worst language ever?????(joke)?

There is no egg in the eggplant, no ham in the hamburger and neither
Pine nor apple in the pineapple. English muffins were not invented in
England, French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted.

But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly, boxing rings are
square and guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it
a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth,
shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth.

If the teacher taught, why didn't the preacher
praught. If a vegetarian eats vegetables,
what the heck does a humanitarian eat!?


Why do people recite at a play yet play at a recital? Park
on driveways and drive on parkways.


You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language
where a house can burn up as it burns down and in which
you fill in a form by filling it out. And a bell
is only heard once it goes!

2008-04-10T16:09:19Z

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the
creativity of the human race (which of course isn't a race at all).

That is why when the stars are out they are visible, but when
the lights are out they are invisible.

And why is it that when I wind up my watch it starts
but when I wind up this story it ends?

And more......................... Some food for "Thought"

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy
adultery?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a
person who drives a race car not called a racist?

Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?

Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?

If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make
terrible?

Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?

2008-04-10T16:09:38Z

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow
that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted,
cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons
debarked and dry cleaners depressed?

Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion
stars in the universe you will believe them, but
if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will
have to touch it to be sure?

If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times,
does he become disoriented?

If people from Poland are called "Poles,"
why aren't people from Holland called Holes?"

2008-04-10T16:09:59Z

dont 4get 2 ********** it

2008-04-10T16:10:07Z

dont 4get 2 **********star it

2008-04-10T17:26:30Z

i got it from my friend

Anonymous2008-04-17T02:27:24Z

Favorite Answer

Why is it called a "building" when it is already built?
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
Why is the word "abbreviate" so long?
Why is Joey short for Joe, when Joey has more letters?
(In English)....Why do we say "an alarm going off," if it is really going on?
If Practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then why practice?
Opposite is an English word right?...What's the opposite of opposite?
Bit irrelavant to language would this one has made me think for a while now....'What would happen if a vampire bit a werewolf and vice-a-versa?'
'What do you call a female daddy long legs?'
Another irrelavant one to language 'How do signs saying 'Please do not walk on the grass' get there?'
Why do people say heads up when you should duck?
'Can fat people go Skinny Dipping?'
Can crop circles be square?
When a boy is named after his dad, he is called 'Junior,' but what do you call a girl that is named after her mother?
Ive noticed that in the English language alot of people use the term 'Died of old age'...my queery is 'How old do you have to be to qualify for 'Death by old age?'

swd2008-04-10T18:12:45Z

And you missed this one.

Does anybody ever vanish without a trace?

If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?

If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?

Isn't it a little scary that a doctor's work is called "practice"?

What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man? (not a language 1 I know)

Anonymous2008-04-15T08:32:25Z

That is a great presentation on our language, Patriot. I am sending this to an English literature teacher friend that will love that.

How the heck are you today? I made it back from our anniversary get away but WANT TO GO BACK.

SANDY :o)

Pauline2016-04-08T01:03:56Z

Nice! Here's a star.

Madhukar2008-04-15T04:28:30Z

All these mistakes are similar to the one you made in asking

'Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?'

instead of

'Why isn't 11 pronounced tenty one?'

Show more answers (9)