WhyNotMe

That will come out to your office

I said that I was going to post on my twitter page how good our luv makings was, and I didn't. I'm I really in the "DOGG" house for this?

How do you deal with someone who puts that kind of responsibility on you and feels that things aren't working because you are not constantly making them feel good.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/20090424/sc_li...

would like your perspective on the joint versus separate accounts: Do you believe that a married couple should have a joint account, or each have a separate account and a joint account? Why?

A devoted wife had spent her lifetime taking care of her husband. Now he had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to his senses, he motioned for her to come near him.

As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what?"

"What, my dear?" she asked gently.

"You're a goddamn jinx!"

A very loud, unattractive, acidic-acting woman walks into the Warehouse with her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

The Warehouse Security dude says, "Good morning and welcome to the Warehouse

.... nice children you've got there - are they twins?"

The ugly woman stops screaming long enough to say, "Hell no they ain't, the oldest one, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins?........ Do you really think they look alike?"

"Ahhh, No", replies the greeter, "I just couldn't believe you got laid twice!"

Joke of the morning,

1. It's important to have a woman who helps at home, who cooks from time to time, cleans and has a job.

2. It's important to have a woman who can make you laugh.

3. It's important to have a woman who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you.

4. It's important to have a woman who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.

5. It's very, very important that these four women do not know each other.

Not all me think this way. "Hanging around friends who stray makes cheating seem normal and legitimizes it as a possibility. The message he's subconsciously telling himself: "My friend is a good guy who happens to be cheating on his wife. I guess even the best of us do it."

Do we?

Isn't it time to due away with it? The person with the most votes win. I feel it's making this harder then it has to be.

Christie Brinkley's ex Peter Cook isn't just a perv, he's a world-class moron, too.

He's given a shocking sitdown to Barbara Walters in which he says he cheated on Christie Brinkley because he didn't get "the attention" and "the thank-you" he needed for his "efforts" and all the "tremendous work" he was doing for the family.

Butt Measurements

A man and his wife were working in their garden one day and the man looks

over at his wife and says: 'Your butt is getting really big, I mean really

big. I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue.

With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill and

then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife's

bottom.

Yes, I was right; your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!!!'

The woman chose to ignore her husband.

Later that night in bed, the husband is feeling a little frisky.

He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off.

What's wrong?' he asks. ....

She answers: 'Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-*** grill

for one little weenie?

Friday day joke of the day...

A blonde and brunette were watching the 6 o'clock news. The news was about a man about ready to jump off a bridge.

The brunette turns to the blonde and says, " I bet you $50 the man is going to jump." The blonde replies, "Okay you're on." Sure enough, the man jumps, and the blonde gives the brunette $50.

The brunette says, "I can't accept this money. I watched the 5 o'clock news and saw the man jump then." "No, you have to take it," says the blonde.

"I watched the 5 o'clock news too... but I didn't think he would do it again."

Saw this in Maxim magazine. Is there any truth to this?

1. Because she hasn’t sown her wild oats.

Congratulations for catching her back when she was in her virginal bliss. But now she’s wondering what she missed, so she wants to test her motor oil—with someone else’s dipstick.

2. Because you don’t listen.

While you yawn and glaze over as she yaps on about her day, that guy she met at the gym is laughing at her puns, paying rapt attention to her work skirmishes and mother issues, and remembering her birthday.

3. Because her best friend is a cheating tramp.

It’s hard to stay on the sidelines when your best pal is playing the field. And chances are, the bit her buddy is getting on the side has a handsome friend who’d love to meet your honey.

4. Because you treat her like your little sister.

Mussing her hair as if she’s 10 years old and calling her Shorty doesn’t help her feel like the live-action Jessica Rabbit she yearns to be. Yeah, it’s great the two of you get along like Jerry and Elaine on Seinfeld. But if you don’t stroke her hair, hold her hand, and make her feel some passion, she’s going to look elsewhere for validation of her sensuality.

5. Because you treat her like a sex toy.

On the other hand, if all she thinks you want her for is her body, she’s going to look elsewhere for confirmation that her thoughts on the crisis in East Timor really matter, even if she’s espousing them with her ankles around her ears.

6. Because your favorite couple just split up.

The great pair you always double with to ball games and the movies just moved to Splitsville. Now your squeeze is enviously watching her fellow female flex her sexual freedom—and is getting ideas that involve more than routine shagging with you.

7. Because she’s upset about turning 25 (or 30 or 35).

And she wants to recapture her wild-child past by coming on to guys like it’s homecoming weekend at the frat house once again. (It may seem cool when she comes home with a keg tapper, but be afraid—be very afraid.) Birthdays can be stressful events, and she may feel it’s time to reevaluate her relationships.

8. Because that new guy at work is so attentive.

You can’t know the daily traumas she faces at work, and you can’t bat around the corporate jargon she speaks from nine to whenever. But that guy at the office, the one she has a flirty friendship with, understands exactly where she’s coming from. No wonder she’s been working late.

