Aside from the obvious, what do you find attractive when you look at a guy/girl? What catches your attention first? And once you get to know a person, like after the initial meeting do you find most attractive? What makes you decide whether or not you want to be in a relationship with a specific person and would you stay with a person even after the rush of chemicals fizzles out?
I am currently in a (wonderful) relationship, but I was just curious because I want to know what other people look for and how they deal with, you know all that stuff.
Anonymous2014-01-31T03:11:45Z
Favorite Answer
I like someone who won't annoy me. Who smells nice and puts effort into our dates. Someone who wants to see me and text me all the time, no matter what's on tv. Someone who can make me laugh or smile even if we're fighting. Someone who will shout at me when I need it. Someone who will argue with me but still listen to what I have to say. Someone who can admit I'm right but know when he's onto something. A guy who can take control and plan dates. Haha. I have a longer list.
A nicer car is definitely a plus for me.. but just because im a clean freak and i dont like seeing or sitting on dirt and stuff, if i really care for him i would not care what his car looked like... but if i wasnt that interested AND he had a hoopty... i wouldnt talk to him probably, and the car just needs to be decent... like a 1995 corolla or something is perfectly fine if its clean... its more of a dirt issue with me, as to why i would prefer them to have a nice car.
Sounds like you are questioning your relationship, or he is...
Imagine yourself firstly, without this person. How does it make you feel? Free? Alive? Sad? Alone?
Back to answer some questions. What catches my(woman) attention first, appearance. And I say appearance which is slightly different from looks because Iooks are more exact like "blonde, blue eyes.. etc" no I mean appearance, like weighting options... he doesn't have to rock hard abs but he can't be over-weight...
For me I tend to weight my options I use to be very narrow minded and had my 'dream' man await for me..but being single for over 4 years and finally in a relationship of 1 and half years its def opened my eyes, ears, heart and mind.
I use to be all about a man's appearance first like I said but as I've gotten older (27) I see men completely different. I look at their mannerism and how they present themselves first. How do they carry themselves. Posture, walk, talk, eye movement, etc. I can spot a dork a mile away. I can also tell just by observing who is shy, extrovert, confident/humble, overly confident (cocky), and just someone that keeps themselves not necessarily shy. For me , I like a guy that has an innocence presence that puts on a show, meaning he isn't showing off for a public display of people but he is showing off just for me. Showing he is interested, or at least I feel like it does. Then I like the hard shell type that you can feel has some soft spots because he isn't afraid of conversation. The conversation is very important because if it isn't flowing then there will never be a relationship. He has to listen and you have to notice he listens same goes for I. I like a guy that shows me hes interested not just by showing off to me but by asking me questions. It shows that he wants to get to know me and work hard to understand who I am as a person and woman.
Now, don't get me wrong, appearance still matters. Though, a guy can be an average joe and turn into prince charming in a conversation. If I find out hes smart, funny, common interests, and conversation flows naturally. He's got my attention.
I met my boyfriend over a year and half ago and hes a guy I would have never have even given a chance if you asked me when I was in college. All I wanted was the bad boy the one that was so destroyed because of his parents or whatever that all I wanted to do was to fix him and make him see that love is more powerful than drugs and sex and such. Anyways... my bf is younger than me.. and at first I didn't know this until after getting to know him otherwise. Once I found out it didn't even matter because he proved himself to act and come across older than myself. We love each other which is very important to know in a relationship that both of us equally love each other. The hard part is find out if the love is equally the same amount. The way to find that out is rather complex but you start to see it specially if you are the woman. We like to over analysis everything so here we go:
If you two live together this may not work... but try it anyways
If he is the first one to get in touch with you or are you always the one txting/calling him?
If he tells you that he'll call you right when he gets home and "forgets" to until hes basically done with his day/night
If he doesn't cuddle or affectionately touch you to show that he cares
If he doesn't sit close to you
If hes on the phone with friends in front of you instead of easily walking into another room or returning the call some other time (just rude)
theres more but you get the point...
To keep a relationship going is to really see yourself with this person for future goings... or putting yourself in the situation of breaking up and seeing yourself without this other person. Think of it this way, love might not be enough to keep a relationship strong but the little things do... and if he forgets to hold your hand in public, well go on and grab it, if he hasn't complimented you in 2 weeks well dress up and make sure you look good and make him say something...
A woman wants to feel special. A man wants to feel wanted. So, its a two way street and in a relationship to keep it strong you got to do things that you two use to do like how you first met what attracted you two to each other. Spice up the bedroom if you know what I mean by getting creative (look online/magz/such). Think of sweet things to do for him that he would appreciate a lot and hopefully return the favor ;)