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"Anonymiss"

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  • Why can't my sister and I ever seem to get along?

    My sister and I are about 5-6 years apart (if you want to count the few months in between) and her and I have never got along for any real period of time. When I was a little girl she would beat the hell out of me when my parents left her to watch me and my brother as kids, She would do cruel things to me like lock me in a room all day with no restroom or food. She would praise and cottle my brother (who is a year older than me) and let him beat me up me too. I would later tell my parents about it and they would tell her about it but mainly write it off as siblings not getting along. Many year later, I'm 23 and her 30, she still has this need to treat me like garbage. She moved back home a few months ago to help mom and I pay some bills given that dad passed away but ever since she walked in the door the ***** has been nothing but trouble. She calls me fat and ugly and says she can get men and I can't because "i'm ugly" Mind her, she only gets scum bags and losers who use her for her money but I digress. Its not that her calling me names that bothers me, its her age. Don't you think by 30 you wouldnt be back at home or even calling someone else names like a highschool tart? Dont you think someone of that age would be above and matured past that? She also screams at my mom (whoms house SHES IN) and yet picks fights with me and my brother when shes bored. Like she runs her mouth or throws her 2 cents in a situation that has nothing to do with her. I've tried to ignore her, I've tried leaving the room and going into mine but the ***** just follows me and screams at my door for 10 minutes. I just completely despise her. Not really for anything she does to me but just how she acts. Shes 2 faced too all her friends.... she spends money on them and the second their back is turned shes saying every terrible thing about a person you could say about them. She always does this to us, her family to her friends. Shes just a disgusting fake person. She wears pounds of make up to cover up how she hates herself and yet she acts like her feces don't stink. Ever. I honestly do believe she leads an empty life of self loathing where she doesnt feel accepted by her family because she insists on pushing us away to pretend to be something shes not (rich, always had nice things, ect) and she alienates her friends cause shes not one of them (comes from a nice family with money, ect) Like every outlet of her life is fake and she doesnt make easy on herself to fix or let someone love her or help her. Its always someone else's fault or what have you. My dad died hoping his kids would someday get along and I tried for YEARS to look past her flaws. I tried to love her and be her friend but by 30 if you're still acting like a teenage idiot I have no sympathy for you. May my father forgive me someday or someday she can forgive herself and grow up. Not even my father's last wish is enough for her to change. I have no respect her. I hate her. My brother has grown to hate her as well. My mom cries because we argue and I try to avoid fighting with my sister for mom's sake. My mom won't kick her out cause its her daughter and doesnt want to hurt her feelings....what about my moms feelings? What her two other kids' feelings? I stay at home cause I'm in college and I bust my hump working on top of it to help my mom. My brother just got a job and so my sister can get the hell out! We don;t need her or her drama....my mom doesnt see it that way. Me and my brother have been pushed by that witch sister of mine. Example, "Hit me! Do it! I'll call the cops!" Then you go to walk away she starts up with, "Walk away like a coward! blah blah" Its like pushes our buttons for attention. I would never hit my sister but when she puts us all in a rage of seeing red and wanting to destroy everything she really aggs us on. I DONT GET IT. I dont understnad her and I never will. I dont care to anymore. We dont need her at home, I hate her guts, she lacks humility, shame, and self control. She also lacks the ability to behave like an adult. Why? Why do you think she acts this way? Where have we as a family gone wrong? Shes the only one who acts this way....

    2 AnswersFamily9 years ago
  • Should I be angry with my mom for talking to another man after my dad passed away?

    My father passed away 1 year ago 3 days ago. I stumbled upon a strange email from my mothers yahoo account. I opened the web browser and it was right on her inbox page. Don't get me wrong, I respect my mother and her privacy but when I see several emails titled, "Hi there sexy (moms nickname that her CLOSE friends call her)" Some dude calling my mom sexy aint cool and at first I thought it was douche bag so I was gonna open the email and email him myself from my account to tell him to piss off. (My mom was harassed by some guy a couple of years ago in person and over the net you gotta understand why I opened it. I thought it was him again) However when I opened the email it was all her revealing stuff about me and my siblings. Nothing too detailed or personal but it was about her life. He gave the same information and to be honest, there was nothing explicit in their emails back and forth. BUT what made me feel unsettled is that the emails were only dated from a few days ago, and he was calling her "cutie" and "sweetie" and "beautiful." Something a stranger on the internet shouldn't say, MY DAD didn't even address her as that and they were married almost 30 years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    But what I am really upset about here is folks that she is reaching to the internet for someone new. Shes already looking for someone new. It was like the last 30 years meant nothing to her with my dad and it pisses me off. I understand my mom is a person too and she has needs and theres nothing wrong with that. But this soon? When my dad was alive I can recall many years ago when we first got a computer my dad would ask me to check my mom's stuff. i didn't want to cause I didnt want to disrespect her and I wouldnt want her doing that to me. However, my mom had a brief history of cheating on my dad years before we got the computer so I also too understood his side. So I checked her stuff and sure enough she was talking to some guy (different one, this all happened like 10 years ago) My dad was hurt and yet furious. Nothing happened between my mom and this person but they were talking about things that my brain as a 14 year old (even now as a 24 year old) wished to have unseen.

