Adoptees who have children?

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I believe my children are beginning to take their disturbance over what has happened to me and move it into the realm of public discourse.

Together we have supported one another without any extended family. They have admired my strength over the years but sensed the toll my efforts were taking, having no one who supported me. And they watched in horror as it all began to unravel. They stood by me as I questioned the meaning of living and they know they are the reason I am here today. I burdened them with my story because I had no one left to share it with, for which I am sorry.

Prior to that event, we did not talk about adoption. Since that event, they know I have been sorting it out and I must speak about it. They know of my blogs and my work and can access it whenever they want.

I bring it up to them more than I should, but I can't help it, as they are my best friends. I am sure that seeing someone as strong as me brought to me knees and so profoundly affected by adoption has affected them as well. They tell me about discussions they have with other people, debunking myths and debating pop culture ideas about adoption.

They are my children. They have been raised to work towards making the world a better place. They have been raised to be aware of social justice issues, they were raised seeing me volunteer for causes, they were raised to be aware of their civil rights, they were raised to be critical thinkers, and they were raised to think for themselves.

They don't know who their natural grandmother was. They don't know their mother's adoptive parents or family. They know their agrandfather was a child molester. They know their mother was strong yet still suffers. They know how important us staying together and being there for each other was. They know they almost lost their mother. They have sat back in disbelief as she battled with her adoption agency to obtain any breadcrumb of information about her original identity. They are willing to bless her moving to another country to reclaim her birth culture, even though they will miss her. They know they have more history and look forward to finding out more. They know they will be gaining some of that culture as well. They may not have been adopted, but they have their own adoption story.

Adoption affects us all....Show more

Well this caught my eye. I am not an adoptee but I was adopted when I was 1yr old and now I am 20. I have to say my parent's have always been honest with me about everything from the start. I grew up knowing I was adopted, but I never felt that my parent's loved me less or anything. I did go through a stage of wondering about my birth parent's but I never actively looked for them because I knew that my parent's were the ones who took me in and raised me. I think it would be worse for a child to never know, or to find out when they turned 18. If you are open with your child from the start, your child will feel like they can be more open with you. If you don't tell your child until a certain age they will feel hurt and like they have been decieved....Show more

My kids know all about my adoption and basically, could care less. I don't mean that rudely but I'm just mom. Whether I'm adopted or not doesn't affect them...that's the way they think anyway! lol
They are much more interested in their 1/2 brother I gave up 22 years ago...Show more

My kids know that I am adopted. They are only just old enough to begin understanding what that means:

Not too long ago, we accidentally happened upon a tv show about adoption while flipping channels. It opened the door for some conversation. When I confirmed that I was indeed adopted, my 9 year-old asked if I had been a really ugly baby. I think this shows how he really can't wrap his head around the idea of parents giving away their babies. THEN, he asked if "that" (adoption) could ever happen to him. And, I believe he was actually fearful. It seemed clear that he was thinking: if "that" can happen to mom...it could happen to me too. Of course, I told him that I would never, ever give him away because I simply loved him too much.

So, bottom line, I think my adoption scares my kids. Being given away for ever to strangers is the stuff of nightmares, if you ask me!...Show more

I'm not only adopted but I have two adopted children. They know as much about my adoption as they do about their own. By that I mean, they know the info I know. My oldest has her paperwork (as much as we had given the fact it was an international adoption) and my youngest, while just an infant, will know as much. Her baby book has her hospital info in it as well as her baby bands and anything else we had access to.

They think it's great naturally (at least the oldest one does, the youngest can't talk yet) and thus far it's been a positive experience for all involved. I don't see that changing either....Show more