So my son is about to turn six and he is acting up in school. He won't listen to the teacher while she talks. He refuses to do work most of the time. It's not that he doesn't know what he is doing because he is in the groups who read and write at the highest levels. I am wondering if it is too easy for him? One form of punishment at school is writing sentences. He will sit at the desk for as long as he can to avoid writing them. He also has been threatened to be held back. I have taken away his tv privileges and video game privileges. We have swatted his bottom for acting up. We have a monthly calender to show what color day he had (Green best, yellow okay, and red bad). We have told him that we can go buy a good toy if he can go the rest of the month without a red day. It hasn't worked yet. What other options do I have?
2009-04-02T06:08:56Z
Yes I have spent an entire afternoon with my son in the class. I didn't let him talk to me and I even made him ride the bus home. As for talking to him he always says that he doesn't know why he got red. Or that he just got red. He doesn't really talk about why he got red. He would rather come home and play. Which is hard because I know he needs outside time but I don't want him thinking that I am happy with the behavior. He asks if I am proud of him. I say I am proud of him but not of his behavior at school. He started to cry when I told him that so I think he understood that I was not too happy.
Anonymous2009-04-02T06:25:00Z
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Figure out WHY he doesn't want to do his work. Ask him why he refuses to do it. It may be too easy for him, but there's an even better chance that he doesn't know how to do it. Bring some of the work home and have him try to do it while he's at home. If he can do it with seemingly no issues, it's too easy for him. If he struggles, it's too hard. Either way, that is NO excuse for his behavior. Punish him harshly and push him to behave.
Does your school have a counselor? If so, I would put a call into them. They are trained on behavioral issues and might have some suggestions. I know people jump to the ADD or ADHD diagnosis right away, but it may just be a way to get attention for some reason. Does he have a large group of kids in his class? I would check out every other avenue first, but he is acting like my step-daughter was and the teachers classified her symptoms as ADHD. She was also 5 at the time. The reason I say check out all other possibilities first is she is now 14 and has been given probably just about every medicine/diagnosis there is however, she only misbehaves and acts out like that at her Mother's house and school is no longer a problem. My husband and I have no issues. Keep your chin up and don't give up.
I have been having the same problem with my first grader. They also have the green, yellow, and red system. Only one week all year did my son come home with green every day. I even bribed him with five dollars. He is a VERY well-behaved boy at home, with me rarely having to tell him twice to get something done. I do believe that my son's behavior reflects on the relationship that he has with his teacher. He likes her okay enough, but he doesn't respect her at all. She punishes him for really stupid reasons, like talking loudly at recess. I think that he feels defeated from the get go, and won't try as hard. My son's principal has even confided with me that he believes that he gets in trouble for very trivial reasons, but if she sets the rules they are supposed to follow them. I don't have the cure for your problem, but lately, I have concocted a punishment and reward system that seems to be working well. I assess the reason that he got yellow or red, and if it is legitimate........no toys, and extra chores if he gets red, no toys for yellow, and lots of praise for green. We set goals for something that he wants, and the bigger the item the more greens that he has to acquire. It seems to be working for the time being. Good luck. Keep trying, and you will find what works for him. Every child is different.
If my 8-year-previous is performing like a three-year-previous, including having a tantrum over something minor, then I tell him he's performing like a three-year-previous. So if a team of 4th graders are performing like 5-year-olds in school, i don't see a concern with a instructor telling them the reality...that they are performing like kindergarteners.
my daughter is in kindergarden too...and she acted crazy for a couple weeks...i ground her (take everything but the bed and her dresser out of her room) and she only comes out her room to potty or eat, then back in the room...she usually gets in in a day or two, if she does it again i repeat the process. If grounding doesn't work, it's resorting to a good ole fashioned whoopin, children need to be disciplined or they will take over. I also, i got her on a daily routine that actually helped out ALOT.