i now realize we need to begin arming ourselves but have never owned a gun. where do i start?

Hurry up, and lots of ammo. Buy them unregistered so they don't know you have them. Ar-10 semi auto (I prefer the .308 AR-15), 8 shot semi auto 12 ga. Shorter barrel is better. A small very concealable 9mm. A more comfortable 9mm with a fingerprint lock next to the bed and next to your car seat. 

9mm ammo is cheap right now, buy it up, it doesn't go bad. 

Take a class because knowing how to use a gun is more important than having one. It doesn't make you safer if your accidently firing or having your firearm taken from you.

First, find out what the law is in your state regarding owning and carrying the sort of gun you're interested in. A lot of gun nuts will tell you to ignore that since the 2d Amendment, in their view, bans any government restrictions on owning guns. That will not keep you out of jail if you get in trouble, as many gun owners do.

Everyone needs to calm down. There’s no need for anyone to arm themselves. Trump has lost, now it’s time for everyone to move on. Peacefully and together.