* Sapphire *

I had my son 6 months ago and last week sent off his first application for his passport with all relevant documents.

I wonder if you know how long they usually take to process? I am due to fly on the 15th Jan with him. It was a standard application.

Thank you

I was friends with a group of girls until the age of 26 (so 18 until 26) and due to being in an abusive relationship I think I was hard work.

The final straw for one of the girls I was close to was when I was drunk and said a few things that could have been deemed insulting I think. They werent meant to be and were totally taken the wrong way but sadly it wasnt taken the way I meant.

A few days later she decided to cut me off and the others didnt bother to keep up contact with me.

2 years ago I left the horrible guy, (it took a long time as he was very manipulative)

I have started trying to piece my life back together, I got in contact with the girls when I was about 5 months pregnant with a new partners baby. Gradually we ironed out the creases and I apologised and things are pretty much back to normal. I am happy to have them back in my life and one of the girls was my birthing partner.

Last Saturday we had a get together for one of the girls daughters b.days, we were all a bit tipsy.

Its just that this week, the same girl has been off with me...ive text her and sent her emails...but heard nothing, now im paranoid Ive done something wrong!

I cant think what it could be.

She put her cat down weeks ago and is unhappy in her job at the moment but i know shes replied to other people!

theres only one thing i can think it could be....one of the guys at the party was being silly trying to kill a wasp, everyone said kill it...i just said dont...im buddhist - dont beleive in killing anything! i was half joking - toung in cheek!

but now im worried

thanks

Im getting some odd comments here - so I am reposting!

and as a mother what do you think of her behaviour?

I am 31...

from a very very young age my mother was violent towards me - I could not defend myself.

I have several memories, one of when I was approx 3 years old sitting on the sofa, I dont know what made her do it but she point blank punched me straight in the face on the nose.

There were other occassions, when I got older the bullying and beating got worse, she tried to strangle me, banged my head against the wall, pulled me down the stairs by my hair etc...

It got so bad when I was 15 I left home and had nowhere to go so I had to stay with a friend from school and her mum

Homelife with both mum and dad was wierd. My dad rarely spoke to me or engaged me in conversation - neither of them were people who I could go to. Dad was violent to me on several occassions too.

At 18 I moved away and lived on my own in London, I made some friends that I have now. Small amount but good people

8 years ago I had a bit of a breakdown and it all got on top of me, moving house so much (I moved about a lot and never had stability, family stuff etc) I was recommended to see the University counsellor and it was my first session, It all came spilling out and during this I had a flashback about my dad from a word I had remembered had triggered it. It was of a sexual nature and disturbing, so I tried to forget about it as it was too much to deal with.

As of almost 3 months ago I am a new mum (babys dad in Thailand and we are going there for 6 months in Jan)

When he was born I felt such a rush of love and protection, I went to see my parents and dad was acting inappropriately - I ended up telling mum about what happened after she made me tell her.

It all got crazy...I had to have a friend come and get me and my son and take me back to my flat in London!

None of my family will talk to me, they have cut me off.

I sent them an email explaining how I felt etc, I got a text message saying thanks for the email pics of the baby would have been nice (???) that was it.

Mum also text me telling me I was basically a liar and that none of it had happened....(my dad was a policeman so I have no chance against him !!)

9 weeks on I havent heard a thing from her. I have literally done all of this alone with raising my son and absolutely no help. I am lucky he is a good baby! but now I am a mum I see how she failed me.

Why is she like this...??

and as a mother /parent what do you think of her behaviour?

I am 31...

from a very very young age my mother was violent towards me - I could not defend myself.

I have several memories, one of when I was approx 3 years old sitting on the sofa, I dont know what made her do it but she point blank punched me straight in the face on the nose.

There were other occassions, when I got older the bullying and beating got worse, she tried to strangle me, banged my head against the wall, pulled me down the stairs by my hair etc...

It got so bad when I was 15 I left home and had nowhere to go so I had to stay with a friend from school and her mum

Homelife with both mum and dad was wierd. My dad rarely spoke to me or engaged me in conversation - neither of them were people who I could go to. Dad was violent to me on several occassions too.

