fetusfromspace

I'm genuinely curious and concerned about this. It's getting to the point where I do certainly recognize myself in my current state but then put behind the instances where I'm always satisfying my urge.

I'm 18, a male art major and at home from college. Especially recently, I've been so desperate to find anything and everything to snort, smoke, drink, etc. and I've been in full denial to myself about how it's affecting me. What brought this about was my inability to sleep last night due to recurring dreams about my direction in life if I do perhaps continue this continuous desire for drugs to enhance the mundane existance that I constantly wish to end. Then looking through older tabs on my phone browser, I've found myself searching things such as ways to extract oxyconton from percocet that I'd then later snort.

I'm disgusted with myself and I need some sort of assistance but I'm too embarrassed to seek medical help for this or my worsening depression.

What's wrong with me?

...I'm a guy....

Yesterday, on a Sunday, I decided that I had been having a fairly productive day after getting done with work and going to the YMCA to work out so I declared that a celebratory joint was in order for the end of my evening. I grabbed my dog to go for a "walk" as a cover-up in case my parents got home from work early (I'm 17) and I strolled down to a nearby trail that I recurringly smoke at. From afar I see a glimpse of what appears to be a family treading towards me under the sunset. In my slight alarm, I continue to only discreetly smoke and I turn away, being subdued of my awareness of the advancing family by highness. Every property (even the underlying ones) of the trees, sky, and bushes become intensely vivid and colourfull; their movement in the fair wind, their luminous glow in the mysterious twilight counteracting the presence of day and night, their luscious color that only exists in nature itself and could never be man-made or produced by machines...suddenly, while deep in my own eloquent thoughts, a man who appears to be Mexican rides a small, light blue, child's bike towards me with his family following behind him. He stops his bike next to me, calls our "excuse me" and asks me directions to the nearby Ray's Splash Planet. At the moment my mind was blank except for the million questions pertaining to the unique situation. Why was a middle-aged, mustached Mexican with a notably strong accent riding a small, light blue bike with training wheels? Why was he taking his family to a water park at approximately 8:00pm? Around this time the neighborhood is pretty much dead; seemingly uninhabited. Why aren't these kids wearing shoes? Why is a woman (roughly 6 to 8 months pregnant with 4 kids already) walking through an exhaustingly long trail? Where did they come from? I'm Hispanic and after 6 years of living in this neighborhood I haven't seen other Hispanics within a 3 mile radius of here. I was completely and utterly mystified. Are these people really here? Did I imagine these people? Was the weed I was smoking laced with LSD or something? Am I dreaming? Quickly and subjectively I answer the man's request for directions as seriously as I could while he road the tiny...extremely tiny, light blue bike. As they walked about 20 yards away from me I took a final hit of my shrinking joint in my coat pocket and watch them leave, examining them for signs of genuine realness. They disappeared and I just stood there staring into the abyss of the dark forests, baffled.

Mickey, Minnie, Donald, and Goofy can all talk and they're all animals but why is Pluto incapable of performing human-like functions unlike the rest of the characters?

Im a junior in high school and ive known this dude for a long time now and we've had the best weekends ever together partying, going fishing and blazing. Something came up the other day that made me thoroughly question our friendship... he enjoys the musical "stylings" of Ticklesack... I mean Nickleback. Im not completely sure how I should feel about this, he was the last person I'd expect to like Nipplebag... I mean Nickleback. What should I do?