Girls: an HONEST question about what you consider to be love?

Let me be QUITE clear first: I am NOT insulting women or making them out to be spoiled or anything. This is a GENUINE question I have, after having read through a NUMBER of posts on this forum.

It seems that girls tend to base their idea of "being in love" on how well a guy treats them. I have always seen it. For example the question "I love this guy who treats me like dirt, but there's a guy who only wants to treat me like a princess, but I don't have any feelings for him" is met more often than not by the answer "go with the other guy. He knows how to treat a woman". From all of this, it seems like men fall in love with the girl for who she is, but girls fall in love with a man for what he can do for her. Again, I am NOT saying this IS the case or calling women attention-seekers. All I am doing is wanting to be enlightened a little bit as to whether this is true. Because I have always believe that you should not chase love. If it is not freely given, then it is not worth it, but from all of these posts, it seems like women get love from men freely all the time, but a man almost always has to "earn" it by spoiling the girl. Can any of you girl help me understand this a little bit better? Apologies if I have offended anyone, that was not my intention. I will answer yours. Thanks.