Baby ultimatum. GF wants baby now...?

Normally I'd say you should tell her to wait.

But...early 40s is well into the increased risk age for some pretty major problems. You both need to sit down and talk it through. You don't have time to spend together as a couple first, like you would have if she was 25. You need to make a decision. Are you going to be ready to have a baby in the next year or so or not? If not, you need to tell her now, because that's effectively telling her she can never have a kid with you. You don't have a lot of time to decide. Why did you think you would have?

If you need six months, then tell her so. If you need six years, your relationship is over.

I'm think she has raised a huge red flag. While I understand her clock is ticking, she should not be pushing you into this decision. You are right, you don't yet know her well enough to make such a life altering decision with her. There are so many things that you have yet to learn about each other. What if you do have the baby and find that your parenting styles don't coincide or that you just flat out aren't suited for each other? I suggest you find a way to show her that you are serious about your relationship, but that you don't have to have a baby immediately to prove it. If she refuses to except that then maybe you should rethink the relationship. You don't want to spend the rest of your life with a woman who is going to give you an ultimatum every time she doesn't get her way.

First of all I think it is very selfish of her to try and push you into something like this. Yes her clock is ticking, well she has had 40 years to have a baby and why should you be the one to have to stop the clock? It will be life changing for both of you and if your not ready, don't do it. You said it yourself, you havent been together that long. My mother in law just had a baby at 45. So maybe if she can be patient enough to see if you guys will last at least a year she will only be just hitting 40 and maybe you will be more apt to helping her out with this. Who knows, you might even get married or whatever in a years time. I hope the best for you. Good luck.

The best thing you can do is sit her down and tell her how you feel. I would tell her that you aren't ready for a baby and she can either wait until you feel you are ready, or she can find a sperm donor somewhere else. I know that sounds mean, but she is giving you an ultimatum and you should do the same. She is being pretty selfish and needs to realize that it takes two in a relationship and being a parent is something that should happen with time.

I would definately not do it if you're having doubts about it. You have to think about when you have a child with someone, you're tied to that person the rest of your life. You've only been with her 4 months so you really don't know each other. Just don't rush into anything. Also, think about the child. What if things don't work out between you two. The child is being raised in a single parent home. I would say at least wait a year.

To me it sounds like all she wants is a sperm donor...not a boyfriend/husband/relationship.

If this is the way she is going to be, then I would move on if I were you. You dont need someone throwing out ultimadiums like that, especially when you are not even ready to get married! 4 months is not long enough.

She obviously doesnt care about being a single mother, so tell her to get in the car, drive down to the sperm donor centre, and by the time she is back, your stuff will be packed and out. She if she cares, and if she doesnt, it just shows what she is out there to get.

Only 4 months? That does seem a little soon for her to make you prove your commitment to her by bringing a child into the picture.

Remember that she can still adopt years from now when she is no longer able to have children. In other words, it can wait.

Tell her that you're not ready and you feel that its too soon. if she doesn't accept that, you may have to let her go.

You have only known her 4 months. DON'T DO IT! You should know her at least a year and live with her first. She may be a freak, and wanting a baby after that little amount of time might be an indication of that.

4 months is not a long time to know someone. You shouldn't be forced into having a child. You should have one when you are ready. I think you might have to walk away. It sounds like your feelings weren't even considered in any of this and now she is forcing you into it or you lose her? That doesn't seem right.

Your only two choices are. Go for it,and do something that you're not ready to do based on threats. Or end the relationship because neither of you is on the same page and most likely will never be.

I'd do the latter.