    Now with my father passed it seems my mom is back to her ways again. The notion of her moving on was inevitable which is fine but I feel like shes disrespecting my dad all over again. My dad didnt like that crap when he was alive so why the hell would he like it now? It's like shes ready to move on in a hurry and you know what? I cried today when I read those emails. I feel like shes betraying my dad and I want to tell this guy to **** off (though he has done nothing wrong, they met on a dating website and hes a widow too from what I read) to be loyal to my dad. It's not my place to talk to my mom about this and its none of my business, I know. I'm just hurt and upset for my dad that she would wait to do this crap after he passed away. I'm disgusted.

    3 AnswersFamily9 years ago
  • I can't let go of the past (my ex)...(this is a long one..) Any advice at all?

    Me and my ex had a really terrible nasty fight back in March 2011. Him and I broke up the same week my dad passed away which has made grieving for my father very difficult. Its like when I think of my dad and smile I instantly think of my jerk off ex and vice versa. It's been almost a year and I still feel great sadness over both situations. The nasty fight we had consisted of him being too emotionally dependent on his mothers (step and real one) example, we would have an argument no matter who was right or wrong he would vent to one of them. (mainly his step mom) which is fine if thats his comfort zone. The problem? she call me up and harass me and scream at me, text me, ect calling me names and telling me how I'm doing everything wrong. Prior to this her and I were really good friends. Anyway, I told him about it and told him hurt I was because he betrayed me by promising me he wouldnt do it again (this was a long going problem in our relationship) and didnt have my back in telling her to back off and to talk to me like that. He instead told me, "I'm not going to get mad at her for the same things I'm mad about" WHAT?!?! Our relationship was ours! I wasnt dating his family!!! It was none of her business and he would also tell me every time I would need him to talk to his family about they hurt me ( it was HIS family not mine to deal with. I wasn't about to argue with them and disrespect them) that quote, "I'm not gonna fight with my family cause you want me to!" Why would I want you to fight with your family? The the only thing I wanted from him was TO TALK TO THEM. If it brewed into a fight (they are very strange people I'll explain shortly) it was beyond my control. Reguardless, he was to have my back and as I would have his if my family was ever nasty to him. (They never were, they minded their business and I took care of my own problems. I never cried to them about anything) It was like a constant battle to be in his life or have his respect. Like I compete with his step mom for communication (Whenever we fought or talk about anything, he would tell her what he would really feel and just tell me whatever I wanted to hear and to this day I have no idea why...) and a battle with his real mom over affection. Like she would try to purposely anger me by (this is the strange stuff some of it anyway) holding his hand out in public (hes a 20 year old man) sit on his lap, kiss him on the mouth, and hold on to him in the ways I would hold on to him cause I was his fricken girlfriend! She would also give me dirty looks when he would show my affection and was choosey about showing my any when she was around. (He also denied that too when I called him on it) It made me uncomfortable so I told him about it. He got defensive and nasty with me and said that its my fault I hate my family and I dont love them the way he loves his. Why he brought my family into it is beyond me....though he did say he would talk to her. Guess what? Nothing changed.

    It just hurt me that I was always came second...sure I was nasty back only after becoming frustrated after a year and a half of this circus. Sure, I made mistakes, sure I was wrong a good portion of the time. But I never involved my family into my personal life. I was always honest with what I wanted and felt. Yet I'm the criminal? The only thing I could say I was terrible for not being honest about was a drug experimentation.

    His mothers are both users of cocaine. His real mom is a wannabe born again christian. She sleeps around for coke and booze and cheats on her husband and has the nerve to go to church. (He says hes "obligated to love her"...youre not obligated to love anyone in this world)

    His step mom is disabled and has muscular distrophy. She uses coke to ease her pain. When coke does the opposite....whatever. Well his step mom and I were friends she let TRY some. So I did, you only live once. After I felt bad and wanted to tell him...she advised that I shouldnt cause he get very angry. She said, "DONT WORRY, I'll NEVER TELL HIM." Right....

    So I followed her advice since she was a good friend after all. A year later well...when she called me up and screamed at me (as said in the begining of this novel lol) I did what my ex didnt do. Told her POLITELY to mind her business. Then she was out to get me. She told him a bunch of lies saying I stole money from her (when I lent her some without ever asking for it back..) stole coke, her pills, and told her family she owes me money.....and he believed her. She did all this knowing my dad just passed away. All because I didnt scream back at her when she harassed me like she wanted me to and told her off like a lady....My ex took her side saying she does drugs cause shes in pain..(You dont use coke when you have a muscular diesese! he believes her on that too!) So in the end I felt defeated.Its been a year and I still think about him. Its made so

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating9 years ago
  • My ex is a jerk, this is how. Am I wrong?

