Yahoo Answers is shutting down on May 4th, 2021 (Eastern Time) and the Yahoo Answers website is now in read-only mode. There will be no changes to other Yahoo properties or services, or your Yahoo account. You can find more information about the Yahoo Answers shutdown and how to download your data on this help page.

I'm so confused...does he really like me? Why is he being so distant all of a sudden?

I met this guy in April of last year and we've been talking ever since. For the first five-ish months it was pretty casual. Just getting to know each other, establishing a friendship, etc. In October he admitted he really liked me, and although we both agreed we wanted to take things slow, he did say he wanted to talk more and see where things went with the goal of eventually dating. So from then till around the end of December, he would text me daily. Every single day. We both have pretty demanding jobs so we text each other whenever we had time during the day, but our conversations would always start with him saying something like "good morning beautiful" when he got up in the morning and end at night time with him saying "good night/sweet dreams gorgeous" or something along those lines. We live about an hour and a half away from each other, but I would go to most of his hockey games on the weekends and he also came to see me a bit too. Over those months, he's told me that he thinks I'm amazing and that he's never had a chance with anyone as amazing as me, that he wishes he could be with me every day, that just seeing me for a minute makes him so happy, that if he's having a bad day he just needs to talk to me and he feels better, he's said multiple times that he's so worried about screwing things up with me and that if he ever did anything to drive me away he'd never forgive himself, etc. For Christmas, he got me a $100 gift certificate to my favourite clothing store (which to me was a HUGE gesture, as nobody EVER spends that much on me besides my parents). The first time he came to my house to visit me we watched a movie and cuddled and made out some, and after he left he texted me that he had such an amazing time and that he was so sad to be leaving. He took me out on a few "official" dates and each time made me promise it wouldn't be the last time.

I really like this guy. We get along great and have a lot in common. I've never met anyone with such similar morals and interests as me. And he's just the sweetest. A genuinely nice and respectful guy, and that's difficult to find these days.

HOWEVER, this past month has felt different. The first week or so of January were normal but then he suddenly stopped texting me every day. I'm not a clingy person at all so not talking every single day isn't a big deal, but it was just weird because he usually did want to talk to me every day. And then I went to one of his games and he barely talked to me at all the whole night. I texted him the next day and asked if everything was ok. He said yes. I asked him what his intentions with me were (at that point we still weren't officially dating, just kinda "seeing each other") and he said he doesn't know what he wants. I asked what that meant exactly, but all he would say was "I don't know". He finally said (word for word) "you are amazing and I really like and want you, but I just dunno, not sure if I'm ready for all this". I told him that I was cool with him taking some time to think about everything if he needed to, and he hasn't talked to me in about 2.5 weeks now. Didn't even say hi to me when I went to his hockey game this past weekend.

If he's not in a place where he can have a relationship, that's fine. I can't be mad about that. I've been there. Sometimes we all just need to be single and focus on ourselves. I'm just REALLY confused and honestly quite upset that he spent MONTHS making me believe he wanted something with me if he was never actually sure. He basically led me on all this time. That's just not fair and it hurts like hell. I don't know if he was just bored the last few months and was bullshitting me or if he was actually being sincere but just recently decided he wasn't ready. Either way sucks, ya know? I'm trying to be patient and give him the time and space he needs, but I am really worried he's gonna either not ever going to come back or he's going to text me one day saying he for sure doesn't want anything. What should I do? Wait to hear from him? Or just basically say "peace out" right now? I do really want him, but the thing is I don't want to be involved with someone who doesn't really want to be with me. If he has to think about it, he obviously doesn't really want to be with me...right? Am I right to be upset?

Update:

Don't know if this is relevant at all, but I'm 23 and he's 22

1 Answer

Relevance
  • 7 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    I believe he has found someone else sorry. A very smart man told me this once. If you feel it he is doing it, so don't waste your money on me finding out for you. Use that money you were going to pay me, and go buy yourself a new dress or something. Some times the answer to are question we already know we just don't want to accept it because we care for a person. Some us need to hear it from the other person so we put are self through all kind of thing until we find out it is true, he has someone else. You see there are men out there that don't have the b-lls to tell a women to her face that it is over, I would go on about my business and forget him, trust me when I say you will have more boyfriends down the road until you find the right one. The hurt will go away with time.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.