At 18 I moved away and lived on my own in London, I made some friends that I have now. Small amount but good people

8 years ago I had a bit of a breakdown and it all got on top of me, moving house so much (I moved about a lot and never had stability, family stuff etc) I was recommended to see the University counsellor and it was my first session, It all came spilling out and during this I had a flashback about my dad from a word I had remembered had triggered it. It was of a sexual nature and disturbing, so I tried to forget about it as it was too much to deal with.

As of almost 3 months ago I am a new mum (babys dad in Thailand and we are going there for 6 months in Jan)

When he was born I felt such a rush of love and protection, I went to see my parents and dad was acting inappropriately - I ended up telling mum about what happened after she made me tell her.

It all got crazy...I had to have a friend come and get me and my son and take me back to my flat in London!

None of my family will talk to me, they have cut me off.

I sent them an email explaining how I felt etc, I got a text message saying thanks for the email pics of the baby would have been nice (???) that was it.

Mum also text me telling me I was basically a liar and that none of it had happened....(my dad was a policeman so I have no chance against him !!)

9 weeks on I havent heard a thing from her. I have literally done all of this alone with raising my son and absolutely no help. I am lucky he is a good baby! but now I am a mum I see how she failed me.

Why is she like this...??

I am 31...

from a very very young age my mother was violent towards me - I could not defend myself.

I have several memories, one of when I was approx 3 years old sitting on the sofa, I dont know what made her do it but she point blank punched me straight in the face on the nose.

There were other occassions, when I got older the bullying and beating got worse, she tried to strangle me, banged my head against the wall, pulled me down the stairs by my hair etc...

It got so bad when I was 15 I left home and had nowhere to go so I had to stay with a friend from school and her mum

Homelife with both mum and dad was wierd. My dad rarely spoke to me or engaged me in conversation - neither of them were people who I could go to. Dad was violent to me on several occassions too.

At 18 I moved away and lived on my own in London, I made some friends that I have now. Small amount but good people

8 years ago I had a bit of a breakdown and it all got on top of me, moving house so much (I moved about a lot and never had stability, family stuff etc) I was recommended to see the University counsellor and it was my first session, It all came spilling out and during this I had a flashback about my dad from a word I had remembered had triggered it. It was of a sexual nature and disturbing, so I tried to forget about it as it was too much to deal with.

As of almost 3 months ago I am a new mum (babys dad in Thailand and we are going there for 6 months in Jan)

When he was born I felt such a rush of love and protection, I went to see my parents and dad was acting inappropriately - I ended up telling mum about what happened after she made me tell her.

It all got crazy...I had to have a friend come and get me and my son and take me back to my flat in London!

None of my family will talk to me, they have cut me off.

I sent them an email explaining how I felt etc, I got a text message saying thanks for the email pics of the baby would have been nice (???) that was it.

Mum also text me telling me I was basically a liar and that none of it had happened....(my dad was a policeman so I have no chance against him !!)

9 weeks on I havent heard a thing from her. I have literally done all of this alone with raising my son and absolutely no help. I am lucky he is a good baby! but now I am a mum I see how she failed me.

Why is she like this...??

and as a mother what do you think of her behaviour?

I am 31...

from a very very young age my mother was violent towards me - I could not defend myself.

I have several memories, one of when I was approx 3 years old sitting on the sofa, I dont know what made her do it but she point blank punched me straight in the face on the nose.

There were other occassions, when I got older the bullying and beating got worse, she tried to strangle me, banged my head against the wall, pulled me down the stairs by my hair etc...

It got so bad when I was 15 I left home and had nowhere to go so I had to stay with a friend from school and her mum

Homelife with both mum and dad was wierd. My dad rarely spoke to me or engaged me in conversation - neither of them were people who I could go to. Dad was violent to me on several occassions too.

At 18 I moved away and lived on my own in London, I made some friends that I have now. Small amount but good people

8 years ago I had a bit of a breakdown and it all got on top of me, moving house so much (I moved about a lot and never had stability, family stuff etc) I was recommended to see the University counsellor and it was my first session, It all came spilling out and during this I had a flashback about my dad from a word I had remembered had triggered it. It was of a sexual nature and disturbing, so I tried to forget about it as it was too much to deal with.

