lost_sole_28

i have these symptoms went to er last nite they say i may have intestional virus. they pulled blood my potasium count was 3.2 blood sugar was 126 i am 36 years old male. also they wanted to start an iv last nite but couldnt fins a vein after they drew blood so i was discharged.they gave me lamodel for diahrea and some potasium pills thats it ekg was ok. but every time i had a bowel movement i would get weak to the point of almost passing out. any ideas as what this could be?

it's called trimenagin!

this housewife ask's her husband for ten thousand dollars for breast implants.her husband replied "are you out of your mind?" no way am i paying ten thousand dollars for breast implants.he said try rubbing toilet paper on them. the wife now angry ask's what good would rubbing toilet paper on them do?. the husband said "what good?" just look at your butt!!!

why are they so expensive to buy and very hard to sell?

third grade!

a full set of teeth!

anyone who can run, jump or swim is already over here!

what do you call a bunch of rednecks running around in circles?....... NASCAR!

these two men drinking a beer on one's porch . one was talking about going on a fishing trip , the other man asks the other say bud if i were to slip over to your house while you were gone fishing and had an affair with your wife and she got pregnant and had a child would we be related?. the other one says i dont know if we would be related but we sure would be even!

hear about the new cereal for homosexuals? it's called queery o's . you pore milk over them and they eat their selves!

what do you call a prostitute with a runny nose? .... full !

because the world isnt ready for pimp my house trailer!

he cought fire and burnt to the ground!

they mark the cows that kick with a red X

this lady goes to her gynocoligist for her annual check-up after the doctor gives her the exam he makes a remark about filling up her stuff with ice cream and eating it , the woman get's outraged and goes home and tells her husband what the doctor had did the man gets outraged also then he sits back down in his chair and the woman says arent you gonna go down there and whip his butt the man says no anyman that can eat that much ice cream i dont wanna mess with him!!!

this old trucker is heading home been gone for three weeks finaly he gets home walks in the house sets down at the table he ask's his wife to fix him something to eat and she say's ok but first i want to show you what i bought while you were away , he says can it wait i am hungry i been driving for two days to get home i havent stopped could you please fix me something to eat?, she said not till i show you what i got . the man says ok if it will make you hurry up. she goes off to the bedroom and comes back with a pair of pink frilly bikini underware and he says oh hunny those are nice . she says you will never guess what i paid for them he ask's and she says 39.95 he says you gave 39.95 for a pair of panties she said you wouldnt put expensive perfume in a cheap bottle would you and he said no and i would spend my time giftwrapping a dead beaver either....

owner operator !!!

this man rides his snowmobile through alaska it starts acting up so he heads into the next town he pulls up to a service garrage the attendant walks out and says "let me guess you blew a seal" the man say's nope "that's just frost on my mustache"

scares the crap out of the dogs!!!

this man was laying in bed early one morning while his wife was making breakfast. he started feeling frisky so he whistled for the dog. he wrote a note and stuck it under the dogs collar and sent the dog to the kitchen the wife see's the note and reads it it say's "the pole is up the tent is spread to heck with breakfast come back to bed" the wife turns over note and writes a message on it sends it back with dog the man who is eagerly waiting reads note "take down the pole put the tent away the monkey had a hemorage no circus today"