Do I want in or do I want out? Ugh!?

Question

There are so many things I love about my boyfriend and so many things about him that annoy the hell out of me and make me angry. For the past few months I have been trying to decide if I really want to be with him. My personal debate has been going on in my mind constantly. One day I tell myself that it's time to end it. Then the next day I find myself lying in his arms thankful that I have him. Back and forth. Back and forth. I just wish I knew for sure what would happen if he left. 

Anyway about an hour ago he did something that made me very angry and I just blurted out that I want him to move out. And he just sat there looking at the tv not saying anything. The longer I sat there waiting for his response the more upset I got so I came upstairs. He still didn't come up to say anything!

Does that mean he agrees? Isn't he even gonna try to fight it?? Now I'm sitting here wondering if I should take it back and tell him to stay or if I should just let it go and see what he does. So...what do you think I should do? Cuz I never really came up with my decision of whether I want him or not. So confused!

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Actually, this is kind of typical in a lot of marriages.

He will probably not come up to try to make amends because most men are not like that.

You need to manage him, the way wives have been learning to do for years.

Basically, a man will never respond to a complaining, yelling woman.  They respond, if they truly love you, to kindness.  A man who loves a woman wants to please her (within reason).  So try a more humble approach.  Rub his shoulders.  Tell him you are sorry for carrying on.  Praise him for the good things he does.  That helps a lot.  Then ask him to help you do something and graciously thank him.  After practicing kindness for awhile-without strings-then you can ask him for ideas on how you two can be a better team.  I am sure he has thoughts of his own but is reluctant to offer his two cents probably because he doesn't want you to go off, in a fight.
Whatever you do, don't put him on the defensive.  Give lots of strokes, then a decent man will give his very heart to you.

Lauren · Answer

ok hun i am in exactly the same position, i walked out of our flat after he annoyed me last night and stayed at my mums to not much of a reaction. i had been thinking whether to do it or not (because i do love him) so what i think you should do is give him some space. Or have some time to yourself and think about what you want. Maybe if your meant to be together space would help, and he might realise he should treat you better and not make you so angry x x x i wish you luck but you have to decide whats right for you

Anonymous · Answer

i'm the exact same . Bet you get pissed off over the littlest things? i get like that but its mainly over  him talking about other girls..i mean like he knows it pisses me off but why does he keep doing it..this is what i keep saying to myself even tho hes talking about all these girls he's still with me, he loves me not them...but maybe the thing that makes you angry is totally different. Nobody can give you relationship advise unless they know ye as a couple..don't go on a break with him if your still  having those nights where your totally in love with him and nothing is bad because that's all you'll think about when it's over. Relationships are tricky but if its over arguing that your going to break up with him listen to me when i say why can't you simplify life and just enjoy each others company without making it all about the fights. "Its about also knowing in your heart that you may never reach that glorious moment until you die, so live life on the edge..yano half way between heaven and hell and lets all dance in the middle in pergurtory.

Anonymous · Answer

BREAK UP!!! if you've been wondering for a while you obviously  not truley in love youre better off with someone your truely happy with

? · Answer

Maybe take a break

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Do I want in or do I want out? Ugh!?

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