As of almost 3 months ago I am a new mum (babys dad in Thailand and we are going there for 6 months in Jan)

When he was born I felt such a rush of love and protection, I went to see my parents and dad was acting inappropriately - I ended up telling mum about what happened after she made me tell her.

It all got crazy...I had to have a friend come and get me and my son and take me back to my flat in London!

None of my family will talk to me, they have cut me off.

I sent them an email explaining how I felt etc, I got a text message saying thanks for the email pics of the baby would have been nice (???) that was it.

Mum also text me telling me I was basically a liar and that none of it had happened....(my dad was a policeman so I have no chance against him !!)

9 weeks on I havent heard a thing from her. I have literally done all of this alone with raising my son and absolutely no help. I am lucky he is a good baby! but now I am a mum I see how she failed me.

Why is she like this...??

Had a violent home life (both parents)

I had a baby almost 3 months ago now. Things have been rocky for years with my parents, I had an abusive relationship until 2 years ago, I left him and took this man to trial for the abuse. I had to fly back from Thaialnd and was 7 months pregnant at the trial in Feb just gone and had a lot on my plate.

My parents werent really there for me when I told them the things he had done to me.

I left home young but I did try and almost try really hard with them and so desperately wanted to have a normal family. But it was papering over cracks the whole time.

I remember mum punching me in the face (on my nose) when I was 2-3 years old there was other violence I was told I was a handful until I left home at 15 ended up living with friends and their parents as I had nowhere to go and left properly to move to London at 18.

I had night terrors, when I was little and spontaniously cried while in class when I was 5-6 and lied to the teacher that my tooth hurt!? I knew something wasnt right then.

Over the years there has been issues, and also theres always been a very strained relationship with my dad and he was violent too. Plus he had acted and said inappropriate sexual comments over the years.

Several years ago I had therapy and had a flashback from nowhere when talking about my family life regarding my dad - it was NOT nice and quite a shock, it was a sexual act

when my son was born my dad made a sexual comment in front of mum and me and that was the final straw. She probed me and made me tell her, I had told her it wasnt the first time he had been inappropriate.

She made me tell her (kept on at me) and in the end it came out. I didnt want to say anything but for the sake of my son I told her some of it.

She beleieved me at first and confronted my dad and asked my sister.

Literally none of my family will speak to me now. Even my cousins wont and my sister has cut me off.

I have been alone with my baby with no help at all and my babys dad is in Thailand (we go in Jan to see him) my mother has turned her back so completely.

I wonder, do you think she knew what was going on? it was like she beleived me at first, and also the violence when I was young by her was bullying so was it possible she had a grudge cos she knew? what should I do?

thanks so much

Had a violent home life (both parents)

I had a baby almost 3 months ago now. Things have been rocky for years with my parents, I had an abusive relationship until 2 years ago, I left him and took this man to trial for the abuse. I had to fly back from Thaialnd and was 7 months pregnant at the trial in Feb just gone and had a lot on my plate.

My parents werent really there for me when I told them the things he had done to me.

I left home young but I did try and almost try really hard with them and so desperately wanted to have a normal family. But it was papering over cracks the whole time.

I remember mum punching me in the face (on my nose) when I was 2-3 years old there was other violence I was told I was a handful until I left home at 15 ended up living with friends and their parents as I had nowhere to go and left properly to move to London at 18.

I had night terrors, when I was little and spontaniously cried while in class when I was 5-6 and lied to the teacher that my tooth hurt!? I knew something wasnt right then.

Over the years there has been issues, and also theres always been a very strained relationship with my dad and he was violent too. Plus he had acted and said inappropriate sexual comments over the years.

Several years ago I had therapy and had a flashback from nowhere when talking about my family life regarding my dad - it was NOT nice and quite a shock, it was a sexual act

when my son was born my dad made a sexual comment in front of mum and me and that was the final straw. She probed me and made me tell her, I had told her it wasnt the first time he had been inappropriate.

She made me tell her (kept on at me) and in the end it came out. I didnt want to say anything but for the sake of my son I told her some of it.

She beleieved me at first and confronted my dad and asked my sister.

