INDUSTRYkurt

I lost my job this week for making personal phone calls to her - my son had a seizure a few weeks ago, so I wanted to check on him a few days... anyway ever since then - she has been nothing but cold to me. I even went out and got a new job within HOURS of losing my old one. I went from a white collar job to a blue collar job, but the $$ is better!

She hasn't kissed me in days, and she "doesn't know" what she wants to do with her life.

I hate what she is doing to me right now. We've been through some ups and downs... and when things are up, she is very into me. When things are down, she is hurtful.

What can I do?

MONEY IS AN ISSUE. We are financially struggling BIGTIME right now, so I'd like to do soemthing wonderful for her, but I really can't afford to do much (right now - keeping a roof over our head is the FIRST priority).

Yes I work 2 jobs, yes I have a college degree so personal attacks don't help. Help me with some original ideas.

All are true. I love my wife very much, a few weeks ago we nearly seperaetd because she was seeing someone on the internet but that has stopped and our relationship has become very healthy again. We've made some great strides in the past 3 weeks - and I'm proud of us.

The menage a trois was something she brought up to me over a month ago. Its on my mind a lot and I've decided that its not a good idea.

And yes, I wish she would show me more affection.

All are true. Why is it so difficult to understand?

My wife and I have been together nearly 12 years and she made a big mistake about the internet thing - it was a game that she took too far. She realized her error and corrected it.

So am I naive for trusting her again? I don't think so, 12 years isn't something you waste for something she did in error.

She seems to love me, she tells me she loves me, but I want her to show me more affection. If we kiss, I initiate it. If we embrace, I am the one to pull her in, and she pushes away after a few seconds.

I am always the first to say I LOVE YOU.

Maybe I am too clingy? I have feelings that aren't being addressed, and I think I deserve to be able to feel good about myself.

Menage a trois? My wife wants to bring a 3rd into our sex sometime. She even agreed for it to be a woman, and that it didn't mean a man would have to join us another time.

I am hesitant for a few reasons...

-Disease.

-Fear of our children finding out.

-Fear that my wife would prefer the OTHER person more, and want to be with them.

I love the idea, it sounds very hot, but the thought is really driving me nuts.

BTW - we have 2 children, 4 and 6, and we have been married for nearly 8 years.

I can't seem to cheer up - all I can dwell on is my financial ruin. My wife an I own seperate retail stores, both are starting to increase our sales now that winter is over, but it hasn't been the BOOM we were looking/hoping for. Everyday we are plagued with collectors calling us and debtors threatening this or that. All this is doing is increasing our stress and causeing friction in our marriage. I even took a 2nd day job to increase income, and we are starting to catch up but its not fast enough

How do I focus on the positive side of life, I can't seem to smile anymore.

I am 30, in good shape, no fat anywhere on my body except for around my waist.

I do crunches and sit ups and still can't seem to kick that spare tire. Any advice?

My wife is in love with another man from the internet. Right now our life has been difficult because we are plagued with money probs. Both of us have been playing Second Life (an online interactive game) since oct of 06 to escape reality. In Nov she said she was falling in love with a man on the game and they have been intimate "in game". This nearly tore our marriage apart and sent me into the deepest depression of my life.

By Jan, everything was resolved and life when to back to normal. She has done it again. The new man has been making calls from UK to where we live in US often, she spends more time with him online than I do during the day due to the hours I work. The other day she told me she doesn't know if our marriage will work anymore because of her other relationship.

Is there hope for us? She is the mother of my 2 children and the love of my life, but she's been hurting me terribly for six months now. I want counseling but can't afford it. Help me. be kind.