This was a question that was taken down for a while and has been reinstated. If you click the link it will take you there. Some have emailed me that they thought it was a good question and that they really wanted to read ALL of the answers but did not get a chance. I just wanted to let people know it was back and that all of the answers are there if they wanted to get back in there and read them.
I'm happy for you that you got this reinstated and appealed. I've given up appealing anything because it's been so obvious that a couple of trolls that we all know have reported my responses to their provoking questions.
I think this was a realistic and appropriate question. How dare anyone who isn't adopted feel that these kinds of adoptee experiences should be pushed back under the rug rather than discussed.
In most cases of infant and international adoption, "chosen" is a harmful lie. With the waiting lists for babies, there is no choosing the child. You take what you get. It is the adoptive parents who are chosen in the vast majority of the cases of infant and international adoption. In many cases, the adoptive parents chose NOT to adopt available children (turn down a "situation") because they are "damaged" goods.
Adoption from foster might be different. I will read and appreciate the answers from foster/adopt parents.
All children should feel special. Surely, there is a more honest and less harmful way to make them feel that way
Lots of cowards on here, unfortunately that have nothing better to do than contest responses and questions. I think they just don't like what they read and decide to contact Yahoo.
Parents should help their children build positive self-esteem. But we must help them build it with truth and love. We do our children no favors by telling them they are princes or princess or "chosen" only to have them worried they will fall off their thrones if they aren't perfect.