Is this normal in a relationship? How do I fix this?

It's very possible that you guys have passed that honey moon phase and gone into the married couple phase of your relationship. But don't fret as there's a point where this happens to all boyfriend and girlfriends. I think this happens when the relationship becomes a normal routine just like getting up for work or going to school every morning but I do think that this can be fixed. Long-distance relationships are difficult to maintain as it is because of the lack of physical contact. So, I think your relationship is just lacking in that spark that comes with normal relationships. If he's not doing anything, then why don't you make the move? Be spontaneous and exciting. Do things to remind him why he fell in love with you in the first place. Good vibes are often contagious, seeing you in a good and exciting mood can warm him up to your relationship. Talk to him about unique things, not the normal how's the weather. This goes for when you're back in your different cities. It can be difficult to maintain exciting conversations every single day, so there's nothing wrong in not talking every hour of every day. An exciting once a week conversation is much better than a boring every day one.

In the end, it's all up to you guys and your personalities. Just remember to keep things lively and things should be okay. Good luck!

Infatuation fuels the attraction for the first 1-3 years.

We do not actually KNOW the other person, and we can only get to know then by being around them day-in-and-out for a couple of years.

And until we start to know them, no lasting love can start to develop.

In the meantime, in a long-distance relationship, all you have is fantasy.

And hope.

It's not a situation of reality.

Women can live off of fantasy better than men .. men want a warm body to touch.

It sounds like the distance has killed the relationship. It was already coming up on the make-it-or-break-it point, but because you two were far apart, you couldn't make it work.

You two need to either get into the same city .. now ..or break it off.

If you two are committed, does that mean he is ready to marry you? Is he willing TO marry you? Now .. not some distant date?

Mind you, you two do not know each other well enough to make a reasonable decision to marry. But it would certain tell you where HE stood if you pressured him to marry you now. Probably a divorce would result, since infatuation (the first 1-3 years of dating) is NOT a predictor of marital success.

Really, there's nothing to hang onto here, except hope and fantasy.

And somehow I think you deserve better.

And somehow I suspect he has found a warm body that lives where he does. Not talking, not doing Valentine's Day .. this is man who is not afraid to lose you.

Understand that for us women, the thought and hope and communication ... all make us feel loved.

MEN, on the other hand, feel loved, when they touch. You can't touch him long-distance ... without touch there is nothing to hold his interest. He is either asexual or he is getting close to someone else, almost guaranteed.

Talk to him. confrontation is everything in a relationship. Tell him what's troubling you and see what he says about it. if he truly cares for you then he'll be able to understand where you're coming from right. Basically you just got to see what he says or how he reacts to this.

cheers and best of luck to you both!

no its not normal ---- sorry even after decades of marriage you still do romantic things together so after less than 3 years its a very worrying sign ---- i think talk to each other ---- find the spark ---- if you cant then you may as well end it clean and forever