Fat crush on this college boy I've known for a month. But he has a gf... What do I do?!?!?

I have a fat crush on this amazing college freshman. I am also a college freshman and we live near each other. The first couple weeks of school we totally hit it off and hung out together all the time. There was even "innocent" touching (none of the bases or anything, just like holding hands and standing close and leaning on each other). He told me all sorts of secrets and just stuff in general and I totally fell for him: really smart, funny, ballsy, cute, social but also nerdy, etc. The problem is that he has a girlfriend of two years who is all the way across the country at a really good school as well. He was totally open with me about this relationship (it's an open relationship, but they're still together). So I told him no closeness because he has a girlfriend and he was fairly good about that and we'd still hang out lots of the time. I still really like him. I don't think he's being a jerk/using me although my girlfriend from home who has never met him isn't so sure. He hasn't been as close recently but I still really like him. Advice for how to get him? Advice for action steps? What do I do next?

2008-10-19T17:37:36Z

As far as me "making moves" on a guy who has a girlfriend is part of the reason I'm so conflicted. I wouldn't do anything for real for real unless they were no longer together. But at the same time she told him he could do whatever he wanted (as in, even have sex with other girls, etc.) so I feel like they terminated the relationship without actually ending it. I feel like how it is they'll most definately hook up over breaks when they get to see each other again. But unless they have something really special long distance relationships don't last forever, right? And first loves... I'm trying to be respectful of their relationship and her (because I don't want to be a ***** or slut or bf stealer) while still respecting my feelings for him and my desire to maybe have the relationship develop into something more. He's really something: guys like him don't come along all that often...

abbeycoolit2008-10-19T17:25:05Z

Favorite Answer

The decision is really yours to make since only you can make the decision that needs to be made.Since he has been honest with you about his girlfriend , you have one of two choices:1) hold on to your initial decision and have nothing romantic to do with him 2) if you still feel the same way about him then you can change your mind especially in light of the fact that they have an open relationship.Those are your only way to go.He may be pulling back because he is starting to develop some emotional feelings for you, or because he is interpreting your decision against closeness to include no contact like before, or you no longer wish to be close to him any more because he has a girlfriend.That is why the answer is up to you since it will be based on how you currently feel about him and how much you are willing to change your position about dating him. Think long and hard about this one because any choice you make has the potential to cause you some pain.

Olivia M2008-10-19T17:10:33Z

tell him how you feel. if he hasn't been as close as he was before than he could feel the same way for you, but you never know. guys are weird. But i would go for it even though he has a girl friend to see how he takes it. maybe he'll notice that a long distance relationship isn't right for him and what he has right in front of him is what he needs.

♥Pungent♥ ♥O'dare♥2008-10-19T17:10:20Z

leave him alone, if you were someone's gf, you wouldn't want another female making moves on him.

→[[σиℓу σиє {ME]]♥ ™2008-10-19T17:09:30Z

Um...let it go