Can suicidal thoughts make u cry, or is it just depression or self judgment ?

Suicidal thoughts don't make me cry, they make me laugh. Not happy laughter, but laughter of hopelessness I guess. I have made an exit bag and I want to use it, but I'm also afraid to take the final step. I keep telling myself that I'll do it tomorrow, but always end up postponing it. I hope some day I might have the extra strength to do it and finally have it over with.

Sometimes an ugly cry

is an ugly lie

So you go and do something insane

cuz you listened to that lie again

never knowin whats around the corner

 Did that crazy makes a mourner

never realized just who loved you

is it too late to just see just whooo--

Just who loves yooo

even when you ugly cryyy--

about an ugly lieee.

Without the rain there would be no rainbow 🥰🥰cheer up! Things will get better you'll see.

Wow, I can't believe these people. But it's typical. Sweetheart, there is someone in your life who is making you feel like that. It can be anyone. The most likely culprit is your parents or siblings. But it is possible to be a boyfriend. Or even a so-called friend. You might not even know they are doing it. It's called love bombing. First, they shower you with love or gifts.  Then they insult you. Then shower you again. It's a vicious cycle. Look up narcissistic victim syndrome. ( not a true medical diagnosis. But can be helpful in identifying your symptoms) If the symptoms fit. Then read everything you can about narcissism and try to figure out who it is. Get them out of your life and eventually, you will return to normal. But it takes about two years. Even then you will need to be diligent in your recovery.Good luck sweetie, I wish you a fast recovery.

stop being so sniveling and weak.

Quit thinking about yourself and start thinking about your friends and family and how devastated they'd be If you carry through with it.  What's "ugly cry?"

The thought of suicide ought to make someone cry because of the amount of pain and sadness that suicide needlessly creates for those who have to deal with the aftermath. But whether it makes someone cry isn't really an important question - it's more important to focus on the underlying problems and how to address them.

It seems to me like one of your problems may be too much self-pity and unproductive self-judgement. Instead of focusing so much on what you don't like about yourself, focus more on what your duties are and what God has created you to be. And if there are sins that you actually need to judge yourself for, then confess them, seek God's forgiveness and then put them behind you. But don't beat yourself up over things that aren't even sins but merely your own lack of talent or ability in some particular aspect of life, because those sorts of things are your character, not your fault.