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Was he rude to ask for gift back?
About 5 years ago I met an 90 year old man living in assisted living .
I started taking him out for lunch and errands a couple of times a month when I would go to town ( I live about 25 miles out ) .
Several other people also have provided him transportation and assistance .
About 2 months ago he decided to give 4 different people $500 gift cards to a computer store
( my self included ) then yesterday he called & asked for the gift card back .
He said he wanted to do something else with it .
( Everyone else had already picked up an iPad with their cards ) .
Altho I didn't really need it , I felt it was a gift and rude to ask for it back .
As it was specific to the computer store , it can only be used there .
I did return the card , then he promptly asked me to drive him to several places .
I just do NOT feel like Ever being his taxi again !
Was he out of line or am I being too sensitive ?
BBG - this was some of the cash he has in one of his brokerage accounts that he had forgotten about & the clerks asked what he wanted to do with it .
He lives in an upscale place and has multiple brokerage , savings and pension incomes .
He traveled the globe before entering assisted living and stayed at $200 to $300 a nite hotels 10 years ago .
Giving it to the people helping him for years was Totally his idea .
Tacky would be taking it from someone who can't pay their bills .
3 Answers
- ?Lv 48 years agoFavorite Answer
It was rude of him to ask for the gift back and continue doing his work
Rubbed salt on the wound
- BBGLv 78 years ago
It was rude of him to ask for it back. But honestly, I think it is a bit tacky to accept such a lavish gift from an elderly person.
At 90 he may not be quite clear in his thinking all the time. Perhaps he panicked and realized he really needed the money. Perhaps he had an unexpected medical expense. Perhaps he was having a "senior moment" when he asked for it back.
The job of us younger people is to protect and tolerate the lil' old folks in their 90s. Sometimes they just do stuff the rest of us don't "get." I hope someone has patience for you when YOU'RE 90.
ETA: Sorry, you lost me with your additional comments. You have no business making assumptions about his financial situation. I know plenty of people who drive expensive cars, live in nice homes, and travel when they have NO BUSINESS doing so. Credit is easy to come by. Making stupid decisions is very easy. And lots of people with both stock and real estate investments have been hammered in recent years. But my point is the same. He's 90. NINETY! He is the DEFINITION of a "vulnerable" person and all you can think is about how you can justify keeping $500 that wasn't yours to begin with.
If you volunteer to help him you DO NOT expect something in return. If you will only help for a paycheck, then you need to tell him that (and there wouldn't be anything wrong with that either). But you don't get to pretend to be this magnanimous person and then act like you deserve gifts.
- 8 years ago
Way out of line, that is just rude. Don't be his taxi ever again... He does not deserve it.
Source(s): Me