Literally none of my family will speak to me now. Even my cousins wont and my sister has cut me off.

I have been alone with my baby with no help at all and my babys dad is in Thailand (we go in Jan to see him) my mother has turned her back so completely.

I wonder, do you think she knew what was going on? it was like she beleived me at first, and also the violence when I was young by her was bullying so was it possible she had a grudge cos she knew? what should I do?

thanks so much

Had a violent home life (both parents)

I had a baby almost 3 months ago now. Things have been rocky for years with my parents, I had an abusive relationship until 2 years ago and took this man to trial for the abuse. I was 7 months pregnant at the trial in Feb just gone and had a lot on my plate.

My parents werent really there for me when I told them the things he had done to me.

I left home young but I did try and almost try really hard with them and so desperately wanted to have a normal family. But it was papering over cracks the whole time.

I remember mum punching me in the face (on my nose) when I was 2-3 years old there was other violence I was told I was a handful until I left home at 15 ended up living with friends and their parents as I had nowhere to go and left properly to move to London at 18.

I had night terrors, spontaniously cried while in class when I was 5-6 and lied to the teacher that my tooth hurt!? I knew something wasnt right then.

Over the years there has been issues, and also theres always been a very strained relationship with my dad and he was violent too. Plus he had acted and said inappropriate sexual comments over the years.

Several years ago I had therapy and had a flashback from nowhere when talking about my family life regarding my dad - it was NOT nice and quite a shock, it was a sexual act

when my son was born my dad made a sexual comment in front of mum and me and that was the final straw. She probed me and made me tell her, I had told her it wasnt the first time he had been inappropriate.

She made me tell her (kept on at me) and in the end it came out. I didnt want to say anything but for the sake of my son I told her some of it.

She beleieved me at first and confronted my dad and asked my sister.

Literally none of my family will speak to me now. Even my cousins wont and my sister has cut me off.

I have been alone with my baby with no help at all and my babys dad is in Thailand (we go in Jan to see him) my mother has turned her back so completely.

I wonder, do you think she knew what was going on? what should I do?

thanks so much

To Thailand - Bangkok and the islands

He will be 8 months old, My main concern is sterilising his bottle for nighttime and also what to feed him in the days etc??

We are visiting daddy for the first time and the island I am going to is small and only has one supermarket with limited bits

Any tips would be great please thanks

My son and I will be spending Christmas alone this year (flying out to Thailand on the 1st Jan 11 to see his daddy.)

My parents are toxic (very long story) so for his safety have kept them away.

So its just us....

Im slightly apprehensive and a bit down about it! and my friends will be in Thailand for Christmas and new year so we will be alone.

My son will be 8 months old then, what can I do to make it nice for me and him....as it will be his first Christmas,

thanks

spending Christmas alone this year (flying out to Thailand on the 1st Jan 11 to see his daddy.)

My parents are toxic (very long story) so for his safety have kept them away.

So its just us....

Im slightly apprehensive and a bit down about it! and my friends will be in Thailand for Christmas and new year so we will be alone.

My son will be 8 months old then, what can I do to make it nice for me and him....as it will be his first Christmas,

thanks

As you may know, I had a baby 10 weeks ago, I had a lot going on during my pregnancy and havent had the best relationship with my parents growing up.

When my son was born it brought a lot of things up and brought back memories and abuse. All I wanted to do was protect my precious son.

For years I have tried to act normal, be good to my parents, make an effort etc but its always been strained.

My Dad in particular is odd...pervy and we have some previous issues, he acts inappropriately and things happened when I was younger.

The final straw for me was a highly inappropriate sexual comment to me when around the time I had just had my baby.

Mum grilled me and probed me to tell her (as she knew there was more to it)

I told her some things after she kept saying ''tell me, tell me'' (she doesnt know the half of it)

Of course, my Dad has said I am a liar...he used to be a policeman and worked in child protection so I have no chance!!

My son is now 10 weeks old and the person who has upset me the most is my mother!! I have heard NOTHING from her! since she sent me a message saying ''it didnt happen''...

She was violent to me from the age of 2 upwards, but I tried to forgive her. I am totally gutted at the stiuation. None of the family will talk to me.

