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How to motivate a 13 year old to do well in Jr. High?
I sure could use come ideas here! My 13 year old son is doing horrible in 7th grade (Jr. High)! It's not that he's stupid; he's far from it. Even he admits he's lacking motivation or the want to. I've talked, I've yelled, I've taken away the computer and his video games, assigned extra chores. It's the same thing, he promises to do better, manages to get the grades up to passing for report cards and then falls apart again.
Any ideas on how to get this kid to get motivated? I am seriously considering holding him back a year because apparently he is not mature nor responsible enough to handle the less structured learning environment of Jr. High.
He's never been a good student even though he is more than capable. He does have a non-verbal learning issue but it's not that severe and we have worked and worked with him as to the best things for him to do to make learning easier for him. I'm just not seeing any effort at all and if he does make an effort, it's 1/2 hearted.
Any ideas? I sure could use some. I'm about to "show" him what kinds of jobs you get without an education and have him spend a morning shoveling manure at a friends farm...... Should I?
4 Answers
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
rugged...
You know my entire life I was the exact same way... until I got in to highschool, what turned me around was football...
It sounds really odd and far fetched but I was so busy all the time soon I started enjoying being busy...
Maybe your child lacks ambition because hes bored, I would say that was my case, the "whats the point..." attitude.
You could make him shovel manure if you like, but I dont see why that has to be a punishment, the kids growing up on the farms do it without it being a punishment, and if thats the worst that your child will encounter, I would say that hes destine for problems that will occur later in life because of dissapointments.
You dont want to sugar coat anything for children, its better they learn from the very beginning how horrible life is going to be, unless your rich and are sure you can bail him out and baby him his entire life... dont hold nothing back.
My dad tried beating me, he tried grounding, he tried everything....
Nothing works... Its up to the kid, just put the tools there for them...
Encourage him to be as busy as possible, once he feels associated he will develope his own standards... after school programs, sports programs are spendy and time consuming BUT!!! they are worth it.
It will also prevent him later on down the line from doing other things kids ought not to be doing. I watched my fellow class mates founder in to a world of Meth, But my whole football team, I would say the worst ever happened to them getting caught drinking... or maybe a speeding ticket... Some of the others rocking some harsh prison time now for possession and stuff..
the key to a childhood is to be busy all the time, and if you got a kid being a lil lazy, make him get off his butt, and get busy. Chores are great, give him a chore that he can self identify with, something that at the end he can say, wow I do this better than most people - theres pride... after pride comes the thirst for more, kids of all natures need or want attention in some way shape or form even if they act like they dont.
Good luck to you, and i hope the best for your childs future
- ?Lv 45 years ago
She needs to be on a stricter schedule. For instance, she should have somewhat of a set routine when she gets home. She needs to do ___ and ___ before she can watch tv, play, talk on the phone, etc. If she doesn't have these things [which should include chores and homework] done by supper, then she cannot do the list of privileges AFTER supper, either, and no going anywhere in the evening. Then the next day you start over again. If she is not allowed to do anything she really WANTS to do until she does what she NEEDS to do, then she will hopefully obey more consistently.
- 1 decade ago
Look what your doing is scaring him. I'm 13 and if you took away the computer it would only make me angry and annoyed...far from motivation if you ask me.
Yelling also is a shi*% technique. I would know. You develop this thing in your mind where you start substituting the words with "blahs"
selective hearing i think its called
Take him to a place were they feed homeless people make him understand that knowledge is a key to a good life.
I suppose my parents never really had to motivate me to study cause I already know the effects of bad grades.
