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ketchupklf
Lv 6
ketchupklf asked in Pregnancy & ParentingParenting · 1 decade ago

Youth group doesn't travel safely...?

My oldest son has just crossed over into the 'youth group' years and went on his first youth group overnight last night. Now I had heard from friend's kids about how unsafe the van trip up was... but I decided to give them the benefit of the doubt... particularly because my son (12yrs) even *asked* if everyone wore seatbelts on the trips (he knows his mama) and was told they now *did* by the youth minister.

They not only didn't wear seatbelts... they were laying all over the seats/floor, climbing over seats and turned around backwards. They kept telling my son he didn't have to wear his belt if he didn't want to... *that is illegal* at his age and at many of theirs!

Here they legally must wear a belt if they are under 15 yrs... the kids in my son's class (so, his age) were not. Front seat riders must all wear belts... they did not.

I am *not* letting this rest... I'm just deciding how far and where to take it. I plan to talk to the youth minister first tonight... but I understand others have had this conversation with him and clearly nothing has changed. I wonder if I should bring this up to our church's elders... I mean, shouldn't someone *hired* to look after the teens do it *legally*? <sigh> I hate confrontation... but I won't put my son in that van again unless I have some serious assurances that this is not going to happen again!

Any thoughts on what I should say/do and who I should take this to?

Update:

(when the other teens encouraged *my son* not to wear his belt...)

Update 2:

Anticipating questions... the youth minister sat right next to my son (another adult drove)... no seat belt. When the other teens encourged him not to wear his belt the youth minister said it was 'ok' if he did.

Update 3:

One thing that really makes this whole thing bizarre to me is a member of our congregation was kill just a couple of years back in an accident where a seatbelt would have most likely saved her life. Two of her daughters were in that van! <sigh> Why oh why do *I* have to be the one to bring this up? Don't any of the other adults who I *know* are aware of this have a voice at all?

6 Answers

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  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    This would really upset me.

    Esp. in this day & age when we know for a fact that seatbelts save lives. There is no reason on earth for anyone no matter what age not put on a seatbelt.

    I would go up to the church and talk to the pastor/preacher myself. Let them know how you feel. Tell them "My son enjoys the youth group here & so do. But honestly I don't feel they travel very safely."

    It may help to call other parents and talk to them too. It may be a bigger impact in having a bunch of parents confront them instead of just one.

    You are totally right and good for you for not letting this rest. We had the same issue with our inlaws. They told our kids they didn't need to wear a seat belt driving to church which was just down the road. But we told our kids "You are old enough to put on your own seat belt & I expect you do to that for your own safety."

    My son who is now 8 is very outspoke and my father in law told me of the lecture my son gave HIM on seatbelt safety. I got tears in my eyes thankful I taught him well but also laughed at how my father in law said 'You know? He was right." lol

    Source(s): homeschooling mom of 3
  • FREDERICK F. M
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    The confrontation will be a lot worse if someone loses a child in an accident due to his negligence. Now that you know of the dangers you have an obligation to approach this on two fronts. 1) the safety of the children, their lives are on the line on the road, and 2) the youth minister may be showing the kids that they don't have to listen to anybody, or pay attention to safety for themselves or the others. This is deadly serious. Take care of business. Take care of the children.

    Source(s): I have been in 2 fatal car wrecks as a young kid. 2 babysitters died due to drunk driving and drivers on the road.
  • ?
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    you're a smart woman! chatting with the greater youthful human beings minister is step one, yet whilst that hasn't worked, get another mum and dad in touch, and the elders or church council. The church ought to get into serious concern if any pupils have been injured or killed as subsequently of this negligence. Make adequate noise and that they are going to ought to hearken to you. ultimately, if that doesn't artwork, you're able to ought to alter church buildings--and verify the church is conscious why.

  • Brandon
    1 decade ago

    Volunteer to go along to help chaperone, be the one who enforces the seat belt usage. Make it a rule. Get involved. Do it for the good of the other kids as well, and have fun! Be a good influence in their lives.

  • mercy me
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    take it up with the main pastor. that is not acceptable. i would never let my kids go to something like that if the pastor didnt take good care of them. something bad could happen

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    that his ridiculous. If I were you I would take it as far as you could. Go to whoever you could and give them as much crap as you could. I would never put my kid back into that van

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