What the Hell is wrong with me? ?

Sheltie Lover, when I read this, I got this image of a rabbit and a fenced-in garden. Your garden is fenced-in, but there is need for repairs. You've got a rabbit who is hopping in over top of the piece of fence that has fallen down.

You are kind, but some people take advantage of this--and it's often people who either don't know how to be kind to themselves or don't care to be kind to themselves. They both know someone else will help them if they keep repeating certain types of stories. The stories could be true or untrue.

When you repair your boundaries, you can decide "I will share what I want to when I really want to. I will sometimes leave some extra out for the rabbit that comes by. I don't want to always be 'at-the-ready' anymore because that is stressful, hurts me, and is not serving me. So I will give when I want to without judging, but I am not the only person available to do this. Sometimes the best thing I can give is a thoughtful word or prayer."

This person also might have few friends and confuse you for someone who has behaved like a friend. So if you're not a friend, then that's another important reason to rebuild your boundaries. If you're not mentoring him or being a neighborly mother/father to him, then he needs to see he cannot just turn up as he pleases. He is welcome to show up, but you will stay in and cook your dinner and MAYBE answer the door and say something like, "I can see that things are very emotional right now. I hope things start going better for you." let him talk "Well, I've got something on the stove so I need to go back to work now. ^_^ " It's not mean, I'm learning....

It's possible he was not self-aware enough to think what he heard was a smoke alarm, but it is odd that he didn't go ahead and ask you. He might have thought he was rude to do that. Either way, he was not thinking things through in a considerate way. If someone hears a strange sound and possibly smells smoke while they're talking with someone, they should say so ^_^ 

Mend your fence........

You're a kind hearted person and people take advantage of that and that's why it's important for people like us to learn when to say no. We might be seen as cold hearted or selfish if we say no but you sometimes have to decide what's more important? someone else's perception of you or your peace of mind?

You're a good person, maybe too good, don't let people take are for granted. You can forgive people without letting them harm you again. A hand up is better than a hand out.

You are a nice person. That usually turns out to be bad for you. Be a jerk. Tell this free loader to piss off, you have your own problem. Believe me, you will be happier in the end.

CONTINUED: All this time, I had supper on the stove and got distracted and forgot about it. When he got up to leave, I came inside and the smoke alarm was blaring full blast. . .. I'm hard of hearing, so I hadn't heard it from outside. In the past, before my hearing went bad, I had heard that alarm all the way out in my front yard.

He HAD to have heard it going off and sat there and didn't tell me. ...The house was so full of smoke that I ended up having to take the clothes out of the closets and wash them. Also had to take down all the curtains and scrub down the walls. .

This is just one example. ... Here are others www.my-jefferson-county-building-journal.com

As I said,what the hell is wrong withe me that people do things like that to me, ... especially after I have tried to help them?