    Me and my ex split back in March 2011. Him and I deinfintely had our share of problems. He was a momma's boy and I am a honest person. (When it comes to situational things 99% of the time) Him and I dated for a year and a half and around the last 5 months we fell apart. ( He is in the Navy) Every time him and I argue he

    would go back and tell his step mother, (A cocaine user ALL THE TIME like his real mom) about our fights. There's nothing wrong with venting to someone you're close to or family but its a problem when that person, (His stepmom) would call me up screaming at me about how I'm doing everything wrong and I'm an asshole and

    very immature, ect cause I fight with her step son. Saying how it could put him in danger cause he isnt thinking clearly ect. Well thats what he signed up for when he joined the Navy and being with me was someting HE wanted, not her. SO ANYWAY,(This this 7 months before we broke up) I did experiment with cocaine myself

    with her, his step mom (first time only time) and I felt bad after. I told his step mom that I wanted to tell him and she strongly advised against it saying, "OH! I would NEVER tell him. His mom does it and he doesnt respect her, dont worry, I would will NEVER tell him." I still felt like I wanted to tell him but I took her advice

    because I knew I would NEVER do it again. (I never did...) His real mom is a "born again Christian" is married to his step father who is also one and is heavily into the bible. His real mom cheats on her husband every weekend (Drinks at bars and sleeps with guys for coke) then has the nerve to go to church on Sunday with his

    stepfather. My ex acknowledges her hypocrisy and calls her a "loser" while she called me "ugly" and that her son could "do better" behind his and my back. ( I found out through his grandmother/stepmother) Though I'm supposed to be ok with this? I told him about it and felt he should talk to her about it given that it was his

    mother and family. Then he responded, "Well I didn;t hear it..." Then it ends there. Its like he has to see it and hear it before he believes it. (Thought my word was NEVER enough) before he would ever defend me. His real mother would give me funny or dirty looks when it came to him commenting how we would spend our lives

    together ( He proposed to me BTW) in a way that was dub-founded or jealous. ( He would tell his stepmom who his real moms and I were quote, "Jealous" of each other. I'm sorry but when your lover's parent is holding their parent's hand in front of you and sitting their lap in front of you and also kissing them on the lips it make

    you uncomfortable, NOT JEALOUS, ITS CREEPY) My ex would also often lie about ( we were also long distance) the female friends he had....(which was COMPLETELY fine with me but....but why lie about it if nothing is going on?) He said we would marry October 2011 (during his leave) so we could live together down on the

    south, Mississippi. Of course, he changed his mind and decided to tell his step mom instead....which through her I found out instead of him (which is the way it should have been) which also made me lose trust in him. Why the heck would I have to find out from a guy what he wants from his mother/step mother? Anyway, my ex

    and I fought enough (which he broke his promies to keep our relationshipo between us yet AGAIN) his mother called me up ect as I told you earlier. I finally told his stepmom politely to mind her business (Shes quote, "Big Bad Kerri") who doesnt take crap from anyone. Once I told her and I quote, "The issues Steven and I have

    is between us and no one else, please respect that." Shes didnt like that and told him about my cocaine experitation. If I did wrong and it was the concequneces I faced it was all fine with me but she made me the villain. He called me up "hardly admitting she was wrong until I badgered him he admitted "slightly" about how she

    was "maybe" wrong. He went on to tell me how immature I was because I didnt live on my own (never mind the bills I paid) on my onwn and how he did. I instantly reminded him that if wasnt for the Navy he would livnig back at home with his mommy at the same place ( and job) I was. That he was more "mature" than me cause

    he paid his way. (Nevermind the 50 hours I work and the morgae I pay) He would be back in the same shoes I am if it wasnt for the Navy. He's dating this new girl now which is fine, despite how he treated me in the same week my dad died atleast hes warm. I wish the best for him. ( I mean that honestly) I just feel horrible and

    betrayed, Am I wrong in this?

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating9 years ago
  • I really miss my dad but im an Atheist. Help?

    My father passed almost a year ago. Ever since he passed I've done nothing but think about him every single day. People tell me I'll get over it that time heals all wounds or to give him to God but the truth is I do not believe in God. when I hear this "God" needs an angel nonsense it infuriates me. That if God needed an angel so bad then could he not just make another one? My father went to church every sunday, believed in God more than anyone else I know yet this God person made my father suffer a very horrible death. He had a kidney failure and rotted from the inside out. His organs began to all shut down and could no longer breathe on his own. It took him 3 days for him to die. 3 long agonizing days.... so no one better not tell me this God bullshit. I have had a friend murdered, uncles die, and other family members die off in horrendous ways. I have had a problem with God since I was 10 years old. Aside from that all I can really say is I really really miss my dad. I hardly leave the house because everything I see and hear reminds me of him. it's been almost a year and I still cry everyday. when he was alive me and my father fought a lot and I spent years hating him. it wasn't until 2 weeks before he died that he finally apologized about all the mean things he did to my mother and me my siblings. and when he did that I forgive him for everything. it just hurts because it took that to get him to apologize. it was like it was too late to have a relationship with him. I have a lot of guilt over the hatred I had for him. I guess now it's because im older that it was easier to forgive him now than it would've been 8 years ago. (im 23 now) if he had apologize back then. I know I'm being incredibly selfish but I really don't want to suffer or cry everyday anymore. I've tried everything I could to get over the grief. I have tried counseling, talking to friends, medications. I just miss him terribly. I just want to end my suffering if it is me ending my life. Help?

