Care to comment/critique a truly awful poem?

Oh my, sister

this is just a heart beat of what transpired

and you penned this right, I too am fully

miswired..

you had me with this one, I could not resist answering as I shall not tell you my story

but I felt a total kinship. And a shared sorrow

You've got plenty of wonderful emotion in there, really, Your poem isn't completely hopeless. I suggest revising the wording a little. Try highlighting the best parts of your poem,and then consider the rest for revision. That's the best way to narrow down the task, in my opinion. Also, I might work on the rhythm a little. Even free verse should have a bit of a beat to it--not necessarily too much, but make sure it doesn't sound sloppy.

I love your poem it truly does have a lot of emotional told in it. I suggest u use my heart broke In two rather than short circuited. On the second time that you say short circuited try broken hearted or lost soul.

Hello my friend, it's been a while

So wonderful to read your words once again.

I had to read this several times to find your flow.

It's a quiet, hush tone almost a whisper.

It's a slow read. Each line resonating...

It evokes memories and longing.

I can appreciate that it ends with acceptance...

At some point we must all face the truth.

That's not always easy. Thank you for sharing...

Bit melodramatic, and I don't care, I don't care much, I don't care much at all for the repetitive structure but then I am allergic to anything that seems Whitman-esque.

Not the terrible thing you prepared me for though. False advertising?

It must be very tough to read the poems of a dead loved one. This thought struck me pretty hard.

I think you know the poem is not awful. What happened is awful.

Some of it is not though...awful I mean.