9. Because she’s depressed.

You’ve tried everything to lift her spirits—to no avail. Kudos to you, but she may just try to pick herself up by getting herself picked up. Which won’t be hard. Women with low self-esteem are magnets for men: We come across as vulnerable. Read: easy.

10. Because she wants you to make a commitment.

She wants to leap over a relationship hurdle (shacking up, getting an engagement rock), and you’ve been dragging your feet for so long that all she can smell is burned Nike rubber. So she’s straddling her tennis coach so you’ll stop straddling the fence.

11. Because she’s got unfinished business with her ex.

And he’s recently started cropping up in a “we’re just friends…we’re just having lunch” type of way. Translation: “We’re way more than friends…we’re having each other for lunch.” If she never really put closure on her last relationship, there’s always a chance she’ll sneak back to resolve things once (or twice) and for all.

12. Because you’re just too damned cocky.

You think you’re the greatest thing since seedless watermelon, and as far as you’re concerned, she’s lucky to have you! Well, while you’re busy convincing her that the Dunkin’ Donuts cashier has a crush on you, she’s found a sure way to bring your ego down a notch.

13. Because she wants to live in the land of grownups.

You’re charming and funny in a frat-boy way, still wearing flannel shirts and eating Crunchberries out of the box. Great, but she’s ready to evolve and wants to find some guy named Blaine or Jean-Luc who understands her need for a $65 dish drainer from the MoMA bookstore.

14. Because you’ve stopped trying in bed.

But in her slightly repressed little heart, she fears asking you for something new, because it implies she hasn’t been enjoying your basic boinking thus far. Her rationale: Better to go wild with a random sex-machine boy and help you keep your self-respect.

15. Because you had a huge row.

After a blowout battle, she concludes, much like Ross on Friends, that you two are on a “break” and it’s legal for her to drink a lake of liquor and give blow jobs to a local intramural basketball team, who, she’s pleased to discover, appreciate her much more than you do.

16. Because she’s bored and wants to try a new flavor.

Look, women like variety, too. No, you can’t be a soap star/lumberjack/New Age author all in one, but you can say yes when, out of the blue, she asks you to accompany her rock climbing or day trading, or to a yoga class.

17. Because she wants to have it out with you.

You’ve had exasperating arguments about the same topic—money, kids, the hairball you won’t clean out of the drain—for so long that now she wants to passive-aggressively pick a real fight. And what better way to piss you off than to play weigh-my-package with the UPS guy?

18. Because she wants out.

Deep down inside she wants to call it quits, but she doesn’t have the babe-balls to give you the ax. Cheating on you is a way of breaking up without her having to do the heavy lifting. She just wants to hear the slamming door while she’s doing it doggy style with the delivery boy.

19. Because you flirt with everything that walks.

You’ve ogled so many other babes’ hot pants and tube tops that she feels as if her body is second-team, so she’s going to seek out a self-esteem-bolstering sex buddy who swears she’s his first-string fantasy girl.

20. Because you pay her too much attention.

No, you can’t win. You bring her flowers, you write her notes, you listen intently to even the most agonizing retelling of last night’s Lifetime movie. Then you come home one day to find the gardener showing her how he likes to use a hoe. What happened?

Do you as a married person have a friend(s) that you consider to be a bad influence on you? As to were you are doing/have done things that you other wise wouldn't ever do while married or in a relationship.

I bought a 97 Jeep Grand Cherokee in Feb. The price as $3995 & put down $3000 cash. They in housed the rest of the amount to be financed for a total of $1625. A little after a month of having the car the brakes totally started going out and I take it to a mechanic and he says all four brakes are copletely worn to the rotors and everything needed to be replaced. All this would cost $800 he also said this damamge had been done prior to us buying the car. Well I didn't have that $ right then so one day I go to take my kids to school and the battery wouldnt start. AAA comes out and says the 575 AMP battery I have in my car is the wrong one I need at least a 700AMP, so I had to buy another battery. I faxed/emailed the dealership a letter stating all the things wrong with the car so shortly and could we work something out on the payments. NO they took it from the store parking lot while me and my kids were in the store. What rights do I have?

I bought a 97 Jeep Grand Cherokee in Feb. The price as $3995 & put down $3000 cash. They in housed the rest of the amount to be financed for a total of $1625. A little after a month of having the car the brakes totally started going out and I take it to a mechanic and he says all four brakes are copletely worn to the rotors and everything needed to be replaced. All this would cost $800 he also said this damamge had been done prior to us buying the car. Well I didn't have that $ right then so one day I go to take my kids to school and the battery wouldnt start. AAA comes out and says the 575 AMP battery I have in my car is the wrong one I need at least a 700AMP, so I had to buy another battery. I faxed/emailed the dealership a letter stating all the things wrong with the car so shortly and could we work something out on the payments. NO they took it from the store parking lot while me and my kids were in the store. What rights do I have?