    9 AnswersFamily9 years ago
  • Anyone know a good website for anime that is compatible with an android?

    I have an android lg optimus and no, most websites don't work. I can't install video players that aren't already on my phone. Btw crunchy roll doesn't have anything I like or watch. Youtube has been wiped out. Help?

    2 AnswersComics & Animation10 years ago
  • My sister is confused about calories help?

    Ok, my sister has been trying to lose weight for the last year. The few diets she tried helped but the weight didn't fall completely off or stay off. She's 5' 4 and 236 pounds and she's been asking me how many calories should she eat a day for someone of her stature to lose weight to which I have no idea. I just eat whatever and my weights fine. I think her metabolism is shot and why I have no clue on that either. Anyone?

    2 AnswersDiet & Fitness10 years ago
  • What animes are really romantic?

    Hey there, I was just wondering what's a really great romantic anime? I've seen Fuushigi Yuugi and loved it! I've watched Peach Girl and it was awesome and sweet. However, I am kind of a picky person when it comes to anime. I can't stand overly goofy animes or ones that take place in highschool....I'm bored of them. I enjoy dramatic, serious, and romantic animes. Sure a little humor is wonderful but not every moment of every episode ya know? I've also seen Inuyasha too...help anyone? Armitage III was really amazing too, I would appreciate any feedback or suggestions!!! Thx!!! :)

    5 AnswersComics & Animation10 years ago
  • Should I apologize to him?

    There's this guy I work with and we hit it off as being pretty good friends ever since we met late last year. He's been going through some pretty crappy stuff and I don't ever give him a hard time about anything for that reason. Until he invited me out to see a movie with him and I tried for days before the day we planned to go so we could figure out a good time and what movie to see. He never answered me....he blew me off. I was hurt but I never brought it up or mentioned it cause I know he has a lot on him. A few weeks ago he asked again but canceled saying his grandfather needed his help. That's ok in my book so we replanned again a few days later. The night before he cancled again cause his ex wanted to see him. She's pregnant but possibly not his (a part of his problems she's an immature vindictive loose brat. Like all his exes) he said he had to cause it would look in court incase its his baby. I was really hurt by it...not so much him seeing his ex but its like he thinks only his schedule is important and his problems only matter. I got angry and said "listen,you know what days I'm available and how available I am. I'm not gonna make you feel bad cause I'm not one of those little higjschool mentality girls you're used to dealing with however, I have feelings and yes, they get hurt too. Good day to you" he didn't text back and hasn't since. He's still nice to me at work but I avoided him cause I thought he got what he deserved for disrespecting me and my time. (I would always have to double check with plans cause he would go without telling me anything. I always found he would cancel the night before) but now I'm feeling bad and miss our closeness. He wont bring it up or sit with me on break anymore. Should I apologize? Should he? Its been like a month or so ago.

    1 AnswerFriends10 years ago
  • I lost my father 4 months ago, will it ever get better?

    I lost my dad back in March and I'm still unable to stop crying. When he first past I found myself unable to cry. Sure I wept the night he died and I held his hand as he ceased breathing after removing life support. I cried slightly at his funeral and strange part was that none of it felt real to me. Until 3 weeks ago one night I remember how my dad would pick me up out of bed when I was little at night when I had night terrors and craddle me. I would sleep in the room between my parents. He would ask me, "what's wrong little cub?" (My dad had a long running inside joke with the family about bears, he was papa bear of course) I've had insomnia for as long as I could remmber and he always helped me sleep as a little girl. Its memories like that that make me miss him so terribly. I find myself now crying so much I get sick. The relationship I had with dad was complicated. Him and I would argue like hell as I got older and him even sicker. He had diabetes for about 20 years and in the end his organs started to shut down. In a fit of rage sometime back I said he should die already that he's unbearable to live with. I've felt guilty about it since that day. I feel even more guilty leaving him all alone in the hospital room after he died. I looked back one time and the machines were showing flat lines and him lying there with tears rolling his face. It haunts me, it tortures me. I miss him, I love him. I'm sorry for leaving him all alone there. I dream about him all the time. I'm lost.

