Can You Tell Me How This Gets Handled?

Question

My son Jason (33) went with his wife Abbey (25) to Tennessee for a 4 day mini-vacation.  An arguement broke out in their cabin & he hit her.  She ran away.  He went to find her & got pulled over & arrested for a DUI.  He told them what occured & the police found Abbey.  Then they charged him also with domestic battery.  Since they are not from Tennessee but from Indiana, how does the Tennessee court handle this?  This happened last night 2/23/13.  He is scheduled to go to court Monday morning 2/25/13.  Will he have to pay to get released or will he need to go back there for court or will the judge give him like so much time in the county jail?  We have no idea if he will lose his 12 yr. job here in Indiana or if he will have a way to contact his work for time off.  Plz.  do NOT make remarks as we know he did VERY wrong.  His wife has continually scratched & clawed him, spit at him, she is a very abusive person.  She has gotten in all our families face & screamed "Hit me, just hit me!"  We kept telling our son that she has anger issues & to plz. get away from her but he loves her.  She attacked my husband one evening & when I stepped in front of her she took my cell phone & threw it at my 65 yr old husbands head!  She is such a violent person.  Our son has never been arrested before so I have no idea what to expect.  And if anyone says that a man should never hit a woman....well if you knew Abbey you can only take so many hits with objects & punches from her until you feel like snapping.  So sad!  She has told me for 2 yrs. now that she knows she has anger issues & needs counseling but now it's gotten our son in trouble.  He will pay the price but we have no idea what to expect & how Tennessee works something like this.  Thank you for your time.

Robert · Accepted Answer

In most states to hit an elder is an automatic aggravated felony assault.Yelling screaming and threatening elders/disabled person is felony intimidation/ assault. Hitting him with a phone is aggravated felony assault with a weapon.Next time have a cell phone with a camera when she comes around. Missy sounds like a piece of work. Your son hit her, he is guilty. If she hits him first so is she but he had to file charges on her as well.There is no such thing in the law as justifiable battery.Although self defense is a defense if and only if you can prove you had no choice but to strike another person to extricate yourself from the situation. He was pursuing her when he was arrested and told the police so. So that negates that defense.He will  pay a fine and/or probation and get a possible jail sentence. First offenses at his age will be marked up to stuff happens but he will be punished. Beyond probation as he has time served, if Abbey admits she assaulted him first, likely he will pay a fine court costs and get possible probation.Abbey not showing up does not always work towards dismissal.It could backfire. The judge could see that as fear of your son. Abbey needs to step up.She has to say to the court that she relentlessly kicked scratched and punched him, if she did, and forced him to hit her.If, he had remorse for hitting her and was looking for her, he has a limited excuse for DUI because of the particular circumstances.
Excuses are not a valid legal defense but are always taken into account. The law does not care, the judge might.Just cross your fingers there are no mandatory sentences involved. How drunk he was by level will factor into judges decision. 
You are a great mom and you should not be ashamed. Best of luck!

slammamama · Answer

He will have to return for court, of course. He will have to post a bond to be released and return for trial. If she isn't there to testify the charges may well be dismissed. 

It doesn't matter if she's abusive. He hit her, period. If she hit him, he could have her charged, too.You should have had her arrested when she threw the phone. That would be elder abuse, even more serious a charge  bc your husband is 65.

Your son has made the choice of living with a dangerous woman. If he loses his job, sad to say, that's part of the price he pays for staying with her. If convicted of domestic abuse, he'll get probation and a fine. He can do probation in his home state.

 The DUI  laws don't vary enormously from state to state. first offenders with blood alcohol levels under .20  have to do 48 hours in jail, which he could do over a weekend, pay fines, lose his license a year, have an alcohol assessment and complete a program, depending on its outcome. 

If he gets into a court-ordered counseling program he may just learn that it's best for him to consider his marriage a lost cause and get out before she kills him. Hopefully, something good will come of this.

Can You Tell Me How This Gets Handled?

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