lytehoney08010

My fiance and I have been together for 10yrs. I have a daughter from a previous marriage and we have a 5yr old together. My fiance is a father to both children. My fiances 9yr old niece did something to our 5yr old daughter and his 5yr old nephew that leads me to believe she could be a developing sexual predator. She also threatened to kill my daughter with her brothers gun if she told on her. Our daughter is afraid of his 9yr old niece and doesn't want to be around her. I refuse to allow this child any contact with mine until her parents seek professional help. My fiances family disagrees. They don't think the niece needs help and they think I should allow her around my daughter, because they will supervise them. Due to my daughters feelings and the fact they are in denial I don't want her around my daughter period! My fiances parents came to our home to bring gifts, during which time his mother decided to bring up this situation. 8 days prior I had just lost a pregnancy and was going through an emotional time. My fiance was aware of this. His mother decided to try and dictate to me what she felt should happen between my child and her other grand daughter. Once I made my feelings clear, the conversation became heated. His mother tried to insinuate that if I felt this child needed help them my daughter from a previous marriage needed help with her anger. His mother tried to say that my daughter needed help because she scratched her grandson 4yrs ago for no reason. That was untrue! The situation was, this same niece that violated my youngest, kept hitting my oldest. Finally my oldest 10 at the time hit her back and then this niece went and got her brother 13 to try and fight my daughter and he got the worse end of it. Yet I'm being told my daughter needs help. My children were downstairs and could hear all of this, causing my youngest to piss herself. To make matters worse my fiances father joins in and both parents are shouting their opinions in my face. His father kept insulting me telling me my way of thinking is off and laughing in my face. My fiance stepped in 2-3 times but never asked them to leave. As the situation continued in our home. I feel my fiance left me hanging and allowed his parents to treat him like a boy in his own home. I don't feel any man should allow his woman to be disrespected in their home, especially by another man (father or not)! Do you think I am over reacting or do you think my fiance should have put on some man pants and told them to leave?

I have a 14yr old daughter from prev marriage and a 5yr old daughter with my fiance. We've been together for 10yrs. We've had a few boundary issues in regards to his family that he has ignored. Recently we found out his 9yr old niece did something to our 5yr old daughter and his 5yr old nephew that leads me to believe she could be a developing sexual predator. She also threatened to kill my daughter with her brothers gun if she told what she did. I decided that I don't want my daughter anywhere around her. My fiances family doesn't think the niece needs help and also think I should allow her around my child so long as it's supervised. My daughter is scared of her and doesn't want to be around her, so I will not allow any contact with this niece. 8 days after I lost a pregnancy my fiances parents came over to bring gifts to the kids. During this visit his mother decides to bring up this situation. It turns into a big dispute with mother and father both shouting their opinions in my face. They both were disrespecting me. His mother was also trying to use her Christianity as reason to dictate her feelings. Our children were also down stairs and can hear, during which his mother says something false, degrading and hurtful about my daughter from my previous marriage. My youngest also gets upset during this confrontation and pisses herself. My fiance stepped in 2 or 3 times, but I didn't feel it was enough. I felt he should have asked them to leave, yet he didn't. When the confrontation was over I was so sick and upset I vented on FB about how I felt including something about my fiances mom (didn't use names). I have 6 of his family members on my FB page who read it one is his sister (the mother of the 9yr old niece), but his mother is not on my page. My fiance said that his family is angry with me and feels I disrespected their mother. My fiance thinks I owe his mother an apology because she heard about what I said. Do you think I owe his mother an apology?

I had to break my situation down into three parts because people said it was too long to read! LOL! My in-laws came to my house under the pretense of bringing the kids Christmas gifts. My MIL used that time to initiate an argument over my decision to keep my daughter away from my fiances niece Kelly 9 because Kelly showed my daughter 5 some sexual things I didn't agree with on the internet, and threatened to kill her with her brothers gun if she told. My fiances 5yr old nephew had also stated that Kelly had been trying to force him to make out with her. During this confrontation my in-laws yelled at me in front of my children, causing my youngest to piss herself and insulting my oldest from a previous marriage by insinuating that if I say Kelly needs help my oldest does too because she tried to defend herself from being attacked by Will for hitting Kelly back 4-5 years ago. Will is 4 years older than my oldest daughter. MIL say my daughter attacked will for no reason, yet Will pushed MIL before. Either way my fiance sat back and allowed this to go on knowing I had lost a pregnancy 8days ago. I was very emotional and angry that all of this was happening and finally when the in-laws left I vented on facebook basically saying "I wanted to be left the hell alone, and anyone who has a problem with the way I protect my children can kiss my a$$ 3 or 4 times. You don't know me and you really don't want me to go off How dare you come to my home and claim to be a a so called christian and try to use a situation that doesn't apply as a tit for tat" gtfoh." My mother also said in response to my comment "My daughter is a good mother and she knows how to take care of her children and she will kick anybodies a$$ that feels like they are going to mess with me because I'm trying to protect my children. My fiances family got mad and felt like I am wrong for disrespecting my MIL, and basically it doesn't matter what she did to me I still shouldn't have disrespected her on my FB page. My fiance seems to think I owe MIL an apology even though her & her husband both disrespected me, my home and both of my children. What do you think?