    9 AnswersFamily10 years ago
  • Should he get the boot?

    I've been pretty friendly to this guy at work for sometime now. We sometimes hang out outside of work. About a month ago we made plans to see a movie. I made the effort to get it set up by checking out play times and moving my schedule around. For 2 days I texted him movie play times and asked what he wanted to do. I never got a reply....which I know was on purpose cause he uses his phone every day. I was hurt but let it go cause he has some heavy stuff on him right now (and then) like a psychotic ex who is pregnant with a baby that's possibly his. (She slept around a lot) so I didn't want to make it worse for him. Now, just past week it was the same crap...almost. he invited me out again and we were to go out on Wednesday but he canceled cause his grandfather needed his help on a job. (Sadly this guy is a workaholic too) I was understanding about it and said ok. He suggested Friday. So for the next 2 days I looked up movies and such and I waited 2 days for him to get in contact with me. Nothing, so Thursday night I texted him if Friday was still good and he canceled on me again cause his ex wanted to meet up....he said hes only being civil with her so it looks good in court (he wants custody of the baby incase its his) which I also understood to an extent but I was kinda hurt by it. If she's so horrible why drop everything for her? I got little upset cause he never told me in the last 2 days that he could have and the feelings of him blowing me off a month previous came to surface. He texted me "this Friday ok set in stone" after I told him what days I have off from work and to get back to me when he's ready to have a social life. So I then repiled "I have a docotrs appointment at 1 text me before 1 so I can just meet up with you since I'm already out." No amswer it was late so I assumed he fell asleep. Which is fine. The next day I never heard from him and when 4pm hit I got upset again and thanked him sarcastically for letting me know. He just made excuses.

    3 AnswersLaptops & Notebooks10 years ago
  • Can someone help me remember this anime?

    Ok when I was really young I was watching the sci fi channel (about 12 years ago) late at night and couldn't sleep. There was this anime that was on that I was really into but for the life of me cant remeber. It was about woman who was a cop/andriod (I think becomes one after an accident) and tries to carry on with her life. My memorry is very limited so bare with me. There's also another part of it that stands in my mind where she was shooting and fighting abunch of thugs and her flesh is worn away (burned, bullets eating away at her) as her partner (maybe love interest?) Sees what she really is for the first time. She's ashamed and begs him not look at her as her body once again was mangled and her robotic parts are bloody and showing. It also took place very far into the future. There's another scene not long after her battle she gets a new body and says to her partner (?) " look at the new body dad gave me" she then has the ability to fly and aerial attacks. Her dad I'm assuming was the scientist/doctor who saves her life the first time and " gave her life again and was reborn" for which she calls him dad for that reason (?) I'm very sorry if this isn't much to go on but I know there's some anime fans out who are very well, anime savvy. I just remeber watching it and really enjoying it.

    Thanks all!

    2 AnswersComics & Animation1 decade ago
  • Is he really attracted to me or just being nice?

    I know I have mentioned this a time or two before here on yahoo answrrs but things have become....interesting. Here's how: this guy I've come to know from work (ill make this short as I can lol) he took me out right after (like the next day)he broke up with his girlfriend about 2 months ago. He took me out to cheer me up cause my dad passed away and the whole time he told me how he thought I would be this wonderful pure honest friend and how he enjoys having me around. He stated he wanted to be single for awhile (later said to me he wasn't sure if he wants to be single or not like a month ago wtf right?) Come to find out his girlfriend was pregnant and claimed it was his. He left her cause he got tired of her lying to him about hanging out with her ex all the time. An ex she says she "needs" around for protection.....that's what a significant other is for....she's had her ex around since highschool. Anyway he went back to her in case it is his baby and I can't blame him for that. I don't want to be a home wrecker so I've distanced myself from him because I have feelings for him by avoiding him in the breakroom, stopped texting him, staying away from his department at work the most I can, and cutting conversations short. Despite this he seeks me out at work and always hugs me hello and goodbye. He rubs my back sometimes as we are casually walking and talking and he always wants to know why I'm sad or crying at work if i ever am. (Given the loss of my father and how I got the strength to leave an emotionally abusive relationship) he insists that he likes having me around and says that Im the most honest person he knows. He does all this yet he's with her....I don't what to do or what to expect. I dont want to say anything in case I'm wrong you know? I don't want to imply anything cause I don't want to over step my boundries and intrude on his life. I'm incredibly confused. Maybe I'm confusing care with attraction? I dont know....help???

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating1 decade ago
  • Is he really attracted to me or just being nice?

    I know I have mentioned this a time or two before here on yahoo answrrs but things have become....interesting. Here's how: this guy I've come to know from work (ill make this short as I can lol) he took me out right after (like the next day)he broke up with his girlfriend about 2 months ago. He took me out to cheer me up cause my dad passed away and the whole time he told me how he thought I would be this wonderful pure honest friend and how he enjoys having me around. He stated he wanted to be single for awhile (later said to me he wasn't sure if he wants to be single or not like a month ago wtf right?) Come to find out his girlfriend was pregnant and claimed it was his. He left her cause he got tired of her lying to him about hanging out with her ex all the time. An ex she says she "needs" around for protection.....that's what a significant other is for....she's had her ex around since highschool. Anyway he went back to her in case it is his baby and I can't blame him for that. I don't want to be a home wrecker so I've distanced myself from him because I have feelings for him by avoiding him in the breakroom, stopped texting him, staying away from his department at work the most I can, and cutting conversations short. Despite this he seeks me out at work and always hugs me hello and goodbye. He rubs my back sometimes as we are casually walking and talking and he always wants to know why I'm sad or crying at work if i ever am. (Given the loss of my father and how I got the strength to leave an emotionally abusive relationship) he insists that he likes having me around and says that Im the most honest person he knows. He does all this yet he's with her....I don't what to do or what to expect. I dont want to say anything in case I'm wrong you know? I don't want to imply anything cause I don't want to over step my boundries and intrude on his life. I'm incredibly confused. Maybe I'm confusing care with attraction? I dont know....help???

