kid

So to sum it up, I have socially isolated myself since I was 13(I'm 18 now), I have not had any friends whatsoever since then, and I have dealt with depression and a lot of social anxiety as well as suicidal tendencies increasingly ever since. I don't even know how many times I have come too close to almost killing myself. I just started college and after some intense contemplation I finally managed to talk to a counselor about it on campus. But when I went in I saw that if I admitted to any form of self harm that it said they were "obligated" to tell my family or refer me to a hospital, and I really don't want that, that gives me too much anxiety to handle and I feel like its punishing me for trying to help myself. Recently I have just been dealing with things heavily and really have been cutting a lot, as well as coming close to killing myself a lot more frequently than normal for me. I want to get help for it but I just don't know how to go about it without them telling my family or sending me to some psych ward or hospital. 

Ok so I pretty do not think any girls like me, at all. I don’t know why it’s just how it feels. I’m not popular at all and I honestly see why none if them would like me. But there is this girl in my sociology class who sat across from me at the table. I honestly don’t think she likes me but she acts weird af. Like I’ll be looking at the computer screen and without looking I’ll notice here looking at me and I just keep looking at the screen. Then sometimes she will stretch and like bend all the way back showing her body like revealing af. As well as she’ll fix her hair or sometimes slap one of them lil mirror case things girls have put and like adjust ****. I also notice she does not seem to look at the other guys at the table much. I have no idea about anything in this sort so does this mean she maybe likes me or?... am I just delusional and just imagining things. I’m probably delusional.

About a week ago I signed up for and downloaded Windows Insider because a friend showed me and encouraged me to do so. After I had installed it and gotten the beta updates my computer started running slowly and I was only getting around a fourth of the FPS I used to get on games. I opened task manager to check it out and my CPU, GPU, and RAM were all high percentages, high percentages like I was running a game or rendering something, but I was not doing anything and the only thing I had open was Google. I quickly picked up on that it was the Windows Insider, so I tried to uninstall it. I went in and went back to the previous version of Windows 10. But the Windows Insider re-installed and I could not uninstall this time. I tried everything and I could not get rid of it. My computer was useless and could not even run smoothly doing simple tasks. Out of options I decided to reset my computer, factory reset. Afterward the problem still persists. I don t know how to fix this please help. I called Acer support center and they said my warranty expired so they cannot help me. My specs are: Acer Aspire V3-372T Signature Edition, Intel(R) Core(TM) i5-6200U CPU @ 2.30GHz 2.40 GHz, 16.0 GB RAM, and Windows 10.

Around 4 days ago I was eating a lot of popcorn and one of the Hull things got like stuck in my throat. I think it is like behind my tonsil. But it is starting to get Really infected to the point where my voice is breaking most of the time when I talk. I woke up this morning and tried gargling orange juice, cold water, and warm salt water. Nothing has worked at all. I even tried doing things like swallowinga slice bread whole or sting my finger in my throat to try and get it out. I have not even come close. But anyways the infection is getting really bad. This morning when I was gargling the salt water I almost vomited twice, and later I started coughing really bad and vomited a little bit with some mucus too. Please help! It would be the best if I didn’t have to go to any doctor or anything, but if it comes to it later today I’m going to go to the doctor.

I know how to get power i just am stuck on how to find the acceleration to find force in order to find work, or if i am just coming at this wrong. Please I have a test tomorrow on this.

I know i have it, i hear voices yelling at me telling me to killmyself, i get hallucinations, i want to kill myslelf, i have violent visions, i have flashbacks, and many more and i do not prefer it how an i stop this, and nobody knows u have this and nor do i have anybody to care for me nor to tell or talk to so... it was caused by years of depression that was cuased by years on not having friends and being bullied. I would not prefer medication because then my parents and siblings and people would know about this and that would just make this worse

i dont have much character space so i will be brief.

im a now sophomore who has lost all of his friendsAll this with school and other things i am always stressed and full of anxiety. i am depressed and suicidal and im not just asking for attention like all of the other idiots who claim they are suicidal for the pity of others. i have no one to tell nor should anyone know. i do not seek for attention for i do the opposite constantly wanting to not be seen because of fear of being judged. i wear normal clothes and i am not emo. I find nothing for me and realize life is the only true thing i have but i do not wish to have a life of such discomfort. i have great interest in such things of computer editing(videos), photography, snowboarding and few others but those are all i live for now. no one cares for me and it has been this way for years. my parents think of me as a failure and a weird antisocial *****. my siblings hate me. Now to get to the big ****. i often think of ending my life, even tho i know it is notwhat i true want i feel that it is needed. i feel as though i am a burden. i have a short temper with myself now not others just myself i always get mad at myself for things that cannot even be my fault and say "its all because u dont have any friends". not to mentionphysical appearance im overly skinny althought i constantly eat imugly and always sleep deprived. i need help and please i have planned and even brought a blade to my neck many times and i dont getit pls help