Silver Fox

A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license.

First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test. The optician

showed him a card with the letters:

'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'

"Can you read this?" the optician asked.

"Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."

A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into

the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs,

"Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!"

The husband said, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or

mountain stuff?" "Doesn't matter," she said. "Just get out."

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.

Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.

"Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD!

You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!

We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE

BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful . CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL!

You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry

up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt

them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE

SALT! THE SALT!"

The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you? You

think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels

like when I'm driving."

One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a

very sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything

you want."

So he tied her up and went golfing.

I’m getting an error on start up it reads;

Runner Error

Invalid BackWeb Application Id “137903”

What does it mean? and how can I fix it?

A husband and wife came for counseling after 15 years of marriage.

When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a long, painful

tirade,listing every problem they had ever had. She went on and on and

on about neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling

unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had

endured over the course of their marriage.

Finally, the therapist got up, walked around the desk, asked the wife

to stand, and then embraced and kissed her passionately.

The woman quietly sat down as though in a daze.

The therapist turned to the husband and said, "This is what your wife

needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?"

The husband thought for a moment and replied,.. "Well, I can drop her

off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I golf.