Christians, how can we make this forum a better place to be without sending out violation notices?

A lot of people are blaming the Christians for their intolerance on this forum. Most of my friends, including many Christians, are getting violation notices, often for things that really do not violate the TOS. In fact, several Christians are leaving the forum because of the issues going on in what is becoming a police state on here.

What is happening as a result is an air of distrust and animosity towards the Christians here.

In the zeal to "clean up this town" a lot of resentment is being generated, because many questions are not worthy of a violation notice.

Do you really think that sending out a violation notice is the way that Jesus would handle this?

Why not answer a counterpoint,, thumbs down, or better yet ignore those questions you don't like?

Do you really think that Jesus would click on the report button for every post he did not approve of?

Help me to learn why you feel a need to click on the report button?

Anonymous2008-03-22T11:54:04Z

Favorite Answer

Wish I'd gotten to this earlier. I doubt many will see what I have to say.

If I may use us as an example, Searcher . . .

Everyone: Searcher is one of my contacts. She is a Christian. I'm agnostic. She's vehemently pro-life. I'm vehemently pro-choice. She's a self-described "fundie." I'm a sarcastic, cynical snot.

We absolutely adore each other.

If the two of us can not only get along, but also have great respect and love for each other, the rest of you--believers and nonbelievers alike--can knock off the reporting.

I say this ESPECIALLY if you are American. You cannot believe in freedom of speech AND report people. It is an illogical contradiction in theory. Instead of running to the "authorities," take a stand and challenge that person. If someone offends you, say so and respectfully explain why. In other words, step up and be adults about it.

Show some maturity. Show an appreciation for those who are different from you. Show the people who post "offensive" material that they are being inappropriate, not by reporting them, but by taking the high road and explaining WHY they are being offensive. If they don't listen, don't try to control the situation by reporting. Just move on. You can't change them.

If we all took responsibility for our own words, I think everyone on here would be a lot happier.

/rant

EDIT: Case in point, Oregon Flower reported me because I called her out on something she said that I thought was hateful. I did so by asking a question about her statement, stating she was the one who said it, and linking to her comment.

Yet here she is not taking responsibility for the reporting she's done. She claims she "rarely" reports, yet I know several in my contacts who have been reported by her.

I'm calling you out again, Oregon Flower. Are you going to report me?

encourager4God2008-03-22T09:44:58Z

I have been reported for asking for prayer for other people and even reported after I got best answer.

I reported 2 people men because they were very verbally abusive with my question and sexually perverted. I am a married woman and would havenone of that. I also took the liberty of blocking these people as well.

I have learned choose only the battles to fight that you are wiling to lose. Pick and choose your battles carefully. No when to stand up for yourself and when to back off.

Also I do give thumbs down to mean or sacrastic answers, but the report button I only use when the person is blanatnly abusive and I have wrote my reasons why. This is a relgion and spirituality forum where people come to learn and grow and ask questions that they may not be able to ask or feel comfortable asking anyone else.

There is enough hurt, meanness and negativity in the world without adding to this to the R7S forum.

Yes I am a christian. But that does not mean I have the right to be superior or act like I am better than anyone else. We are all called to love and encourage oneanother and I remind that to my nephew and nieces when they fight as well.

People are reporting people yes but that is only a temeporary fix revenge is sweet but frogivness is even sweeter we need to pray for those on line who are hostile and reporting others simply because they did not like what they wrote. I say it is a temprary fix because it gives a sense of satifcation that the person got back at the person who worte the question but does not fix the heart condition. Peace this was a beautiful post thank you e4g

The Frugal Shopper2008-03-22T09:05:58Z

Good question. And a very vaild point.

I have recieved two notices, for answers that someone just didn't like and they didn't break any rules. I also have recieved two nasty emails for my position, that the other person didn't like. One apologized, when he posted his own question, and realized I was right. The other was a huge rant about something, that I should believe, that is occult... and I thought it was really inappropriate.

As for the 'report' button. I only use it, if there is clear violation of the TOS. LIKE: swearing and cursing at ANY one for their beliefs, it doesn't have to be directed at me and no one comes on the forum to be swore at for their answers. If the posting question is delibertally ment to be hateful for a certain religion, group, etc... same applies, doesn't matter that I am a Christian, no one should insight hatred on here towards anyone. I definately ignore the questions that are so inappropriate that they shouldn't be answered, but don't fall under the 'hatred' guide... I think the thumbs down is 'okay' but almost pointless, because everyone is stating an opinion, and who are we to say 'booo' to that...it is theirs and they are entitled to it. I can see the thumbs up, because it is nice to see an answer that I agree with, and then let the person know, that they had a well thought out answer and it describes the situation, or question well for the person asking the question.

I thought about leaving the forum last week, after the one question I posted. I had several decent answers, then they started to get mean... I deleted it. I didn't ask a rude or inappropriate question...but some people were answering, and being cruel to the others that were answering... so I deleted my own question to stop the spread of the nastiness.

After that, I considered leaving the forum, or just not posting any more. I changed my mind, chose to stay for a while and see if this is a bad case of imaturity on the part of some individuals and wait it out for a while. That doesn't mean that I will tolerate abusive words or slander, towards anyone.

I have had people email me, knowing that I am a compassionate person, crying. Because they are so crushed by what a group of strangers say!!

The immaturity on the board needs to stop, that is for sure. Because it is really easy to hide behind computers, and post hate, but in life are these people this way? I'd like to see more of the real person, and less of the bold but cowardess of people. Able to hide behind an avatar, say no to emails/IM, no to what you have answered/questions posted ... and start acting like adults. State your opinion and move the next question without slandering someone else's opinion.

:-)

Great question... Gold star!!

Gwenith O2008-03-22T09:03:55Z

I'm probably just repeating what others of my opinion have said but I'll add a twist :-)

Preaching and quoting the bible as if it will answer all questions without doubts is probably what piss a lot of people off. Its as if Religous people have only that source for discussion (if they think its enough....well it most certainly is not!)

To your questions: "Do you really think that sending out a violation notice is the way that Jesus would handle this?" and "Do you really think that Jesus would click on the report button for every post he did not approve of?"

I don't really think Athiests care what Jesus would Do. I think it is highly childish and unintelligent to report a question they don't like just because it has something to do with the bible! And athiests HATE being called unintelligent!

But if they are up against silly things like "well it says in John 3:14...blah blah blah" The best they could do is ignore it...you can't answer questions that blind lambs posted.

To answer your last question...in ever race and in every religion and in every walk of life there will be the good of that group and there will be the bad. Unfortunately it is usually the bad that raise the most noise and you hear more about. It is the reserved and wise that are only whispers around you. You just happen to be getting reported by the bad of the athiests. I'm very sorry on behalf of them.

Pirate AM™2008-03-22T08:57:04Z

We should stick to only reporting violations against the Guidelines and TOS. Everyone also needs to realize that R&S does tolerate a small amount of chatting and the regulars have certain customs and relationship.

We need to recognize that this is a public forum about Religion and Spirituality, it is not about or for a single religion.

Edit:
By using the term "we", I'm trying to say that this in not just a problem limited or perpetuated by a single group. It persists on all sides.

Edit 2:
There was a good point made above, most responsible participants have their Q&A's public and allow email (at least until they get too much hate email).

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