He doesn't do anything?

Look.. I have literally been in your shoes.. (several years ago).. and I am here to tell you, if you dont stop doing everything yourself.. several years down the road, you will STILL be doing everything yourself.

I had 2 kids, worked 40 hours a week, cooked, cleaned, laundry, baths, homework, ballgames, holidays, cut the lawn, chopped the wood.. yea .. chopped the wood all alone. and barely had time to sleep.  Fast forward to now.. still doing it and you know what.. it is NOBODYS fault by my own.  

I created this monster who is now my x-husband, but I did create it by letting him do nothing. And yes..  most of my free time was being pissed at him.  I was an angry old bat and it still burns my soul to think a person would allow their significant other to work themselves to death.. but they dont care.

So.. my suggestion to you.. is stop doing it all.  Let some of it go and tell him to help or threaten to move out.  What do you have to lose? You are already doing it all.. why have him around.  I know that sounds harsh.. but I am harsh and honest.

Trust me.. its not going to change... unless YOU change it.

If you think you're missing out on "quality" couple time now just wait until a baby takes up all your energy 24/7. This is something couples have to be prepared for before they decide to have a baby. There's just no other way to say it, you and he are going to have a priority other than one another into the foreseeable future. This may be less of a "he doesn't do anything" situation and more of a "I'm not really prepared to be a parent" thing. Having a child just naturally shifts the romance to the back burner, it just does. 

What to do? Stop complaining!

Sounds like everything you’re doing is by your choice and now you’re looking for help with your decisions. You choose to take on all these responsibilities and get upset when someone doesn’t help you? Don’t spread yourself so thin and demand others help. Set boundaries. What kind of work does he do? Is it physical labor? Could explain why he’s tired all the time. Maybe he’s depressed. Sounds like the life you two lead is stressful as hell. Deep down I think this guy is regretting his decisions about his life partner choice. He doesn’t have to like or respect the burdens you choose to put on yourself. 

Passive resistence babe......

instead of doing the dishes........sit down and relax and say you're tired,  and he could do the dishes for once. 

When you see the pets' dish empty.....SAY,  Hey, Hon, can you feed the cat please? 

Instead of cooking.......wait til he gets home and ASK HIM which take out does he prefer......because you're not up to cooking tonight. 

When doing laundry.....so all yours, and leave his in the basket.  When he runs out of clean underwear and socks........explain how the washer works, and then walk away. 

(but don't let him do YOUR laundry, because he'll ruin everything) 

Make a chore list of what you WILL be doing and what you won't. Post it. The things you won't be doing? Don't do them. If that includes picking his clothing up off the floor... don't pick up his clothing anymore. If you need to toss them in a corner until they are a mountain to the ceiling? Then do that. When he gets sick of his mountain of dirty clothing and has nothing to wear? He gets to wash them. Take him with you to a doctor appointment. REQUIRE it. I suspect your husband does not have a good grip on the realities of what the next two years are going to be like and he needs the education so that he realizes that this child bearing and birth and surviving the infancy and first two years of your child's life REQUIRES partnership. 

Do all of this in as good and loving a mood as you can possibly muster. And, in your second trimester, it IS still a great time to continue to have sex. Fit that in too! 

Tell him he needs to contribute more and share in the household jobs.  It's wrong and unfair for you to be doing so much of them, especially since you're pregnant and feeling stressed by it.

You're tired too, so it doesn't matter that he is.  Don't let him use that as an excuse.

First of all, you need to evaluate all of what you’re doing and what of it do you actually need to be doing. Because you complain about a couple of different things here. Do you want quality time with your partner, or do you want him to do more at the house?  Because those aren’t the same thing at all. If you want him to do more around the house, you need to understand this will give you even LESS quality time together, because he will be spending some time doing those things and even more time even more tired and unwilling to do other things with you. Please note that I am NOT saying he shouldn’t do more around the house, I have no idea what the actual distribution of chores in your household is. I’m simply pointing out that you say you want quality time but that you’re pissed off because you do “everything” at home.

Now, about your mom. Not sure why you are caring for her, especially if she has dementia, but that is not going to be sustainable once the baby comes. Look into senior services in your area to see what resources might be available to you. This may mean you have to make the difficult decision to put her into a care facility, but that may be the best choice. And after all, she is your mom, not his, so he has no obligation to help with her or provide for her care.

Your quality time for anything is going to drop hugely once the baby is born. You have a few months to get things resolved before that happens, and you need to, because if you feel this overwhelmed now, it will magnify by 1000 once the baby comes.

Why are you taking care of mom. Put her on medicaid, and let the state pay for here care.

Talk to him. It is only going to get worse after the baby is born. Tell him you are tired too, but we appreciate a little help. Maybe he needs to see a doctor.