Married to an alcoholic depressive for 41 years- how to deal anymore?

Question

I thought I married the a man of my dreams- well you know how love blinds you. Had a beautiful daughter together.The thing is-after years of trying and be told to shut up-I did. Now that is disturbing him too.I learned so much of my depression was from him.I made a promise to my son that after so many depressions to the point of trying to commit suicide I would never go there again.I realized his problem was not mine but his. Geez at 72 you'd think his Daddy wanting a daughter you'd get over it. To me it looks like slow suicide. He yells at the tv for how pussy people are but I think he is the one who can't accept reality.Everything everyone sucks to him.I have my resentments for so many things- holidays and birthdays ruined - or he can't remember even to this day. he will not  admit to times he tried to choke or hit me or daughter.He absolutely hate life.- I love life .I have went thru 2

? · Accepted Answer

Sounds like you need some professional help. I'd recommend getting in touch with a psychologist for your husband. He doesn't think there is anything wrong with this type of behavior and doesn't realize he is hurting the people who care about him. The only way you'll see change is by a realization from him.

Grab your whole family, tell them this idea and how you feel about it, and try to convince him when you are all together to go through with this. Make sure to tell someone who he respects, if he doesn't respect you he will never listen to you.

I'm sorry you had to go through with this. Good luck, stay safe.

freesongs · Answer

Maybe you need a support group where you can find common ground with others
http://forums.psychcentral.com/depression/
or
www.agingcare.com

Anonymous · Answer

Your husband clearly needs help to deal with his issues. It sounds as if you and your husband could benefit from counselling. The Green Rooms are a respected Glasgow-based organisation who provide couples counselling which could help you and your husband get your marriage back on track. All of their counsellors and therapists are trained and highly experienced, and they offer telephone and skype consultations as well as face-to-face sessions. http://www.thegreenrooms.net/counselling-and-psychotherapy/couples/

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Married to an alcoholic depressive for 41 years- how to deal anymore?

3 Answers