Is there a way to do that while making morality neither self-serving nor arbitrary?
Did I make a mistake here? So many are answering the question as if I asked how Christians parents instill moral values.
WOOWHO
How do secular or atheist parents go about Instilling moral values into their Children
, Instilling defined as Gradually but firmly establishing an Idea or attitude in a persons mind That is odd if you just look up the definition of INSTILL it tells you how it is done . called repetitive teaching.
The other clue is humans have some specific innate characteristics . very well demonstrate in primate research a innate sense of Fairness. equality . empathy and compassion .
why because humans have emotions the ability to feel for another human being .and their welfare as well as their own .and
Morality is based on Reason. Evidence ( cause / effect / consequence also learned ) Empathy rules based on principles that establish and maintain human and animal well being
Derrick
It is pretty much the same as it is for anybody else, your children model their behaviour based on what they see from you (and their peers and society at large).
If you want your children to know that violence (especially killing) is wrong, then you live your life in a non-violent manner as well and when they see violence and killing (i.e. on the news) you discuss with them so that they can come to an understanding about why it is wrong.
If you want your children to be honest, then be honest to them and explain to them why lying is wrong. If you want to express why stealing is bad you explain about personal property and how they would feel if somebody were to take their things.
Really it is all on the job training, you learn as you go and address situations as they arise. If you foster logic and reason your children will be able to employ critical thinking to determine what is right or wrong and understand why that is the case. Understanding the why is paramount, if they are simply following rules because they were told those were the rules then they aren't really developing moral values.
Anonymous
How do secular or atheist parents go about instilling moral values into their children?
---- By using virtue ethics. Which predate all modern religions.
Is there a way to do that while making morality neither self-serving nor arbitrary?
---- No morality is as capricious, incoherent, contradictory, arbitrary, and self-serving as religious morality.
The central message of religious morality is that "morals have nothing to do with morality."
Campbell Hayden
The origins of "Moral Values" are not based in 'theology' ....
therefore, there is no need for anything more than good Parenting,
and positive education, to create the incorruptable ethics that a child will need to become an upstanding adult.
Perhaps *your* parents will teach you the ethics of choosing *Best Answer*
for all of the people who have taken the time to answer questions that you've posted --- That would be nice.
Anonymous
You know I'm not sure but somehow I've managed to raise two wonderful, moral children who are charitable, kind, loving, fair, and helpful to others. And as amazing as that sounds, my wife and I did it all without a promise of an imaginary place in the sky or threatening them with a place of eternal suffering. I'd like to think we did it by setting a good example for them, I guess.