Is it bad to hide money from my fiance if it's for emergencies, for me or both of us?

He can't ever save money! Well he can save it for rent, but as soon as he knows there's extra he wants to go out to eat, buy stuff neither of us needs, etc. On this last paycheck my boss surprised me with a vacation I did not know was paid! I have $150 he does not know about. I want to save it for emergencies, but the thing is we have some kind of emergency every month, but we always scrape by... we're soooo poor though; we've had our power turned off so many times and had the landlord gives us "3-day pay-or-vacate"s every other month... he knows it's his fault I think which is why he always comes up with the money, but not till the last minute!
We have alot of debt of course, but I'm afraid if we had a truly unexpected big emergency (like one of the places we owe money to starts garnishing wages, one of us wrecks the car, we get evicted and need a ridiculous down payment to get into a new apartment, the dog needs surgery...) he will not be able to pull it off. Plus the very last time we broke up that was why! We got evicted and neither of us had anywhere else to go, except he was invited to stay at a place where I was not welcome so he went there and I had to stay in hell with my mother for 3 months. I had to beg her! If it happens again I'd rather be homeless. So there are personal reasons too, but if it means getting both of us out of huge trouble I would use it.
I think if the roles were reversed and he pulled money out of his butt to save us, or even himself, I wouldn't be too angry just grateful. What would you think?

abbieneale19892010-09-24T15:54:52Z

Favorite Answer

I think you have every right to save it, its your money lol :)

It's there to help, and if they are bad with money you have even more of a reason to save in secret :)

Cos money just burns holes in some peoples pockets, if you are sensible enough to save, then well done :)

Classy Granny2010-09-25T05:45:29Z

Whatever you do, keep your money separate from his. With all the problems you've already had are you sure this is the man you want to spend the rest of your life with? No need to tell him you have $150 stashed

Anonymous2010-09-24T15:55:52Z

I don't know why you are with him is what I think. But if you are going to continue to be with him and even marry him, then I suggest you keep no secrets, at least not as big as having money. But just because you have money doesn't mean you have to give it to him or spend it as he sees fit. So tell him you have the money but it stays with you.

Sharon T2010-09-24T15:59:13Z

Is this the way you want to live the rest of your life? You really should keep your money separate and give some thought to living alone. This man shows no signs he will ever change and be a very poor influence on children.

Ariann2010-09-24T15:54:06Z

noo.. as long as u use it for a good thing. its completely fine if you do this. ur thinking about the both of you. just make sure to not do anything crazy with the money