life again. I'm in mourning, but must stay strong as he keeps trying to call me. I don't answer, but it's painful. Is there nothing I can do but go through this pain? Thank you in advance for your answers. peace
2007-10-24T07:43:34Z
He's 25. He'll never be able to prove to me that he has changed. He stayed for 2 months with me this time in order to prove he was a good person. I can't let him back in long enough to find out if he has changed or not. I won't ever see him again. I have post traumatic stress disorder and am a multiple, my son did his best to convince me I am worse when really I have gotten a lot better. Several psychiatrists have told me I would have to live out most of my life in a mental ward. I have proved them wrong and live a fairly normal life. My son tried to convince me that I was getting worse. He played all kinds of tricks on me, knowing exactly what to do to freak me out. I won't ever see him again as he did make me a bit worse. All of this is hard to get my head or heart around.
peterbilt1972007-10-24T07:06:18Z
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I'm sorry to hear about your situation, but I do believe you're doing the right thing. It's called "tough love", and it's called that for a reason. You didn't cut the ties between you & your son because you wanted to...you had to. Yes, you must stay strong. When you feel yourself starting to weaken, or feel you're about to give in, think about your safety. Think about the safety of others that might be exposed to your sons evil ways because you let your guard down. Trust me, i know how you feel. I had a simular experience with my oldest son, and for the protection of my youngest, I had to report my oldest to the police. I hope I've helped.
At this point I think you might want to think about getting a restraining order on him, so that he can not come near you, call you, have any kind of contact with you or he will be arrested. That should get the point to him to back off & leave you a lone. Now as for you, you need to get counseling talk over these issues you have with your son with a professional. And if your son has done something illegal, or has physcially hurt someone then he needs to be put in jail or some place where you can't hurt another person. And if you know for a fact that this has taken place & you have done nothing about it you could be held liable also for concealing evidence. Do what is the right thing, for your safety & the possible the safety of others.
This is a tough one. I do not know if a simple answer can really help you. What I do know is that human being are social creatures and that the right social bonding and nourishment can go a long way in helping others.
Discarding ones son, even if he is pass the age of majority is not a good solution to a problem. There is a difference between discarding him and not having association with him. Receive his calls but make sure he understands your position in the situation and that your only objective is to provide the parental love he needs. Who knows, people can change. For instance the Jehovah Witnesses and the Black Muslim Organization have a strong prison ministry that have a very rate of success in changing harden criminals and turning them into productive citizen irregardless of religious beliefs. The point never abandon anyone when there is still hope.
What ever you do you must stay strong. He will always be your son and it's not your fault how he has turned out. As he is an adult he has made his own choices and he must face the consequences for his actions and stand on his own two feet. All you can do is keep being strong and hope with time the pain will lessen slightly. I don't think you will ever completely get over something as awful as this. I have a friend who has a similar story to yours and she kept relenting and seeing her son, he eventually tried to blackmail her and threatened her with a shotgun. She has now had to cut all ties with him and I know it really hurts her, she feels as though she has lost him. I wish you all the best with this, I know it's going to be really tough but, for his own good, don't let him back into your life.
Hey it's me, boy you got a tough one I hope I can help. I was a multiple also. 13 to be precise God heals so what the doctors tell you may be what they know but I know a Master physician and He heals all. As far as your son. That is one of the hardest things you will have to do. I agree if you know for a fact he is breaking the law love him enough to turn him in.Evil does take control of people and will play on your weaknesses. I have dealt with this also if you want to e-mail me I will relate some more of it. For your safety and for your soul you need to separate yourself from him and let God handle him. He WILL!!!!! Guilt is another way that evil works on our minds so don't let your guilt work on you that way he is 25 and responsible for his own actions YOU ARE NOT responsible for his actions. He got that way because he made choices.!!! Love in Christ If you need to talk further contact me..