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating1 decade ago
  • What do I do about this misfortune?

    On march 22 of last month my dad passed away. I was dating a Navy man for about a year and half up until then. He knew my dad was sick but he broke up with me cause he, "Wanted to stop feeling guilty talking to or hanging out with other women." (He said it was my fault he felt that way...whatever) Anyway the night my dad died I called him and told him and he said he would be there for me and to call him whenever I needed him. Not long after that I did try calling him many occasions and would become angry that I "Kept calling him while he was busy." "Busy" being out with his friends and seeing movies, ect. I tried calling him again and he kept forwarding me to voicemail. I got pissed off so I borrowed a friends phone to call he answered just fine. His excuse was that he was sick and was trying to sleep. He answered the other number because he thought it was one of his instructors.....with a 919 area code. (Note hes in Mississippi. Yeah, really.) He didnt sound sick to me and we got into a huge argument. We never really spoke again after that. He never called me before or after that. I finally did speak to him again and his excuse for not calling me was that "He was too busy" and that "He only gets 2 days of the week to be with his friends" Meanwhile it only takes a few minutes to check on someone whos dad just died. I was infuriated beyond belief of how selfish and immature he has become since he went into the Navy. He said he didnt call too because he was mad at me about our fight. OK fair enough, but if someone cares about someone you put that crap aside and listen. It didnt occur to him that maybe I said what I said out of hurt and because I miss my dad. He just couldnt be bothered. He came home on a leave last week and didnt make plans to see me or even call me. Meanwhile he wasnt busy enough before he came home to make plans with another girl to see her on his 3rd day home. He went on a date with her....we only broke up 3 weeks before. I called him up and I spoke my peace to him and I told him I dont want him back and that hes a jerk and a self absorbed mama's boy. (longer story) He didnt care about that I had to say, he didnt even apologize about not being there for me when dad passed. I just told him it was done and that I don't even want to be his friend cause he didnt even know how to be boyfriend to me anymore let alone an actual friend. He said goodbye and I just hung up. I was so angry.

    Now theres this guy I work with I've become friends with and meant about 4 months ago. I never acted on anything nor said anything because I was with the idiot and I would never cheat. But I knew I liked this coworker, he was even there for me when my dad died. He took me out to the movies the same week dad passed away. Mind you this coworker has 3 jobs and STILL had the time to SEE ME not just CALL ME. You see? Heres the problem, he was seeing this other girl before me and she started saying she was pregnant. However, she has lied to him on several occasions about not being able to see him or go anywhere with him but goes off somewhere with her ex boyfriend. She claims that she "needs her ex boyfriend for protection".....yeah, shes retarded. So anyway after her last lie this coworker left her and was really angry with her. Now that its been confirmed shes pregnant he went back to her. Story of my life. The baby might not even be his but he goes back....I know, I know, morally its the right thing to do. But her ex is a loser and he is a hard worker. Of course she would pin this on him if its the loser's baby. He said he went back to her because "His family wants him to be there for the kid." He shouldnt do what his family wants him to do....he should do what he wants to do within reason. Now despite this going on he has been very conerned with how I am feeling and whenever I am upset at work. Hes always been one to check on me and always wants to play xbox live together. He also said he wants to take me out to the movies again when that next x-men movie comes out.

    So I'm lost here folks, my dad died, the once love of my life changed into a pig, and the guy I am interested in is being sucked into a life that he doesnt want AND I'm getting mixed signals from him. I don't know if he likes me or is just a friend. Hes told me that he sees me as a "Pure, honest, and great friend" BUT hes incredibly tender to how I feel about things. He says I could call him anytime to listen. Whenver he sees me in tears he gives me my space but texts me across the room to see if I'm ok. Then he walks over to talk to me. Whenever we are in the breakroom he finds me and sits with me. Always calling me, "Trouble." lol. I just don't get it.

    Sorry for the novel folks, please, PLEASE help.