Sounds silly but its my birthday soon and its going to be awful. I do have some good friends but I dont see them all the time.

I feel like all this is my fault.....please give me your opinion on the situation with my mother....

thanks

As you may know, I had a baby 10 weeks ago, I had a lot going on during my pregnancy and havent had the best relationship with my parents growing up.

When my son was born it brought a lot of things up and brought back memories and abuse. All I wanted to do was protect my precious son.

For years I have tried to act normal, be good to my parents, make an effort etc but its always been strained.

My Dad in particular is odd...pervy and we have some previous issues, he acts inappropriately and things happened when I was younger.

The final straw for me was a highly inappropriate sexual comment to me when around the time I had just had my baby.

Mum grilled me and probed me to tell her (as she knew there was more to it)

I told her some things after she kept saying ''tell me, tell me'' (she doesnt know the half of it)

Of course, my Dad has said I am a liar...he used to be a policeman and worked in child protection so I have no chance!!

My son is now 10 weeks old and the person who has upset me the most is my mother!! I have heard NOTHING from her! since she sent me a message saying ''it didnt happen''...

She was violent to me from the age of 2 upwards, but I tried to forgive her. I am totally gutted at the stiuation. None of the family will talk to me.

Sounds silly but its my birthday soon and its going to be awful. I do have some good friends but I dont see them all the time.

I feel like all this is my fault.....please give me your opinion on the situation with my mother....

thanks

My partner and babys dad lives in Thailand, I am here in the UK as I had my baby here and then will go back to Thailand in January...

Communication is sometimes hard due to cost of calls etc so we sometimes use email and text message until I am back there! ;-)

Wierd thing is we havent spoken since our son was born as I have been having problems with my phone. I text him last night.

Today I got a really wierd random message from a number I didnt recognise..I googled it and it looks like a number from Africa!!?

Hes not in Africa and hes Thai / Malaysian...but neither codes are for there!

Here is the code and the message - do you think its from him?

(to UK) +22037.....

''yes darling, im going to start looking for a better house, and i will inform you darling, i love you so much and my baby xxxgmsc''

I cant get hold of him to ask him and I am confused!

what do you think?? its a nice message lol

My partner and babys dad lives in Thailand, I am here in the UK as I had my baby here and then will go back to Thailand in January...

Communication is sometimes hard due to cost of calls etc so we sometimes use email and text message until I am back there! ;-)

Wierd thing is we havent spoken since our son was born as I have been having problems with my phone. I text him last night.

Today I got a really wierd random message from a number I didnt recognise..I googled it and it looks like a number from Africa!!?

Hes not in Africa and hes Thai / Malaysian...but neither codes are for there!

Here is the code and the message - do you think its from him?

(to UK) +22037.....

''yes darling, im going to start looking for a better house, and i will inform you darling, i love you so much and my baby xxxgmsc''

I cant get hold of him to ask him and I am confused

what do you think?? its a nice message lol

What is reverse psychology? someone mentioned it the other day and how does it work?

I think I am being manipulated and your help would be good

do police use it in questioning too? My dad is a policeman lol

What is reverse psychology? someone mentioned it the other day and how does it work?

I think I am being manipulated and your help would be good

Thanks

My baby is 9 weeks old

He had the heel prick blood test and its only weeks later they choose to tell me that he has what could be the Haemoglobin E Trait. Now no one has elaborated yet but they will call me tomorrow

I am really worried, if he has children this could affect them if he falls in love with someone with a similar or same blood disorder,

What are the chances of this.

He is half Thai and apparently this blood disorder is common in SE Asia and means he will also be more immune to malaria.

I am really worried though. Any advice please. thanks

have quite a few issues relating to abuse by family and an ex that have surfaced and need to be dealt with.

Not the best time as I have just had a baby and its all out now. Im very upset and I have noticed that when I am really down as I am now. I eat more - I cant help it

I used to be on anti depressants...and they make me put on weight which is a vicious circle! I tend to eat more crisps and sugar (sweets) and seem to have no will to stop.

This sounds really silly but I am so down and have no family or support

I will be gettting therapy (childcare permitting) but can you advise anything?

thanks