How can I feel less bitter about existing (yes, this is serious)?

I have someone in my life who I don't want to hurt, and that's why I won't commit suicide at least at this point in time. That's why I'm still here despite the way I feel, but I nonetheless strongly wish that I had never been born in the first place. 

Many people see life as a gift, but I'm on completely different wavelengths. From my point life is just an unnecessary burden and in my mind I would say that it's a curse to be born. Because there is a lot which reminds me about how I really don't see it as worth it to be born into this world, these thoughts often get triggered and I end up thinking about this a lot. I'm never going to change my mind and think that a life is something worth having, compared to not having to exist, but since I have to stay here for now at least, I'd like to think about this less at least. But I find it hard to ignore these thoughts, they keep coming. So if anyone has any advice on how to keep away your genuine thoughts from your mind, I'd really appreciate to know

I know this might seem stupid and far from a common belief that I'd rather not exist in the first place than to be here, but it is how I feel, and I can't change that. I'm not able to take a look at life, what it entails (good, bad, etc) and think that it something worth having compared to just not existing, so I'm not looking to be convinced that life is something beautiful, or anything like that. I just want to know how to keep my mind off my negative viewpoints