    4 AnswersSingles & Dating1 decade ago
  • Did he ask me to a date or just to hang outside of work?

    I work in a department store and there was a fellow there named Sam. I've been working there for about 4 years now and he became employed there about 6 months ago. When he first was hired we met cause our departments are near each other. Sometimes we would have to work together and that's how we pretty much met. For the next few months we would chit chat here and there I would wander to his department and him to mine. He had a girlfriend and met her not long after he was hired so him and I were only "work friends." I was with someone already as well but that recently came to an end. SO when him and I were "work friends" we would vent to each other about our significant others and so on and other advice to one another. Just yesterday I was at work on my day off he was there and he came by the comfort me. (My father passed away on the 22nd, I took a leave from work) He hugged me and we chatted. I had to go cause I with other people but as I walked away he said, "I don't have a girlfriend anymore!" he called me after me and I gave him a thumbs up and laughed. He yelled for me to call him later. (We would never talk on the phone, we would only text) so I was kinda taken back by that also being that he seemed almost happy that he left her and didnt seem to distraught. So I called him later and he instantly brought up the movie, "Paul" and asked if I wanted to go. So I said yes and we gabbed about Shawn of the Dead and whatever. Then as we normally do we started talking about whats going on in our lives then told me he left his girlfriend cause she was drama queen and so on. (long story) Then he said he wanted to hang out with me and wondered if I was ok with hanging with outside of work. He said he wanted more friends and he wanted to be single for awhile BUT he was very adamant that we hang out. He said he wanted to cheer me up and get me out of the house cause he wanted to spend time with me. I dont know if hes interested in me or if hes really into being my friend. He would have never offered to hang out before or call me when he was with her. Now that hes not with her hes all about it. I'm assuming he said the "single" spiel cause maybe he is shy? I'm getting mixed stuff from him. He wants to do something some point this week which I'm completely down for. So is he into me or just wants to be my friend?

    2 AnswersSingles & Dating1 decade ago
  • How do I fix this issue between my boyfriend and his step mother?

    It started when me and my boyfriend began to have problems. I posted a few things on facebook about how I was mad but not what I was mad about. I posted things like, "Men piss me off" or "Great my feelings dont matter." Nothing crucial or mean. I didnt even mention his name. Though it's obvious who I'm dating cause it says it on my profile. Anyway, his step mother texted me several times saying how I'm not ready for a relationship and I'm only playing head games with him. How I am a "selfish little *****" "Immature and her son deserves better." Hes in the military and he does need his head clear to learn what he needs to survive in the middle east next year, I get that. But I have feelings too....him and I argue but he runs back to his step mother and tell her how I get pissed when he goes out with his friends on the weekends drinking and smoking. I told him a billion times I dont care what he does, I just get mad when he tells me he would call me to talk but he goes out instead. (we are long distance) She thinks I am all negativity and all I care about are my feelings and I completely dont care for his. Thats far from the truth. His step mother and I got a long great and were good friends. theres no reason for me to be mad that he does out and does those things cause I drink and smoke too. She left me voiemails on my phone saying "You're a ******* *****. You play headgames. Its ok for you to go out and drink and smoke but he cant?" Then "You're just like his real mother, a selfish ****" Now keep in mind I helped his step mother when no one else did. I gave her money I didnt have and never asked for a cent back. I bought her home groceries when she couldnt....and I'm selfish? My boyfriend sent me money to pay a bill of his back at home. There was money left over. He said, "If you need it you can keep it." I sent the extra money back becase I didnt work for it, it wasnt mine. Keep in mind that "I'm a selfish little *****" All this happened because of stupid ******* facebook. She wont talk to me, she hates me and he is venting to her making me look like the piece of **** when him and I argue. I'm at a loss....what do I do? I've apologized but she wont talk to me at all. Theres no reason to be this mad about facebook. Its stupid...

    Help!!!!!!

    2 AnswersFamily1 decade ago
  • Possibly pregnant on Depo?

    I got my first depo shot (EVER) early June. My period for june was anywhere between June 5th to June 10th. When I got the shot, I got my period the 10th but I bled for 2 weeks. I was told not to have sex (or at least unprotected) for at least 2 weeks. My fiance and I had sex 3 weeks after I got the shot (The bleeding ended by that point). It was unprotected and amazing. He we had sex several times in a period of a week, so it was during the 4th week of me being on depo. So now it's late July and I havent gotten a period. Not even spotting. Nothing. Now I am aware depo makes you irregular and so on, but given it was my first depo shot ever, not even into the first month of it when I had unprotected sex, could I be pregnant? Usually a woman's period doesnt go away until the 2nd or 3rd round of depo. Could I be wrong? Anyway, I haven't gotten a period for July, it was suppose to be the begining of the month and it never happened. I am moody, crampy, tired all the time, sick, and more emotional than ever. Maybe its the paranoia of being pregnant thats doing this to me? Am I psyching myself out?

    Also, I took 2 PTs. The first a week ago and it was negative. I took another this morning right when I woke up and it was also negative. I have another one but I think I am going to wait until my (first?) second "missed period."

    Whats the likelihood I'm knocked up?

