Almost all High Schools look alike. Everyone can picture it in their head without much help. That's why the only description of one that I used was:
"The building stood two stories high, built with tan bricks. A stadium on the far side had a picture of a green zombie-like monster with words too dark to read overhead. Two lights hung underneath the overhead ceiling of the exterior entryway."
But I received a critique that it's not enough. I don't know if there are any architectural terms to describe a school. I'm not an architect. And describing it is extremely difficult for me.
How should I describe your basic two story high school?
2012-01-20T10:11:14Z
Let me reiterate. How would you describe the exterior of a high school. Not the interior.
2012-01-20T10:11:29Z
Let me reiterate. How would you describe the exterior of a high school. Not the interior.
Steven J Pemberton2012-01-20T10:37:05Z
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I would have to ask whether this critic knows what they're talking about. That strikes me as plenty of description. You're trying to tell a story, not get an A from your English teacher for showing you know how to write detailed description.
Through whose eyes are you showing the school? A new student or one who's been there some time? People don't really see the things they walk past every day. If your character has been at the school for a while, what you've written might be too much description. You can get around it by having something new or different for the character to notice, that makes them look again at what they see every day.
When I described the high school in my story I did in by a tour. My MC is new to the school (cliche I know =P) and needed to get to know the place, so I made her walk around with a teacher used that opportunity to describe what the school looks like.
EDIT: Oh I'm with you. I'd start with the major details such as the brick colour to start setting the scene, and as you go on through the following chapter you add to it, like describe how the fields and so on are laid out, where stadiums are. You'll be gradually building a map in your reader's head, and you can describe as your character visits those places rather than lumping the descriptions of everything together.
Utter chaos. Noise, noise, noise. Most of the boys are trying to draw as much attention to themselves as possible. Look, here I am, I have arrived in the cafeteria. Thank you, TV
The girls are playing thier incomprehensible catty games. Some are actually eating lunch.