So, I'm having a hard time convincing myself somedays to ride. I have no doubt in my mind that my mare is the best part of my life, and that I want to spend every minute I can with her. I just don't want to ride anymore. I'm 16, is it normal/okay to feel like this?? I'm confused, and guilty. I feel bad for feeling like this, my mare doesn't deserve someone who doesn't want to ride her...
2009-06-14T15:54:28Z
I do a lot of schooling. I've put all the miles on my mare that she has, I got her 5 days undersaddle and I think now I'm just bored. I think I'm going to take a break from ringwork, and just do trails and relax. Then I'll be happier to get back on her. I like the bridleless idea too! I could never get rid of my mare, she's the only thing that keeps me alive half the time. (: Thanks guys. Made me feel better.
?2009-06-14T11:39:21Z
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I think this is normal. What type of riding do you do with your horse? Do you do shows or do you do trails?
I think maybe you're just a little "burn out" from too much ring work and showing. You should focus on riding to bond with your horse. Try doing more bareback riding, and try doing some trails. Think of riding as taking your dog for a walk- both of you can do it together and it can be good exercise and fun for both of you.
Maybe you should try training your horse to ride without tack- that could be a lot of fun and it wouldn't make you as tired of riding since it could be a great bonding activity. Stacy Westfall rides bridleless and she has a lot of good DVD sets that will help you learn. http://www.westfallhorsemanship.com/
Another thing to try with your horse is driving. If you don't want to ride, why not train your horse to pull a cart? This is hard to learn on your own so I suggest getting a qualified trainer to help you out.
Maybe you just don't like your riding discipline anymore. Try something new! What type of riding do you do now? There are literally dozens of activities that you and your horse might love... endurance, dressage, jumping, barrels, gymkhana, hunters, trail riding, paperchases... there's something out there for everyone, so why not try a new discipline and see if it makes you like riding any more?
Yes, it's normal and yes, it's ok. Passions in life ebb and flow. You'll go through phases where you don't enjoy the things you once loved, and resurgences of the joy and excitement you once felt. As you grow up and try new things, sometimes you find those new things more interesting than the old. Sometimes life gets complicated and you just don't have the time or energy to do fun stuff. If you really love horses and riding, the fun will come back and it will always be there (although sometimes hidden).
Don't feel bad, it happens. Take a break. Your horse isn't going to die or be any worse for wear with a few months off. If you find that you still don't want to ride her after those few months, consider in-barn leasing her. You'll still have her around to love on and spend time with, but someone else will exercise her.
I know how you feel. I go through bouts of "down time" when I just don't have anything to do with horses for about four days and then I get right back into it ready with my game face.
Something I do is I will get my iPod and go for a ride on my bike around the neighborhood and just think and get my priorities straight. It always helps me...
Something you can do to get excited about it again is:
Take her to a show! You can rent a stall for a day and just school her in the warm up arenas and not enter any classes (unless you want). Just being able to ride somewhere new and see competition should help.
Or you can take her out on trails and maybe gallop in an open pasture.
Or you can create a lesson plan (I do this) and write down everything you want to do in the order you want it done and have someone read it off to you through out your lesson. This will set goals for you and when you accomplish them through out your lesson you will feel...well...accomplished!
I mean read up on a topic such as tack, equine illnesses, behavior etc and apply it to the care of her...it will help.
There's nothing wrong with having a break from riding. Let your horse have a nice rest and just go down and see her and bond with her on the ground. If you like doing that then cut riding for now. It'll do her good to have a break from it all and have a chance to really be a horse. Horses don't give a heck if we don't ride them - she'll love the opportunity to have a good rest from it all, it does any good to have a few months off once in a while.
One day you'll really miss and want to get back on board, and then it'll be better than ever because both you guys will have had a good break and you'll both be feeling good and excited about starting again.
i felt EXACTLY like this with my arab gelding, i read your other quetion to do wiht your mare acting up and this is why. My arab wouldnt stop, wouldnt jump over 2ft, i couldnt hack out, he was scared of everything. Now dont get me wrong i loved him to pieces, his temprement was so sweet so soft, all the yard used to come and see him in his stable coz he was such a lovely character. i used to go down from dawn till duusk everyday but would only ride once maybe twice a week. HE had put me off riding. HE had made me lose confidence. and when i watched every1 else jumping proper and hacking and having fun generally i realised it was him , not me. And i sent him back (he was a full loan horse) I recently rode my friends arab whos relly well behaved and i was scared out of my mind to jump to canter to just trot. I was convinced ever horse was naughty. NOW i can say im back to my VERY confident self, jumping 3ft 6, galloping outside, and getting on any horse.
I know you love your mare, and im not saying give her up, as this isnt for everyone. But it worked for me. Perhaps you could: Full loan her to someone to school her to a capable ability for you (not saying you cant manage but its obviously offputting) Part loan her so someone very experienced can ride her more and you can ride her when shes calmer and shell come on more RIDE a sensible horse as much aas you can to bring your confidence levels back up,. Or sell her Or if you can afford two, get a plod/safe horse and ride both to get confidence up.