lkps

Okay, so I have a foster teen, who is 17, who is a super great girl. I met her through the youth group I teach at my church, and she and a boy, who is now in college here in town, met through the church also. They clicked, like, IN LOVE totally clicked - neither of them are much for dating and they were SO into eachother. Then he went back to Hawaii for the summer and things started to decline for her.

She has had a very hard upbringing - abuse and suicide in her family has taken its toll on her but she is a strong, wonderful, mature and faithful girl. Because of this, she decided she wanted to TRY moving back in with her birth family last summer, obviously it went terribly and over the summer she ran away to another city - until found and brought back to this city. She had to hang out in kiddo jail for about 3 months while they revoked her father's custody and now shes on her feet and back to my home.

My question is, she and the boy havent really talked or seen eachother for months, she still has feelings for him and he has his heart broken by her running away and losing contact etc. BUT he is our family friend and he comes over for dinner etc often...

I wonder - in your opinions - should I avoid them being together OR should I encourage it? I love them both and they were genuinely happy before all this mess. I wonder if there is still a chance there OR if it will just be awkward and uncomfortable to them both if theyre both around for family get togethers... Odd question, I know. But like I said, love em both and dont want to discomfort them ;)

Thanks for your insight guys!

Okay, so I have a foster teen, who is 17, who is a super great girl. I met her through the youth group I teach at my church, and she and a boy, who is now in college here in town, met through the church also. They clicked, like, IN LOVE totally clicked - neither of them are much for dating and they were SO into eachother. Then he went back to Hawaii for the summer and things started to decline for her.

She has had a very hard upbringing - abuse and suicide in her family has taken its toll on her but she is a strong, wonderful, mature and faithful girl. Because of this, she decided she wanted to TRY moving back in with her birth family last summer, obviously it went terribly and over the summer she ran away to another city - until found and brought back to this city. She had to hang out in kiddo jail for about 3 months while they revoked her father's custody and now shes on her feet and back to my home.

My question is, she and the boy havent really talked or seen eachother for months, she still has feelings for him and he has his heart broken by her running away and losing contact etc. BUT he is our family friend and he comes over for dinner etc often...

I wonder - in your opinions - should I avoid them being together OR should I encourage it? I love them both and they were genuinely happy before all this mess. I wonder if there is still a chance there OR if it will just be awkward and uncomfortable to them both if theyre both around for family get togethers... Odd question, I know. But like I said, love em both and dont want to discomfort them ;)

Thanks for your insight guys!

Okay, I have 2 kids, I am in my 30s and I am 140 lbs, 5 foot, wear a size 4/small. I know I have some weight I could lose, but I really dont think I should qualify as "overweight" on the BMI!? I have always been very athletic built, extremely muscular even when I was in college I wore a 0 and still weighed 120.

The BMI says to be an average weight I would have to weigh like 98-108... I havent weighed that since 6th grade...

So my question is, does anyone else have this problem with BMI or am I just too comfortable, but should probably lose weight? Ugh. ITs weird.

My husband of 6 years has worked long hours in an oilfield job for about the past 5 years. It was tough work, lots of hours, excruciating weather conditions etc. I got a great job about 1.5 years ago, and our kiddos were in school so no more childcare costs, which allowed him some financial relief. We began talking about him changing careers to something more suited to him being home more often, but with less money.

In January of this year, my husband got laid off from work. He did not get another job until June, did not even look for one. He says he was so relieved to get out of that field that he wanted to just enjoy his life again. He would go snowboarding, biking etc all day instead of look for work, then he finally got a job waiting tables (which is where we met in college) and he would stay out late drinking after work etc. I finally had enough, so I rented my moms house and told him to figure out what he wanted and to move in if he decided to be a working part of our family.

He eventually did, he went back to work in the oilfield for 2 months and moved into my moms with me and kiddos, but then quit work to go back to school in August. Since then, he has quit school this month, taking F's since he dropped out past the deadline, and is painting someones house for work, but only does that sporadically. It is not a set job, just a handyman type of thing.

He went home (back to Maine, were in Colo.) recently and now he wants to move home. He misses his family and wants to be back there but I am happy here, have a good job, want to stay.

