rorjews

I'm having a problem with Java and need some help.

I wrote out a quick Hello World app in Java:

class TouchingMyself {

public static void main(String[] args) {

System.out.println("Hello World!");

}

}

I then decided to try a little experiment, and quickly typed out a little Hello World app in C:

#include <stdio.h>

void main(void)

{

printf ("Hello World!\n");

}

So, I executed the C program in my testing and timing rig, and it finished in about .02 seconds, which seemed normal.

I then tried to run the Java version, and suddenly this weird red-nosed black and white triangle appeared in my room.

He slapped the taste out of my mouth so hard that I spun around and landed on my stomach. He then produced a large metal phallic object adorned with sharp hooks, and proceeded to jam it directly into my rear nether-region. I begged him to release me, but he insisted that I had to wait for the "garbage collector" to come take care of that. I still don't understand how trash men are involved with him, but this whole thing has just been so confusing.

This ordeal lasted for hours. I woke up in a daze the next day, and ran over to my computer. Just as my eyes focused, the Hello World app finished executing.

So my question is, why is Java so slow?

I think Brittany Murphy dying is funny. Am I a bad person? Really, she wasn't a very good actress and a total drug addict contributing to the black market. Am I really that bad?