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Did I make the right decision?
My boyfriend and I have had so many arguments throughout the 1 year we have been together. There has never been anything serious, it’s usually him getting overly defensive about something and me getting irritated because he’s started something out of nothing. Since last year I lost my job 3 times due to Covid, I’ve had several set backs to my health and now I think I’m going into depression. I have told my boyfriend, but he hasn’t been there for me, all I want is for him to listen to me vent sometimes or not start unnecessary arguments so I can have a little break from feeling like everything is falling apart. He has not ever wanted to listen and has never tried to hold his tongue. His outlook is ‘suck it up and get over it’ but he expects me to listen and be patient when he’s having a bad day. Yesterday we exploded with each other, we both said things in anger and have both apologised, but after he went into so much detail about how dumb I am, I ended it. I regret it now, because i do really love him and so does my family. However I keep thinking if he can’t show any understanding or consideration then there’s probably no future?
2 Answers
- Anonymous2 weeks ago
From the sounds of things your boyfriend needs to work a little harder in being respectful and understanding things from your perspective. Therefore, what I recommend you do is to cut back on the nice things that you do for him. From this point forward, he needs to earn these things by improving his attitude and proving that he can contribute to the relationship in a meaningful way.
Secondly, I would talk to him and plan fun things for the both of you to do. The logic behind this is to get your boyfriend to contribute the relationship in a meaningful way. I wouldn't worry about him cancelling either because guys are always hesitant to cancel on their partners because they cannot live with the guilt. In saying that, when you do meet up with him place an emphasis on activities that have an interactive theme to them. The purpose of this is to get your boyfriend to be more open with you and listen to you in the way that you desire. This will ultimately contribute to making the relationship positive and emotionally fulfilling. Think about it: the only way that he is going to be more appreciative of what you are going through is if he continues to learn more about you. However, be sure to give him praise when he does make an effort. Ultimately, this will boost his self-esteem and encourage him to show initiative in the future. I really hope this helps :)
