D (A/V) ID

A package arrived at my house. The address is correct right down to the postal code, but the name on it is nobody I know. I live in Canada and the package came by regular mail from the United States.

Can I keep it and open it, or am I obligated to return it to the sender?

I've been window shopping quite a while for a sporty car. I've compared a whole bunch that fall within my price range. There are probably others so please mention them. Also please quantify your answer with facts rather than opinion.

1) Mustang GT (base with no options)

2) Chevy Camaro SS (base with no options)

3) Hyundai Genesis Coupe V6 (loaded)

4) Nissan Altima Coupe (loaded)

5) Mitsubishi Eclipse GTP (loaded)

My brother is living in a different city on the other side of the country. I have never seen, or heard of, him having a girlfriend. I know he suffers from low confidence but he's not ugly, he is pretty smart, although not in a stellar job. He doesn't own a house or a car (very expensive where he lives) and he is 35 years old. I love him dearly and miss him. I think something is keeping him from moving back and it could be that he is gay and doesn't want anyone back here to know.

He's back for a few weeks now for a visit and I want to either help him gain the confidence to meet women, or ultimately ask him if he is gay. I don't want to insult him if he is not (would be quite the challenge to ones manhood). Then again maybe I should keep with he don't ask, don't tell mantra. We had an uncle who was gay which was only found out after his death. Everyone suspected but never asked. I'm pretty open minded and it wouldn't bother me if he was gay (I am not gay BTW).

Any ideas on how I should approach the matter.

My wife had been talking about getting a puppy for about a month now. We have three children and also foster several kids. We currently have two cats that pretty much look after themselves. I am the one that feeds them and I am the only one who changes their litter box.

Our house is busy already and I told her that i didn't want to get a dog at this time. I said that maybe when the kids get older and when one of the cats passes away we could consider it. She says that she will do everything and my 8 year old daughter can help too. I know puppies are a lot of work and I know that I would end up being the one to clean up any messes the dog makes, clean the poop in the back yard and take care all of the other responsibilities eventually.

Anyway, today my wife went out and bought a pug puppy. It is a cute, but I really resent the fact that she did this and I'm pretty upset. If I were to demand that she take it back I would look like an extremely mean person to my kids who have already seen, held and named the puppy. My wife kind of sold them on a dog over the past month by talking about it every now and again (manipulative *****).

What would you do in my situation?

My wife seems to think that looking at porn (mostly soft-core) is exactly the same as having an affair (emotional or sexual).

What is your opinion?

My wife took over complete control of our finances about 4 years ago because she was at home with the kids and it was easier for her to pay the bills online. Over that 4 years we have gone deeper and deeper into debt.

I can't seem to get control back. I don't want to be a jerk about it but every time I mention that I would like to start paying some of the bills but it never happens. She has her own income that is more than enough (almost as much as mine) to cover her third of the financial responsibilities.

I even went out and opened a separate bank account so that I could have my pay go into it and I would pay the bills out of it. I had a detailed spreadsheet outlining my debt elimination and bill payment structure.

She now dips into that account. She sometimes writes a check from our joint account, a day in advance of when she'll have money in that account, and deposits it into my account then takes the cash out. I don't know the name of it, but it's borderline illegal or at least immoral.

How can I make her understand what the implications of bad credit are?

How can I put it nicely that I don't want her using any of my credit cards, using my bank account or interfering in my side of the fiances at all?

I don't want to feel this way, and I respect my wife's freedom and let her do what ever she wants. Sometimes though I get suspicious.

Tonight she is going out with her sister and a friend to a bar or where ever. My wife and her friend are 30...I mean 29, and her sister is 20. She spent a couple of hours getting ready. Doing her hair and makeup and then tried on a few different outfits. She decided to wear one of her sister's mini-skirt type one piece dresses. The kind that if you bend over too much you would see her cheeks and underwear. She only dresses like that when she goes out to the bars with her friends and leaves me at home with the kids.

I don't want to tell her that what she's wearing is provocative and makes her look like a cougar on the prowl. It looks like what all the young girls wear to the bar when they're trying to pick up. I looks sexy...but maybe too sexy. I really don't want to be controlling in anyway because I think it's wrong. I would never tell her what to wear.

She is very controlling and untrustng of me. I went to the gym a couple nights ago after the kids were asleep. I thought she was too so I didn't tell her. I guess she wasn't asleep and she ended up checking my email and facebook and then calling the gym to see if I was there. I got grilled when I got home and accused of being out too long to be at the gym. I was there an hour and half, but she always exaggerates time against me and said I was gone 2 hours.

If I'm half and hour late home from work because I got busy she accuses me of cheating. She rarely lets me go out with my friends with out a guilt trip and a honey do list before I leave. I would never cheat and I never have even in the past with girlfriends while I was growing up. It's just against my moral fiber.

Should I be suspicious or jealous of her?

Do you think she is looking for attention from men at the bar?

Do you think her mistrust in me is just her being insecure?

Do you think she is mirroring her own untrustworthy personality in me?

My wife an I have been together for 7 years now. Over the that time sex has become less and less frequent. Before we married it was a daily occurrence. Now it happens, if I'm lucky, once every 6 weeks. She has told me that she doesn't want to be bothered during the week because she's too tired but then she's is always inviting one of the kids into our bed on the weekend. When I mention I don't like that she says that she promised him/her and makes a snarky remark that it's just because I want sex. I've been rejected too much that now I have anxiety about initiating sex because she'll say that all I want is sex. A lot of the time she says that she feels sick or is very very tired about half an hour before bed time. I don't want to initiate anything if she feels sick or have her tell me I'm insensitive for trying because she feels sick. I'm very very frustrated.