Which of these breads is your favorite?

I’m not sure it matters at this point. We are up against something bigger than all of us.

As you might know, I was working for Exxon. They paid me to post propaganda on Yahoo Global Warming. You can search this section to see a post by “Michael,” who was my Exxon contact.

After my falling out with Exxon, I did some independent investigation. The previous 5 heads of Exxon, Shell, BP, Chevron, and Marathon formed an organization that currently transcends OPEC, and even all oil companies combined.

The Five Bosses are the head of what’s called “The Organization.” Sometimes they are simply referred to as “The 5.” 

They are akin to the five New York crime families, except The Organization is global. They control everything we do: from the coins in your pocket to the number of grass blades you cut with your lawnmower.

The 5 are, of course, all old white men. They are wacist, sexthist, and pure evil. It has been said The 5 fix matches between God and the devil himself.

I am still in hiding and fear for my life. I miss weather girl Tatiana, even though she betrayed me. I am out of food. I even licked all the sticky off my last tub of Neapolitan ice cream.

We live in dire times. God help us all.