I have had issues with my fiance for standing up for me when it comes to his family. Recently his 9yr old niece showed my 5yr old daughter a lesbian internet video then threatened to kill her with her brother Wills gun if she told. My daughter is afraid and doesn't want to be around Kelly. My daughters 5yr old cousin also said that Kelly keeps trying to force him to kiss her. I don't want Kelly around my daughter unless her parents get help because there is more details to that part of the situation. A few days after Christmas the inlaws said they wanted to come by and bring gifts. They did and we all sat and had a decent time. I ran upstairs and shortly after my MIL calls me down and immediately starts talking to me about what happened with the kids trying to force her opinions on me. Mind you I never spoke to anyone about this situation other than my fiance, so anything they felt about me was based on assumptions. They judged me and my opinions based off of assumptions and decided to address me based off of it. MIL felt validated by her opinion because she says she is a Christan that prayed on it and because she has raised 4 children. Nobody turned out that great for that to matter. It became hostile and my MIL tried to tell me that if I felt Kelly needed help then my oldest daughter (from a previous marriage) needs help because she attacked Kelly's brother Will and scratched him for no reason. That didn't happen, that way! 4years ago Kelly kept hitting my oldest and my oldest hit her back, Kelly got Will. Will 14 at the time tried to fight my oldest daughter10 at the time and he just so happen to get the worse end of it. Mind you Will also pushed and tried to fight my MIL before. Either way I told my MIL that had nothing to do with this and she was off base, she disagreed and stuck to her guns. All this happened while my children were right there. Also FIL got involved and between the both of them they began shouting their opinion dead in my face (MIL a foot away FIL 3feet away literally) as i sat on my stair case. My fiance was standing there as they got out of line, and attempted to step in 2 or 3 times but in the end I don't feel it was enough and he should have told them to leave. I had lost a pregnancy 8 days prior to this and was under a lot emotional stress. Also my 5yr old daughter got upset and pissed herself as her grandparents argued with me. I don't feel my fiance did enough and I think it was even worse that he allowed another man (father or not) to disrespect me in our home. His father actually stood there laughing in my face like I was a nothing and I had no rights. I was already wrong to them, before I could even speak. I also feel they didn't have the right to come to my home and dictate to me how to keep my child safe. They feel I should allow Kelly to be around my daughter if they say they will keep an eye on them, but my daughter is scared Kelly is going to retaliate because she told. What's your opinion.

My daughter spent the night over her grandparents house (in laws). Unknown to myself my fiances 9year old niece spent the night as well. During this time my Fiances niece Kelly took my 5yr old daughter in the computer room and closed the door. Once Kelly closed the door she logged in on the computer and pulled up a video of girls in their under clothes, making out and feeling on each others private parts. Kelly then started asking questions and telling my daughter about sex. Once the video was over Kelly told my daughter that if she told anyone she would get her brother Wills gun and kill her. Also My fiance was told by his brother that he could of sworn he walked in on Kelly with his 5year old son pinned up against the wall trying to force him to kiss her. When my fiances brother question his son, his son said that Kelly keeps trying to force him to make out with her. I got advice from a counselor, a leader in the youth group at church, and a friend that's a child service worker 9 years from my state. The counselor said it was considered as sexual harassment because she violated my daughters rights. She also said I had the right to contact the authorities. The church leader and social worker said Kelly could have been trying to groom my daughter. Grooming using sexually explicit material to coach my child into thinking it's ok to perform those acts and threatening her to see if she can enforce enough fear into my child to keep her from telling us, so she could victimize her at her disposal. My counselor also said it could be a possibility! The rest of my fiances family doesn't agree and thinks this was a one time incident or cousins being cousins. They want to sweep it under the rug. Am I wrong for not wanting Kelly around my daughter unless her parents seek a professional opinion and help?

