Let me start off by listing our most pressing problems:
Me (wife): Very insecure about myself and lack creativity. I'm open to try new thing but I lack the confidence to initiate. I also like to plan ahead. Mostly to help with the confidence. If I plan something out and rehearse it in my head, I get more confidence. We also have a child, so all of that hurts the "spontaneous" aspect.
Husband: Prude, lacks desire (but tries very hard for me) and has some confidence issues, feels a lot of pressure from me.
On our most recent discussion we uncovered he needs variety, instead of the same stuff all the time. We're pretty conservative, so bringing in other people is out of the question, so no suggesting that. lol
I've been trying to do some new things, for example, the last couple times I've tried focusing more on a hand job instead of ******** (which I prefer), and I also dressed up in a school-girl skirt he likes. But I need more ideas. He's reluctant to role play. He doesn't like foreplay. He's uncomfortable talking about it, although he is making the effort.
What other things can we try? What are some of your favorite things/positions/ etc?
Anonymous2010-11-01T19:38:59Z
Favorite Answer
Do not feel alone. I too feel insecure and lack that creative gene. lol. But, my husband and I do have a good sex life, and that is because we try new things (within reason, no other ppl, nothing scary). We started out just by trying new positions. Sometimes, a different angle will provide different, and often pleasurable results. Check out this site from COSMO with some great tips on spicing up your sex life. GOOD LUCK!!!!
P.S. The tips on this site use explicit detail, so just be prepared. :-)
The age old issue of sex - if you have barriers, preconceived ideas and plans then your sex will be boring. Children can be a handicap if you let them become one. Imagination, fantasy, dreams together with an open mind and time can turn boring to exciting very quickly. Change things - where, when and how. Be Provocative, wear sexy clothes during the day, go naked, have sex in the morning, lunchtime, whenever. Watch porn but also be spontaneous, use edible foods, drink champagne and remove your inhibitions. Wake him up with oral sex and dare him to do it to you as well. Get some sex magazines and read them together and you need to talk about it and learn together. Tonight, wear only one piece of clothing and flaunt yourself to him and once he starts wanting to get on with it - challenge him to do something different - oral, kissing, stroking you. It will eventually break down the barriers. There are some very good sexy adult games available - I don't know if the one that we used regularly is still available - it was called "Loser" I think. It was a fun game with various challenges and if you lost you had to carry out whatever was on the card that you picked up. It is designed for more than 2 players but we found it fun playing it as a couple. To get a long term fix you need to do it together.
Okay- this may end up a little hot in here but this will be good for you to try...
Okay, while you are dressed up in your school girl out fit- make sure though it is a short shirt and a white top that is tied (high with two buttons button) then stand there holding a whip in your hands standing there with one leg bent and the other one straight then while holding the whip in your hands tap it and say to your man "You, have been a very bad boy, and now I think it is time that make you pay" then you will use the whip and spank him on his behind; make sure not to do it to hard though. You, then are going to use two pairs of handcuffs and you are going to cuff each hand of yours to the headboard of your bed.
Then while you are doing that make sure you have candles lit at the same time. Once you have your man all tied up and done. Rub your hand up and down his chest down to the man hoods tease him some where he can picture in his mind on what is going to be taking place. While you are doing this kissing on him crap the candle and pour just a little bit of the wax onto his chest. While you are doing this you know he is loving it- then get him not frontwards either you are going to spin yourself the other way around (that way it goes in deeper) ride him like you've never done before, say things to him like you never done before make him feel like he has never done... You, do this it will be a night you two will never forget
Play that you are the maid cleaning up the bedroom while he is in it, wear the appropriate costume that leaves your bits highly accessible.
Get naked, hand hubby a feather, put on a blindfold and lay on the bed, tell hubby to tickle you with the feather in various spots without telling you where it will be.
Hand hubby some shaving cream, a razor and some lotion. Tell him you want him to try going smooth and bare and should shave you....yes there!
RE: New ideas for in the bedroom.....? Let me start off by listing our most pressing problems:
Me (wife): Very insecure about myself and lack creativity. I'm open to try new thing but I lack the confidence to initiate. I also like to plan ahead. Mostly to help with the confidence. If I plan something out and rehearse it in my...