On top of that, he seems resentful toward me in my opinion, perhaps about working so hard for the first years of our marriage?

Also, he created a checking account that is only in his name, and his money from painting is what goes in there. It makes me think he is planning a "just in case" if he decides he wants out of this marriage. He says it isnt that at all, that he just wants to keep track of his own income, but I dont feel right about it.

What is your take on this? What would YOU do in this situation?

I want to watch the new episode of Desp. housewives but it is on tv right now. Wanna watch it online - will it b online tonight or not until tomorrow? Thx! "o)

I had a jones fracture (fifth metatarsal break, 2 pins added) and I am 3 wks away from getting the walking cast (non weight bearing) removed. My question is, what kind of shoe will I wear after the walking cast is removed?

I have just recently left my husband to give him space to deal with his alcoholism. He is on the right path, and we have a good goal, for him to stay at our old house, sober and in treatment for 6 months, when he can move in with me and our kids if he is still sober and in treatment of course. My question is, should we be "dating" and having sex and hanging out even thought we are in separate homes and are leading separate lives at this point?

I ask because we are on the same page, we have the same goal and he is willingly admitting and working on his problem - so I want to keep the connection between us alive and healthy while he is in treatment... is that right or wrong?

My husband of 6 years has a drinking problem and I cannot seem to get a handle on which direction I should go. We have 2 kids, 5 and 3, he is a good dad when he isnt drunk and he is very much in love with me. He says he is willing to change - and he is drinking less than he was before, but it is 6 years later and he is STILL drinking enough for it to be a problem.

How much?

3 years ago - it was like a 1.75 bottle of Captian Morgan a week or weekend. From about 10 am to 10 pm until it was gone he would get drunk and be worth nothing the next day. He would get so drunk he would fall asleep on the bathroom floor, wake up, puke on the floor and fall back asleep. He would pee the bed.

Now - He drank a small bottle of Jager this last weekend, by himself Fri. then was too hung over to do anything all day, so I went about my own business. Then Sun we had dinner at my dads, he drank 2 beers there, stopped at the liq store and drank a 6 pack at home and drank a few more six packs throughout the week. Every night or at least every other night he drinks 3 or 4 beers and binge drinks on the weekend, then grouches that I dont include him in our family activities and that he never gets things done he wants to do! Hmmm.... maybe bc u are drunk or hungover... just a thought...

My question is, when is enough enough, do they change slowly or just find a level you can deal with!? What should I do as I feel I am not getting the kind of support from a husband I need, and not the support my two kids need as a father either??

Should I require he gets couseling, move out for a while? Let him keep working on it alone since he has made progress?? What should I do??

I have total points of 270.5 out of 335 currently at a grade of 80.75% (B). The final is worth 100 points and I want to know what grade I can get on the final to retain my B? Thanks SO much ;o)

I had an interview Sun afternoon with an Episcopal church for a youth minister position, my exp is this - in christian college for education degree, im 27, married and 2 young kids, in church all my life (youth group, sun school and sun service but not ALL the time) currently work at a gym childcare ctr. and I made it aware that I love counseling people, etc.

At the interview they said I was among the top applicants and when i left she said I have a good feeling, I have another interview coming in now and I ll let you know in the next few days.

I left, bought a thank you note, filled it out from my heart and dropped it in the church's mailbox, and havent heard anything one way or the other yet!!

I think it went well, but how long does it usually take to find out!! How would you say my outlook is!? Advice on the entire process... Anything - my nerves are out of whack today on this 3rd day after interview...

I have the opportunity to move to a ski town where I can get a job asap. Rent is down there, and I can act afford a comprable place for less money.

My hus lived there and moved to colo to be there, we have 2 kids, (young, 3 and 5) and I am just wondering how many of U would make that move!?

We own our home now, dont really love the town and its very expensive to live here.

Would you consider or do you think the grass just seems greener...?

I have heard that a lot of psychology students have problems or illnesses they are trying to figure out - that is why they study psychology. I want to find some facts supporting this if there are any.

Reason being - my brother is wanting to marry a girl who is a psych. grad, has had both eating disorders since she was like 9, has a dad who is clinically mild schitzo, but severely manic depressive AND bipolar. He sets up tape recorders in air vents around their house to spy on his wife, just to name one thing.