Please just move on if you have anything negative that doesn't pertain to giving advice for my situation. Thanks. I posted this yesterday but, yahoo had tech issues so I'm trying again. In a relationship 10yrs. I have 2 daughters, one14 from a previous marriage, and one 5. There have been some issues with my fiance and I, because I feel he can't/won't stand up to his family for the sake of ours. Quick past run down MIL is intrusive and says underline BS often, my fiance has 4 siblings, all have children. FIL favors his daughter, and most would say her 3 children to. I've had several issues pertaining to my fiances niece Kelly (age 9, sisters youngest), regarding my 2 daughters. Mainly because Kelly constantly tries to start trouble with my oldest, calls her ugly, she isn't family, my fiance is not her father, hits her and has tried to get her big brother Will to fight my oldest for hitting her back on 2 occasions. Kelly also has tried on several occasions to hurt my youngest on purpose for the grandfathers attention as well as lie, and hit her several times. There have been many instances that I have asked my fiance to step in and he has not. Kelly took my 5yr old daughter into their grandparents computer room, closed the door, put a web video on the computer of girls doing nasty things to each other, and proceeded to talk to my daughter and question her about sex. After wards Kelly told my daughter that if she told anyone she would get her brother Wills gun and kill her. My daughter was scared and kept the secret for a long time, finally telling us. My fiance then told me his brother said that he believed he walked in on Kelly trying to kiss his 5yr old son. The brother then said when he asked his son, the son said Kelly kept trying to force him to make out with her. Kelly admitted to it all, except trying to kiss the cousin and saying she would kill my daughter with Wills gun. Instead Kelly said she told my daughter she wouldn't be her friend if she told. Will in fact does have a BB gun & a paint ball gun, and in my opinion a gun is a gun to a 5yr old. I feel Kelly needs help, and my fiances family can't think objectively because they would much rather believe this situation is just cousins being cousins or that Kelly isn't capable of possibly being a nut/sexual predator. They feel the incident should be swept under the rug, and we should just try to keep an eye out for the kids. I do not agree, and I no longer want Kelly around my baby, unless her parents seek help or a professional opinion. My fiances family is angry with me for that, and a few days ago his parents came over to our home under the pretense of bringing gifts. His mother decided to bring the situation up, I was fair and tried to hear her out. The moment I began talking his mother cut me off and decided to tell me that if I feel as though her granddaughter needed help, she felt my oldest needed help because apparently a story was told that my oldest scratched Will for no reason. Will got scratched because he tried to fight my oldest because she hit Kelly back, 4 years ago! This confrontation at my home with the in laws took place in front of both of my children. My oldest heard my MIL say she needed help, and my youngest sat there and pissed herself because her grandparents where arguing with us. Both parents were forcing and yelling their opinion in my face, the FIL was laughing in my face when I would try to explain myself and insulting me, my fiance did step in, but to me it wasn't enough or soon enough. My fiance knew 8 days prior I had lost a child at 8weeks pregnant. To me he should have asked them to leave immediately, especially knowing my health and the fact my children were there. He didn't, and when they left I needed to vent, so I put a nasty post on FB about his mother (no name) and how I felt. I talked to my fiance I let him know what I did on FB and why. That evening I thought we had closure, about moving forward. He felt he had to talk to his parents to let them know they were wrong, owing me an apology. After meeting with his parents (whole family there), siblings, spouses,& parents added their input mostly against me saying I was wrong for not wanting my child around Kelly and also for ranting on FB! My fiance comes home and rehashes the FB thing with me saying I owe his mother an apology for it and his siblings are mad at me for disrespecting their mother like that! FYI Kelly's mom has a lax carefree attitude and doesn't discipline her. Kelly is not in trouble for this situation and Kelly's parents never called me to ask my opinion or how I felt. The confrontation was the first time I spoke to anyone other than my fiance, so up until then everyone has assumed the worse of me! I would like to ask you guys for your opinion. Tell me what you think I am wrong for, and what my fiance is wrong for. When this closes I want to show him the feed back.

I added a home phone service about a month ago. Unfortunately I have the old number of someone who couldn't pay their bills. Despite the fact that on my answering service I have a detailed message saying that this is no longer this persons phone number and that it has been given to a new family by the phone company over a month ago they continue to call. I have even tried answering the phone and telling them personally, yet they get nasty and still try to harass me. I am on the the government call list and because they are not telemarketers it doesn't apply to bill collectors or lawyers. Changing my number is not an option because it costs each time you do and whose to say that when I change it I don't get another sorry saps old number. What can I do to stop them in New Jersey? Is this considered harrasment once you tell them and they continue to call?