    4 AnswersPregnancy1 decade ago
  • How do I approach my fiance about his abuse?

    I've been with my man for quite some time now and I've noticed things about him from the get go that were kinda odd--especially things concerning his mother. I've become good friends his step-mother and she has told me some real horror stories about his biological mother. No, she isnt bad mouthing her just because shes her husbands ex. His stepmom has told me things about him from when he was little. Example, when her and my fiance's dad would get him back on the weekends he would always have a bizarre rash around his mouth. I've seen pictures and it looks like what they call a,"Lesbian rash." Whenever his real mom would drop him off. He was about 5-6 years old at the time. The stepmom would also tell me about how he would start to sleep walk or urinate himself at night whenever he spoke to his mother on the phone before he would go to bed. Sometimes he would make himself vomit because his mom would tell him hes fat and needs to stop eating so much. Now that my fiance is an adult some of these "disturbances" have carried over into his life as of now. He has this misplaced amount of loyalty to her;(example-no matter how much she talks **** on me or his dad or anyone else he cares about, he lets her do it. or how she manipulates him by the possible abuse or degrading him to get him to do what she wants my fiance to do) She gets him so angry on the phone sometimes he snaps at me and takes the anger he has for her out on me. Yes, they argue, yes he does stand up for me but he keeps going back to her. He says he won't "play her games anymore." but hes right back into her bullshit the next day. She also has these tendencies of holding his hand (Hes a grown man for ****'s sake!) kisses him on the mouth, and sits on his lap.(WTF?)She has also told me that and I quote, "I am his soulmate, NOT YOU!" I can see on his face that hes uncomfortable and embrassed but frozen with fear to say anything. All this has happened in front of me and I dont know what to say or do because I don't feel its my place to say anything. I know all the stories his stepmom told me are true because his father AND his grandmother told me the same stories on different occasions. His father and step mom told me she MAY HAVE had a "unnatural relationship" with my fiance due to the fact that my fiances mom STILL wants his father back. I've seen her blatantly flirt with my fiances father and tell him that she loves him right in front of her new husband. BTW my fiances parents where never married, she had my fiance when she was 16. His dad left her when he caught her in bed with her cousin (no joke) when my fiance was 6 months old. Ever since, shes been trying to get his father back and has been OBSESSED with my fiance's father and I think (as a few other people do too) she took out her tendencies on my fiance growing up because he is their son and shes just sick, mentally ill, and downright controlling.

    One last thing, a few days ago I was at his mothers house with him and she called him upstairs. They were up there for about 10 15 minutes and I hope to God nothing happened....I hope it wasn't what it seemed like. I asked about it later in private he said, "Its a secret." I asked, "What kind of secret?" To which he replied, "A good secret, about me and you." With a smile on his face. So I desperately want to believe thats the truth but I know what ends he is willing to go to to protect his mother. Heres the creepiest thing about it....that night him and I had sex and it was the best sex we had in a long time. I hope to God it wasn't some sort of psychological trigger with his mother to make him want sex so badly.

    I'm scared, I'm worried, and downright terrified for him. What can I do? What can I say? Is there anything I can say? I'm horrendously concerned, I want his well being because I love him. I know the signs of sex abuse because I was abused myself as a child. He knows I was abused and I told him everything. I just dont understand why he can;t be open with me....Why does he protect her? I don;t protect the person that hurt me anymore...I stood up for myself against him and I've already begun the path to healing.

    He wont tell me because he doesnt trust me? I've been there, I know what its like. Why wont he let me in?

    Is it really none of my business? I don't want this to effect our relationship more than it already has. I'm afraid he will leave me after awhile because his mother hates me and shes insanely jealous....What do I do?

    HELP.

    5 AnswersOther - Family & Relationships1 decade ago
  • Am I falling out of love or just suffering from a bad case of cold feet?

    I've mentioned this before here on yahoo answers, I have a fiance in the military who is away in Texas right now. We have been together for almost a year and we plan to get married at some point in October. Him and I have been fighting like crazy for the past month or so over stupid things like, "You didn't call when you said you would!" or "You lied to me about going to do this../You're avoiding me!" We had discussions about communication already and spoke about how we need to be more honest with one another. Pretty much it boils down to missing each other HORRIBLY. What he fails to understand that I have only seen him once in the last 5 months and talking on the phone is all we have right now. I feel he blows me off to do stupid things with this "friends" (People he won't ever see again after he leaves there in a week. He told me himself that they're "throw away friends" Obviously they dont mean much) Whenever we talk I could be in mid sentence of something and he will be talking or listening to one of his buddies. Then once he realizes that hes been caught he will just say, "Yeah...so I'm sorry that happened blah blah." EVERYTIME. He's been disrespectful and he thinks just because I'm at home I have it easier than he does. Hes far from home and I will say that he doesn't have it easy. I'm just ******* tired of him punishing me for being at home and disregarding my feelings because I'm where he wants to be. Its his fault that he joined the Navy, NOT MINE!

    Yes, him and I discussed all this and we got into a nasty fight last night over it. I've about had it....I love him dearly and I would fall apart if we split up....I just dont feel the spark anymore between us and all we do is argue. I dont know if its because the distance, cold feet because I'm afraid of getting married, or its just that I feel like I don't possibly love him anymore. I can't bite my tongue anymore when it comes to this crap he pulls, I lose my temper in a second and I cant stop screaming at him.

    Please, I really need some help. I need an honest answer...

    1 AnswerSingles & Dating1 decade ago