Rock

Where can i get a pair from

I need the 4 digit blootooth pass key, anyone help, many thanks

Can i use a cable from my sony ericsson k850i to my car stereo aux to use it as hands free? i could with my old phone nokia n95

Brian came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep.

He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep.

When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white robe.

“Who the hell are you?” Demanded Brian, “and what are you doing in my bedroom?”

The mysterious Man answered “This isn’t your bedroom, and I’m St Peter”.

Brian was stunned “You mean I’m dead!!! That can’t be, I have so much to live for, I haven’t said goodbye to my family….you’ve got to send me back Straight away”. St Peter replied “Yes, you can be reincarnated but there is a catch.

We can only send you back as a dog or a hen.” Brian was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen. A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground. “This ain’t so bad” he thought until he felt this strange feeling welling up inside him. The farmyard rooster strolled over and said “So you’re the new hen, how are you enjoying your first day here?” “It’s not so bad” replies Brian, “but I have this strange feeling inside like I’m about to explode”. You’re ovulating” explained the rooster, “don’t tell me you’ve never laid an egg before”.

“Never” replies Brian “Well just relax and let it happen”

And so he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops out from under his tail. An immense! feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that ever happened to him…ever!!!

The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife shouting…

“Brian, wake up you drunken bastard, you’ve **** in the bed

A big guy walks into a bar, notices a very large jar on the counter,

> and sees it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. He guesses there must

> be thousands of dollars in it.

>

> He approaches the bartender and asks. "What's up with the jar?"

>

> "Well, you pay $10 and if you pass three tests, you get all the

money."

>

> The man certainly isn't going to pass this up. "What are the three

> tests?"

>

> Pay first, those are the rules." says the bartender. So the man gives

> him the $10 and the bartender drops it into the jar. "OK," the

> bartender says. Here's what you need to do:

>

> First - You have to drink that entire gallon of pepper tequila, the

> whole thing, all at once...and you can't make a face while doing it.

>

> Second, There's a pit bull chained-up out back with a sore tooth.

> You have to remove the tooth with your bare hands.

>

> Third. - There's a 90-year old woman upstairs who has never reached

> org a sm during inter-course. You've gotta make things right for her."

>

> The man is stunned. "I know I paid my $10, but I'm not an idiot!

> I won't do it! You have to be nuts to drink a gallon of pepper

> tequila, and then do those other things..."

>

> "Your call," says the bartender, "but your money stays where it is."

>

> As time goes on and the man has a few drinks, then a few more, he

> asks, Where ez zat tequila?" He grabs the gallon with both hands and

> downs it with a big slurp. Tears streaming down both cheeks, but he

> doesn't make a face.

>

> Next, he staggers out back where the pit bull is chained-up and soon

> the people inside the bar hear a huge, noisy scuffle going on outside.

> They hear the pit bull barking, the guy screaming, the pit bull

> yelping and then. ..............silence.

>

> Just when they think the man surely must be dead, he staggers back

> into the bar, with his shirt ripped and large bloody scratches all

> over his body.

>

> "Now," he says. "where's the old woman with the sore tooth?"

An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are all to give speaches to the Deaf Society. All are keen to make an impression on their audience.

The Englishman goes first and to the surprise of his colleagues starts by rubbing first his chest and then his groin. When he finishes the Scotsman and Irishman ask him what he was doing.

Well" he explained" By rubbing my chest I indicated breasts and thus Ladies and by rubbing my groin I indicated balls and thus Gentlemen. So my speech started Ladies and Gentlemen".

On his way up to the podium the Scotsman thought to himself I'll go one better than that English bastard and started his speech by making an antler symbol with his fingers above his head before also rubbing his chest and his groin.

When he finished his colleagues asked what he was doing. "Well" he explained" By imitating antlers and then rubbing my chest and groin I was starting my speech by saying Dear Ladies and Gentlemen".

On his way up to the podium the Irishman thought to himself I'll go one further than those mainland bastards and started his speech by making an antler symbol above his head, rubbing his chest, and then his groin, and then masturbating furiously.

When he finished his colleagues asked him what he was doing. "Well" he explained," by imitating antlers, rubbing my chest and then my groin and then masturbating I was starting my speech by saying -

Deer Ladies and Gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure......."

A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After the

checkup, the doctor took the wife aside and said, "Your husband is

suffering from severe, long-term stress and it's affecting his

cardiovascular system. He's a good candidate for either a heart attack

or a stroke. If you don't do the following four things, your husband

will surely die".

"First, each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast and send him off to

work in a good mood."

"Second, at lunch time, make him a warm, nutritious meal and put him

in a good frame of mind before he goes back to work."

"Third, for dinner, fix an especially nice meal, and don't burden him

with household chores."

"Fourth, and most important for invigorating him and relieving stress,

have sex with him several times a week and satisfy his every whim in

bed."

On the way home in the car, the husband turned to his wife and asked,

"So, I saw the doctor talking to you and he sure seemed serious. What

did he tell you?"

"You're going to die," she replied.

An elderly Italian man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite Italian anisette sprinkle cookies wafting up the stairs. Gathering his remaining strength, he lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled downstairs.

With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen. Where if not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favorite anisette sprinkled cookies.

Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted Italian wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?

Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the wondrous taste of the cookie was already in his mouth, seemingly bringing him back to life.

The aged and withered hand trembled on its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife....."Back off!" she said, they're for the funeral."

I can form a fist but i cant open my hand afterwards