Needless to say, I am not quite sure she is the best choice woman to marry and raise a family with and i am trying to persuade him away from this but it is hard as she is really pretty and "fun". She has manipulated him to thinking she is the BEST thing ever and he is so stupid for letting her go...

My bro is successful and very capable - no issues other than a bit of insecure self image - thats where having a "beautiful" gf comes into play...

I just dont know the right things to tell him to voice my opinion - if there were facts on this it might help my fight!

Thanks for your facts and ideas!

I have a home that I am getting ready to sell adn I have a home I want to buy that is a fixer with a lot of potential to make profit. I want to get into a contract with the new home before someone else does; but I will be pushed to get my home on the market sooner than i would like by doing so.

The facts are this - home is listed for 300K with cosmetic damage. It shows horribly. Comps in the neigborhood are for sale for 479 and 429. The seller agent told me that they would take a contract of 260, so i want to offer them a contingency with my home to sell before I buy. I want to add in that they only take back up offers becasue I wil have to do a 203K loan (which is a lot of paperwork I dont want to do if they will take a better offer and drop me).

Do you think this would be fair if I offer them 270 with all those discrepancies or should i just start at 260 and see what they say...

Thanks!

I am getting ready to put my home on the market and I have one in mind that I want to put an offer on. I talked with the seller of the home I want and she has been great in giving me information on the home that normally would not be disclosed - the home is a fixer and she has let me know the range the family is willing to go down to, the personal reasons why theyre getting out of it, etc. For this reason I feel I have loyalties to her to buy this home, but I have someone else in mind if I am going to be selling my home. I want to use someone more aggressive - this seller is on vacation a lot, babysits her grandkids often, etc. I want to get my house sold asap, so i want the aggressive one to sell for me.

The catch - The seller of the home i want to purchase is willing to sell my home for 5%, the realtor I want to sell my home is willing to sell for 5.5%

What is your opinion on how I should handle this and not P*ss anyone off! ;o) Thanks

Are you allowed to stay in the home you currently own under an FHA loan and buy a new home under FHA 203K? We want to buy a home that needs a lot of work but need a place to live while it is being fixed up. Can we stay in our home and not sell it until our new home is fixed up? I know you cant have 2 FHA loans at the same time except under special circumstances but I was wondering if this qualifies as one of them...

Will homes go up in value if the FHA limits go back up to what they were in Dec of 2008?

Anything else about what happens when FHA limits go up is awesome too ;o)

My husband has a joint account with an ex that is 10 yrs old and has not been used by either of them in 10 years.

We cant find her to get her off the card but my husband wants to use it - what would you do in this situation?

Use it and let her figure out how to get her name off of it?

We have been told that both parties have to sign off to close this account...

Okay, my husband has a cc with a large credit line but no balance. It is a joint account with an ex of his and he would like to keep the card and use it, but doesnt have any way to get ahold of ex to get her off of it.

I think he wants to stay honest as far as not running up her credit while she has no idea of it. Can he request she be taken off, and have AMEX contact her to do so, or should he try to locate her? That would be out of the question as she is one of those people you never want to run into again.

The reason he wants to keep the card is bc it has a great apr, has had a 0 balance for like 10 years and it is a good company. He wants to transfer his existing debt with another cc to this one...

If he does not get her off of the card it will continue to stay on his credit with no balance and a super high limit; which isnt good for his credit I have been told.

Dont want to be dishonest and "fake" her signature as that is illegal, can he use this card and get the statements sent to him and just not even worry about her or is that really wrong too??

It has a large credit line on it and has been open since 1999 without any balance. He cant cancel it without her, and he has no idea how to find her. Since having 4 credit cards open is really hurting his credit score, should we cancel his others and use this one since it cant be closed? Would this be okay or is there a way that this could become illegal or something?

The balance transfers would only be like 1200. Nothing major, it would just eliminate the fact that he has 4 different cards...

Any advice on this would be so appreciated! Thanks ;o)

I will be finishing my masters in teaching and I want to know if it should be relatively hard or easy to find a ft job as a college professor at my young age. I grad. from a private univ. with a 3.8

I willl be in Texas, btw!