I'm very conflicted. What would you do?
I just want some opinions. It's a bit of a read, but your opinions would really help a person who is terribly conflicted.
What would you do in this case:
You're a shy person and you don't really get out enough and to top it off, you do have a couple social anxiety issues, so your social life as it stands sucks. Well,recently you've been getting lonely and wanting companionship, namely of the opposite sex. In other words, you want a boyfriend/girlfriend.
Well, time passes and you get frustrated and terribly stressed because you sit around and don't actively pursue anyone due to your anxieties but as luck would have it, you meet someone. The catch is, you meet them online and they live 1200 miles away.
You hit it off and in the end want to meet and be with each other but can't due to several variables. One such variable is money; neither of you have much of it and that what you do have is needed to pay off bills or just get by living on. Another variable is that even if you had the money, you have obligations that force you to stay where you are. Their obligation is schooling with their course of study only being offered at their school, and yours is house sitting indefinitely with animals that you have to watch.
At first, you're fine with the way things are but after a fairly long amount of time, it's not enough. You want something that's real and physical, not just emotional. You want to meet them, but know at most you and they would only be with each other for a couple weeks, if that, and you know that would never be enough. But you also believe strongly, that some day soon, you will meet, and that you may start dating them if things worked out. Online and long distance relationships don't work according to either of your beliefs as well.
These such thoughts kind of haunt you because you don't know the future, and don't know if or when you'll meet and the building frustration of no significant other stresses you continuously.
So it comes down to the following questions: First: Do you live with your stress, frustration and loneliness in chances that you'll meet or do you throw away what you have with the person you met online and risk being completely alone due to your social problems on top of knowingly crushing their heart? Second: If you decide to stick with the person, then would you risk everything, both your own life and meager, but secure financial stability just to move to their area, or just to visit them a few times? Third: Do you try and overcome your social anxieties and date anyways outside of their (your internet love interest's) knowledge? Fourth: Do you still date even if you feel it would be cheating on your internet love interest, or if you know it would hurt them to find out, or if you do meet, risk losing them due to you being in a relationship with someone else? Fifth: Why did you choose what you chose for your answers?
Thanks for reading it and leaving your opinion (if you did).